mending bridges
complacent and happy don't necessarily go hand in hand
things have been crazy lately. makes you rethink things. i dunno. the past two weeks have had its ups and downs.
happy birthday to the loves of my life justin and orland ;p haha birthdays last all month yo.
hmphz on the 3rd. had a 1/2 day of school. had a rehearsal then went out on the town with my girlie paige. hit up the village. dropped bones on those mother suckers. drove her ass home. then went to go pick up the mail. a part of my usual routine. so im sitting in this center lane. waiting to turn left. its real trafficky out. so theres 2 lanes going north and one right turn lane. the 2 northbound lanes gave me way to go through. yeah, which wasnt the best thing in the world. so i went cos i didnt want the flow of traffic to cease. so i continued to inch forward to see if anyone was moving in the other lane. as soon as i saw clear, i went. yeah man, bad choice forreal. next thing i knew. this huge ass volve going about 50-55 smacks right into the passenger side of the car. yeah spun around about 1-2 times. smacked into a bank of snow. smacked my head against the window. glass shattered. everythings faxed up the a. first reaction, this cant be happening. called my dad. few seconds later. tons of cops and 2 ambulances. scary shit. i hate driving. so my "rabbit" was totaled. came out of the accident with a few bruises, nothing to bad. i'm pretty lucky. if that car went any faster. i coulda been hella hurt. so thanks to the g-0-d fasho. yeah the safebelt tugged on me pretty hard. panic attacks. yeah ultimately no fun. i couldnt even tell them my social security number at first.
yeah paranoia up until now. i drive like a grandma forreal. lola claire coming through. but im still saddened by the whole thing. many things i couldve done differently. woulda, shoulda, coulda.. always hoping but it never changes things. then i got to thinking. when i went to georgia. i got "saved" and the man was talking about how if we were a true believer and etc. nothing would ever happen to us. you'd always be in good health, you'd never be in accidents. that's crazy right? nah i believe it but i dont. fasho i'm down with god. i may not be the most upstanding christian person out there but i "keep the faith" so is it my own stupidy or a thing of destiny? one always wonders.
but im happy cos i got bernie :) lol just kidding. anyway. im a "free agent" now. it's kinda nice. went to pba yesterday. i've been seeing all of the OSK lately which has been refreshing. i forgot how much i missed the kids i grew up with. its bad to get "too carried" away sometimes. i'm going to stop being a complete hedonist. i won't live the "you only live once feel all the pleasures of life and seize the day" attitude for a while. i'll just sit back and lamp.
2 months and 9 days til graduation. yeah, til freedom more like it.
til next time kiddies.
things have been crazy lately. makes you rethink things. i dunno. the past two weeks have had its ups and downs.
happy birthday to the loves of my life justin and orland ;p haha birthdays last all month yo.
hmphz on the 3rd. had a 1/2 day of school. had a rehearsal then went out on the town with my girlie paige. hit up the village. dropped bones on those mother suckers. drove her ass home. then went to go pick up the mail. a part of my usual routine. so im sitting in this center lane. waiting to turn left. its real trafficky out. so theres 2 lanes going north and one right turn lane. the 2 northbound lanes gave me way to go through. yeah, which wasnt the best thing in the world. so i went cos i didnt want the flow of traffic to cease. so i continued to inch forward to see if anyone was moving in the other lane. as soon as i saw clear, i went. yeah man, bad choice forreal. next thing i knew. this huge ass volve going about 50-55 smacks right into the passenger side of the car. yeah spun around about 1-2 times. smacked into a bank of snow. smacked my head against the window. glass shattered. everythings faxed up the a. first reaction, this cant be happening. called my dad. few seconds later. tons of cops and 2 ambulances. scary shit. i hate driving. so my "rabbit" was totaled. came out of the accident with a few bruises, nothing to bad. i'm pretty lucky. if that car went any faster. i coulda been hella hurt. so thanks to the g-0-d fasho. yeah the safebelt tugged on me pretty hard. panic attacks. yeah ultimately no fun. i couldnt even tell them my social security number at first.
yeah paranoia up until now. i drive like a grandma forreal. lola claire coming through. but im still saddened by the whole thing. many things i couldve done differently. woulda, shoulda, coulda.. always hoping but it never changes things. then i got to thinking. when i went to georgia. i got "saved" and the man was talking about how if we were a true believer and etc. nothing would ever happen to us. you'd always be in good health, you'd never be in accidents. that's crazy right? nah i believe it but i dont. fasho i'm down with god. i may not be the most upstanding christian person out there but i "keep the faith" so is it my own stupidy or a thing of destiny? one always wonders.
but im happy cos i got bernie :) lol just kidding. anyway. im a "free agent" now. it's kinda nice. went to pba yesterday. i've been seeing all of the OSK lately which has been refreshing. i forgot how much i missed the kids i grew up with. its bad to get "too carried" away sometimes. i'm going to stop being a complete hedonist. i won't live the "you only live once feel all the pleasures of life and seize the day" attitude for a while. i'll just sit back and lamp.
2 months and 9 days til graduation. yeah, til freedom more like it.
til next time kiddies.