funfetti
the other week I was in a restaurant and I saw two bodyguards. it was like something from a movie. one of them was really, really tall, and the other was kind of short and bald. they just stood there in the lobby and looked grim in their big overcoats.
so I asked them if they were bodyguards, and they went, "not technically blah blah blah blah but we're from the federal government." then I asked the one guy how tall he was and it turned out that he was 6'11''.
then after that I had some friends over and we made shrimp and scallops because my parents were in florida and we watched amelie, chocolate, and the exorcism of emily rose, which is kind of a weird combination. then we baked a funfetti cake. I forgot to spray the pans with Pam so the cake pieces stuck when we took them out, and they tasted delicious but looked pretty leprous anyhow. despite all of this, kristi revealed herself to be a domestic goddess. she actually knows how to sauté. even with paprika. and using all of the appropriate pans and things, too. I stole them and banged on them with spoons when she wasn't holding on to them.
I'm also trying to learn how to juggle. that is a useful life skill. if somebody ever breaks into my house, he will be overwhelmed by my juggling skills and be forced to leave and redirect his life toward the pursuit of true beauty.
speaking of the japanese, I also bought a sand garden a couple of months ago. it's one of those ones that come in tiny boxes from barnes and noble. blair got one too, and we had sort of a feng shui contest that quickly dissolved into a violent and abusive argument over who was the most zen. I ended up throwing my garden at her. she was dominated.
that is all. over and out.
so I asked them if they were bodyguards, and they went, "not technically blah blah blah blah but we're from the federal government." then I asked the one guy how tall he was and it turned out that he was 6'11''.
then after that I had some friends over and we made shrimp and scallops because my parents were in florida and we watched amelie, chocolate, and the exorcism of emily rose, which is kind of a weird combination. then we baked a funfetti cake. I forgot to spray the pans with Pam so the cake pieces stuck when we took them out, and they tasted delicious but looked pretty leprous anyhow. despite all of this, kristi revealed herself to be a domestic goddess. she actually knows how to sauté. even with paprika. and using all of the appropriate pans and things, too. I stole them and banged on them with spoons when she wasn't holding on to them.
I'm also trying to learn how to juggle. that is a useful life skill. if somebody ever breaks into my house, he will be overwhelmed by my juggling skills and be forced to leave and redirect his life toward the pursuit of true beauty.
speaking of the japanese, I also bought a sand garden a couple of months ago. it's one of those ones that come in tiny boxes from barnes and noble. blair got one too, and we had sort of a feng shui contest that quickly dissolved into a violent and abusive argument over who was the most zen. I ended up throwing my garden at her. she was dominated.
that is all. over and out.