TBBT Fic: Sucker Punch

Apr 27, 2010 22:46

Okay, honestly, The Guitarist Amplification upset me, but at the same time, I kinda want fic. I want Leonard tentetively bringing up Sheldon's reaction to fighting, asking that question no one wants to ask, yanno, "did they hit each other/you")

Give him whatever answer you want, but I want some hurt/comfort Leonard/Sheldon.



Sheldon was unusually quiet during the ride home from the comic book store. Even with his gaze fixed straight ahead, his pale fingers tightly clutching the newest addition to his robot collection, the physicist still resembled a child that had been yelled at one too many times. The pinched, nervous expression was familiar to Leonard, but neither him nor Penny had observed the suspiciously watery eyes so openly before.

Leonard and Penny had refrained themselves from commenting on the man’s appearance, instead working together with extra sweetness to convince Sheldon to come back home. Once back at the apartment, Sheldon darted ahead out of earshot, not wanting to overhear any more snide bickering from his two… friends.

“Is he always like this?” Penny asked, walking through the door as Leonard held it open for her.

“Mmm, yeah. I told you, he doesn’t take fighting very well, unless he’s a participant in the argument. Even then, it’s not good,” Leonard replied. With a sigh, the scientist adjusted his glasses. “It does seem worse this time, though… Perhaps it’s because we haven’t fought in front of him before…”

“Aw, he’s so messed up.” In spite of her words, there was genuine concern in Penny’s voice. Leonard nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, but really, who likes to hear people fighting? Sheldon just takes things to the extreme.”

“Leonard… what if…,” Penny bit her lip, staring at her neighbor’s carefully blank expression. “You know… his parents hurt him?”

An odd mixture of confusion and anger clouded Leonard’s face, the curly dome shaking quickly.

“No! No, that isn’t possible. Sheldon’s parents actually loved him; they would never do anything…” Leonard trailed off weakly.

“Sometimes people say and do things in the heat of the moment that they normally wouldn’t do, and regret it. You know, like the stuff you said about my friend,” Penny added helpfully. Leonard gave his girlfriend a half-hearted glare, but his thoughts were still on Sheldon’s behavior.

Reaching the floor to their rooms, Leonard and Penny stood awkwardly, both eyes trained on the closed door of 4B as if they were trying to see inside with x-ray vision.

“You should talk to him,” Penny finally announced, heading towards her own door. “I’ve got to go pick up Justin.”

“Alright… see you later,” Leonard mumbled. Easing the door open, he peered inside, but his roommate was nowhere to be seen. It didn’t take long to drop his keys in the bowl and shrug out of his jacket, so Leonard found himself pausing outside of Sheldon’s door without the basis of a plan.

Taking a deep breath to steady his nerves, Leonard rapped his knuckles on the frame. “Sheldon…”

Silence.

“Sheldon, I’m coming in…”

“No one’s allowed in my room,” Sheldon finally spoke from his curled up position on his bed. Leonard ignored the statement and ventured in, standing awkwardly off to the side. His observations had already noted his friend’s defensive stance, and the fact that Sheldon’s face was hidden by his arms was not a good sign.

“I just wanted to talk to you…”

“The feeling is not reciprocated at this moment, Leonard.”

“Look, I know it upsets you when people fight, and I wanted to apologize for Penny’s and my behavior. You have to know, though, that all couples fight. All people get into disagreements, because everyone has a different take on life. You and I don’t always see eye-to-eye.” Leonard’s words were met with stony silence. Giving into the inevitable difficulty that was conversing with his friend, Leonard heaved another sigh and took a few steps forwards to sit down on the edge of the bed.

Sheldon’s shoulders tensed slightly, but the movement was so minimal that Leonard would have missed it if he hadn’t been watching for it.

“Listen, buddy… I was just wondering… is there a reason that you overreact when people fight?” Leonard blurted out. There was just no easy way to ask it. Or maybe there was… damn, he should have called his mother first. Well, no, she didn’t know the first thing about being comforting. Leonard mentally kicked himself for even considering the idea.

“I do not overreact,” Sheldon’s resentment was apparent even through the muffling of his pillow and arms. “Evolutionary speaking, verbal sparring is an indicator of social unrest and potential physical harm.”

“Sheldon…” Leonard’s breath hitched painfully, staring down at the lanky man. No easy way to say it, but why did it have to hurt so bad to ask?

“Has anyone ever… physically hurt you because of an argument?”

Say no. Say no. Saynosayno, god please say no…

Leonard could hear his heart thumping so loudly, he was surprised Sheldon didn’t comment on it. But no, Sheldon wasn’t saying anything. Leonard felt his heart drop.

“Buddy…”

Slowly, oh so slowly, Sheldon turned his head away from his pillow, his gaze telling Leonard everything in one glance. Scared. Sheldon looked so damn scared.

It wasn’t right. Sheldon could look arrogant, confused, put-off, indignant, proud, pleased or angry, but he should never ever have to look frightened.

“Sheldon,” Leonard whispered, laying a hand on his friend’s shoulder. The other man didn’t flinch under his touch, and that little bit of trust reassured his roommate a quark-sized amount.

“Who hurt you?” What idiot traumatized you so much?!

“December 13. I was eight years old. Mom and dad’s fighting had spanned over the past three days. Quite contrary to the so-called Christmas spirit,” Sheldon added bitterly. Leonard swallowed hard. Bitter was another rarely-seen emotion, although certainly more prevalent than fear. “I had long ago learned to stay out of the way when they started yelling, so I’m not aware of what specific trivial matter led to their argument, but by the thirteenth, they had moved on to criticizing personal flaws. Lazy butt, I told you to take off your muddy shoes. You damn harpy, I wouldn’t have to walk through the house if you hadn’t taken over the garage with your damn trashy gnomes. Excuse me for caring about the appearance of our home! Are you sayin’ I don’t pull my weight around here?! Oh, you’ve got enough weight; it’s just getting it to work that’s a problem!”

Sheldon fell quiet again as Leonard’s grip on his shoulder tightened in sympathy. To the shorter scientist, the argument didn’t sound that bad, but he knew Sheldon was withholding the worse. Unconsciously, Leonard’s hand slid downwards, lightly rubbing soothing circles in his friend’s back. Sheldon blinked up at him, twitching under the unfamiliar touches.

“Then what happened?” Leonard coaxed gently, letting his hand still in the small of Sheldon’s back.

“I simply suggested that my parents adopt a schematic approach to solving their differences rather than verbal acquisitions, but alcohol had impaired Dad’s mental cognition. He assumed I was sassing him and punched me.” Sheldon’s gaze flickered away, resting his head back on the pillow, ignoring Leonard’s sudden intake of breath. “The force of impact was so great that I was thrown backwards, but I landed on my side, effectively fracturing my right arm. I caught nosocomial pneumonia two days after visiting the doctor.”

“Oh, Sheldon… I’m so sorry… I can’t believe your dad would hit you, even under the influence…” Leonard bit his lip. Rage and disappointment burned towards the man he had never met. A father doesn’t destroy his children.

“Why are you sorry? You’re neither the one who got hurt nor the one who hurt me at that time.” Sheldon frowned.

“It doesn’t matter if I wasn’t the one who was hurt, I can still feel bad that you were in pain and physically assaulted by a parent!” Leonard’s voice was indignant. “Don’t you know anything about empathy?!”

“Of course,” Sheldon answered promptly. “I’m aware of the definition, and apparently I’m observing the effects right now.”

“God,” Leonard breathed, letting out a slow sigh. “No, you don’t know anything about it. Scoot over.”

Sheldon frowned at the command, setting up slightly to express his objections, but Leonard’s surprisingly firm gaze halted his protests for once. Curiosity got the better of his logical mind, and Sheldon found himself shifting away from the middle of the bed to make room for Leonard.

“What are the parameters of this social experiment?” he inquired, lying back on his side. Wary blue eyes watched as Leonard carefully reclined on his back then curled to the right in order for the two to be lying facing each other. He was going to have to wash his pillowcase after this; Sheldon momentarily considered pulling his pillow out from under Leonard’s head. His roommate should know better by now…

“I will consider this a success if you gain even a little understanding of the workings of human emotion,” Leonard replied.

“’A little’ is not a quantifiable standard, Leonard. No wonder your experiments produce unsatisfactory results if this is how you set up your research,” Sheldon returned. Distracted by Leonard’s hand coming down on his shoulder again, the physicist grew quiet, suddenly uncomfortable at the closeness.

“Sheldon Cooper, you are my friend, and as your friend, I never want to see you put in danger. Your well-being, both mentally and physically, is important to me. These sentiments extend to both past and future events, even though I can not do anything to change the past. This is called caring; I know you know what it is, even if you don’t realize it yourself. If you get hurt, it hurts me. Not because I have to deal with you, but because I don’t want you upset. I like my best friends content and their normal egotistical selves, mmk?” Leonard peered at Sheldon’s face, wondering if his talk was getting through that thick skull.

“You can not possibly entertain the idea that you can protect me from every negative aspect of the environment,” Sheldon replied, looking at his friend in disbelief. “A completely controlled environment for periods longer than a few days would be extremely difficult to enforce, especially considering the habits of Wolowitz, Koothrapali and Penny to just drop in any time they see fit. You also can not control what they say or do. Are you suggesting that I remain in my room with absolutely no outside contact?”

“No, I am not suggesting that! Geez, Sheldon,” Leonard huffed. “All I am saying is that I don’t want you to get hurt! And if you do get hurt, I want you to feel that you can talk to me about it…” Without thinking, Leonard leaned forward, pressing his lips against Sheldon’s forehead. Surprised at the turn of events, Sheldon could only stare at his friend.

“If you get hurt, I’ll be here to help you. Everyone needs comfort, Shelly,” Leonard murmured. He drew back slightly, taking in Sheldon’s wide eyes. A sudden desire to console and prove his care overtook the shorter scientist, and he leaned back in, bestowing another kiss on the pale skin. Beneath him, Sheldon drew in a ragged breath. There were no protests as Leonard shifted even closer, closing his eyes as he wrapped an arm tightly around Sheldon’s midsection.

“Am I supposed to be taking comfort in the fact that we are inhaling each other’s germs at an alarming rate?” Leonard couldn’t hold back a soft chuckle. Trust Sheldon to concentrate on microbes rather than the fact that his best friend was trying to cuddle with him. Not that he was enjoying this cuddling. No, Leonard told himself; this was simply an experiment. He couldn’t deny that it somehow felt natural, though. The fact that he was on Sheldon’s bed rather than Penny’s didn’t upset Leonard as much as he thought it would. Just the simple act of lying there with his roommate was sweeter and more victorious than any make-out session with Penny had been.

Penny. Leonard cracked open an eye to glance at his watch. Good; she was probably only just arriving at the airport. Starting to draw his arm away, Leonard froze as Sheldon’s hand suddenly clamped around his wrist. Rolling over onto his back, Sheldon draped Leonard’s arm over his stomach.

I like having my belly scratched. The unbidden memory stirred Leonard’s mind. True, they had been talking about alien species, but hey, why quibble? Tentatively, Leonard splayed his fingers across Sheldon’s stomach, watching it rise and fall with each calm breath. Digging the tips of his fingers into the soft fabric, Leonard began to scritch back and forth. Sheldon jerked in surprise, but relaxed as Leonard’s attentions did not progress further. After a minute of adjusting to the sensation of Leonard stroking his abdomen, Sheldon cleared his throat.

“I need guidance on how to proceed in this type of situation.”

“Well, there are two courses of actions you could take. Are you currently comfortable or uncomfortable?”

“I am not entirely ill at ease,” Sheldon replied thoughtfully. “My apprehension could stem from lack of familiarity with the situation rather than what you are doing with your hand.”

“Then close your eyes and enjoy it,” Leonard said dryly.

“Leonard? Should I assume that these events set a precedent for any future incidents of pain or admission of childhood issues?”

“If you want it to, yes,” Leonard sighed softly, letting his hand still. “I meant what I said earlier about being there for you, but at the same time, I don’t want to force you into something you are not comfortable with. Not that I could force you into anything,” he added with a half-smile.

“Leonard… your attentions are appreciated even if they are a bit excessive.”

“Oh? Does that mean you’ll come to me if you get upset or hurt?”

“Hardly.” Leonard frowned at the response.

“On a not unrelated topic, I suppose I won’t award you a strike if you do enter my bedroom with the goal of improving my mental well-being in the future if the situation requires intervention, however.”

Leonard nodded slowly, comprehension dawning. “So, you’ve accepted the fact that you need physical contact?” The physicist quirked a brow.

“I’ve accepted nothing of the sort. Physical contact is too broad of a generalization anyway. Your physical contact, perhaps.” Leonard shot Sheldon a surprised look, but the other man’s eyes were firmly shut.

“Ok,” Leonard whispered back, swallowing hard. How could anyone believe that life could be improved by the absence of love or tenderness?

Fics: Now with spot-the-Star-Trek-quote games!
Criticisms and comments make me warm and fuzzy inside.

pg/pg13, the big bang theory, fanfiction

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