Time Management 13/??
Title:Time Management
Genre: General
Chapters:13/??
Pairing:ReitaxRuki, ReitaxUruha, UruhaxAoi
Author:
cloudiestrife
Rating:NC-17
Warnings:Cheating, some alcohol abuse later on and maybe some mild violence
Summary: Ruki finds that his boyfriend Reita develops a bad habit of being late, what could the reason be?
Disclaimer: I dont own them D:
Comment: A note to my dear
my_turtle_pear IT HAS BEEN CHANGED SINCE YOU LAST READ IT.
It was strange how the heart worked; it could be broken in two and at the same time still function with no reason. Ruki found himself in that exact situation. He was hurt beyond all words yet still found himself deep down in love with the man who had done everything wrong.
Even now as the short blonde got dressed in silence he wondered why in the world he even agreed to stay. He had intended on coming over to tell Reita it was over between the two of them, instead he found himself giving in at everything the blonde offered. Although the vocalist was tired of all these apologies he just couldn't bring himself to say no. Part of him felt like he needed to slap himself and act like a normal human being rather than the spineless, pathetic excuse for a man he was at the moment.
When the bassist finished getting ready too Ruki hesitantly allowed himself to be dragged out the door, looking backwards as if the apartment was going to save him from something horrible. Soon enough he found himself standing in the lift in awkward silence. He didn't have anything to say, staring at the numbers as the lit one by one downwards as they descended down to the first floor.
Reita had again started his apologies about everything he had done. Although the tall blonde was an enthusiastic optimist he had began losing hope. He started to feel like he was fighting a losing battle with the vocalist who stood there like a statue. Reita was sure he was listening, his eyes gave him away as they silently glazed over with tears and yet the man stood completely still, not making eye contact or responding. Statues didn't talk, they didn't move, they did nothing.
The majority of thier night was spent outside. The rain had now dissapated into the evening leaving humid, heavy air in its abscence. Ruki felt smothered, walking around with his hands in his pockets and shoulders that were utterly tensed, body language that told the bassist one thing only: he didn't want to be touched.
Reita felt just terrible, he didn't know what to say or how to reach the man beside him. He was off in his own little world by now and so he reached over. Taking Ruki's arm gently, coaxing the smaller man to pull his hand from his pocket so that he could hold it in his own. Ruki looked up in surprise, eyes instantly locking with Reita's with a questioning expression. His first reaction was to hesitantly pull away but when the taller man made it clear he wasn't going to let go he gave up and went back to looking at their feet as they walked.
"Taka... talk to me please..."
Ruki silently nodded, but said nothing as he forced his eyes upwards. The bright look in the other man's eyes were fading out as he seemed to force a smile to his face "Just talk to me..."
"Why do you have to make things so hard for me...?"
Reita's forced smile vanished, squeezing Ruki's hand gently, "I'm sorry..."
After another moment of silence Reita's voice cut in again as he pulled Ruki into a shop, "You said this was our last night... can we make it a happy one...?"
Ruki didn't answer as he looked around at the jewelry in every direction, "I don't feel like shopping... can we leave?"
The bassist cut in, "Nonsense. Lets look around... okay?"
He watched as Ruki sighed in defeat and looked around, eventually a small silver ring caught his eye and he insisted the vocalist try it on. With much argument the smaller of the two agreed slipping it on his finger as Reita began to wave the store person over. When Ruki realized what his ex was doing he grabbed him by the arm, "Reita no"
Reita paid no attention to him, as he bought the ring and pushed the man out of the store, Ruki glaring at him before handing him the ring, "I don't want it"
It was bad enough the whole situation felt wrong to the vocalist, but having the man buy him something was only going to make him feel worse. Ruki could only get the sense that Reita was trying to buy his love back, or try to make things right by being generous. Part of him really just wanted to run away and leave the whole date in his dust but he couldn't do that to Reita so he settled for giving him an uncomfortable look.
"Don't be stubborn. Take it as a gift" Reita assured, cheeks slightly heating up as he put the ring back onto Ruki's finger. His heart began to pound in his chest for a moment as he locked eyes with the man he wanted so badly to call his again. He just had to convince him, had to show him some way or another that he deserved a second chance. He had learned from his mistake.
"No. Akira. I don't want it. It doesn't feel right. Take it back please" Ruki tried again to give it back feeling frustrated. He was quite ready to drop the silver piece into the storm drain beside his feet when Reita stopped him, "Ruki. I want you to take it. I'm not trying to bribe you or force you to get back with me. I'm not sucking up to you, or trying to buy your love either. It's a gift. Just a gift. Now please just... just take it okay?!"
Ruki felt his breath catch at the way Reita almost desperately tried to make his point, just a gift he told himself silently as he again felt himself give in and put it on, "okay...just a gift..."
Reita felt his heart skip a beat as the man finally accepted his present. All he wanted was Ruki's happiness, a smile or a warm look would have been the greatest gift in return at the moment. Instead he received a nervous stare as the shorter man shoved his hands back in his pockets and put on a rather forced look of happiness on his features.
"...Thanks for the ring" The vocalist mumbled as he tried to hide his expression behind his fringe. He had turned into a blushing idiot, not much better than a high school girl on her first date.
Turning to walk to the park that was near the area, Reita looped his arm with Ruki's hoping it was okay as the continued their small date. The park was empty, children having gone to bed at that hour as they separated. He watched Ruki settle himself down on a swing childishly before reaching out behind him to give him a push. The vocalist was surprised to feel movement before his mind registered the bassist had given him some motion and as much as he tried to force the corners of his lips to stay twisted downwards he couldn't surpress the small bit of childish joy he had in him at the moment.
"Higher" Ruki demanded as he loosened up a little bit. Reita complied giving Ruki another push with all his might before settling in the swing beside the vocalist to watch. He felt his heart lighten inside of his chest as they spent time together. Ruki was actually smiling, something he hadn't seen for days and the sight had brought on a smile of his own. Soon enough the two of them were both swinging towards the sky laughing as they bet each other which one would land farthest from the swings when they jumped. Reita landed the farthest away watching Ruki clumsily do the same, blaming his short legs for losing the game before heading back home. Some time passed and they found themselves yet again inside Reita's apartment, Ruki falling carelessly onto the bassist's couch as the other man came out with hot tea for the two of them.
They sat down and chatted idly about some good times they had together. If anything the taller of the two was just happy that Ruki had opened up a little and was talking to him. His optimistic side all but coming out again as he realized they made some progress together. Something kept eating away at his mind although he seemed happier than before, he didn't know where they stood. As far as Ruki seemed concerned it had been over between them but the conflicting messages he had received before them made him think otherwise. There was the sex, which Ruki didn't deny him, the mention of showing him that he deserved one last chance and now the openess he was receiving from the vocalist's end. Reita gathered enough courage to change the subject in their conversation, "Taka..."
He watched Ruki look up with a bit of a surprised expression at the tone of his voice, "Un, yes?"
"If you...don't want to be together anymore I can understand..." He started of.
Ruki's cheeks tinted a violent shade of red as Reita put his hand over the smaller one on the table but said nothing as Reita continued, "but if we cant be together... can we still be friends? I would really like that..."
Ruki paused and looked down at his cup, hand twitching almost nervously under the warm palm that covered it "I'm not sure..."
Reita felt his heart drop into his stomach at the response he got and looked down himself, lip trembling slightly as he nodded in silence. Nervousness began to eat at him and he found himself blurting out what he had to say with a quivering voice.
"Okay... I just am so sorry... I really do love you" He allowed his thumb to gently caress Ruki's knuckles.
This was his punishment wasn't it. What he deserved to begin with. He had been unfair to his boyfriend and because of it, he now risked losing just about everything he had with him.
Ruki bit his lip, "Akira... look at me..."
Reita obeyed and did what he was told.
"I know you love me. I know you made a mistake. I know you think I don't love you... but I don't hate you either and I hope you know that. It's not that I don't want to give you a second chance... I just can't bring myself to trust you anymore... do you understand that?"
Of course Ruki didn't mention that he loved Reita, that would be giving him too much and he watched on as the bassist's expression was wiped completely blank before losing the fight with himself to hide emotion. It was so evident that the other man really was trying not to cry.
"Do you still love me Ruki...?"
"I don't know... I'm sorry..."
Reita nodded, vision blurring with tears at the sudden surge of emotion he was trying to swallow down. Ruki could see it coming before the tears even began to fall from Reita's eyes. It was strange. Reita had always been the tough man.
He watched with dread as Reita lost with himself and pulled his hand away to wipe streaming tears. The vocalist felt terrible reaching out to take that hand in his own in a mothering way while the other hand tenderly touched the tall blonde's cheek, thumb stopping drops of emotion in their tracks.
Ruki shifted himself close to the other man and gave him a hug, feeling Reita's body shake harder as if the gesture had made things worse. He pet the other man's hair gently in sympathy, not knowing why he was being so kind in the first place as he tried to calm the other down.
If the situation wasn't bad enough the phone began to ring, Ruki shifting over to pick up the phone and answer only to find the caller display flashing the kanji for Uruha. He frowned, pushing the phone towards the man who was trying to pull his act together.
Genre: General
Chapters:13/??
Pairing:ReitaxRuki, ReitaxUruha, UruhaxAoi
Author:
cloudiestrife
Rating:NC-17
Warnings:Cheating, some alcohol abuse later on and maybe some mild violence
Summary: Ruki finds that his boyfriend Reita develops a bad habit of being late, what could the reason be?
Disclaimer: I dont own them D:
Comment: A note to my dear
my_turtle_pear IT HAS BEEN CHANGED SINCE YOU LAST READ IT.
It was strange how the heart worked; it could be broken in two and at the same time still function with no reason. Ruki found himself in that exact situation. He was hurt beyond all words yet still found himself deep down in love with the man who had done everything wrong.
Even now as the short blonde got dressed in silence he wondered why in the world he even agreed to stay. He had intended on coming over to tell Reita it was over between the two of them, instead he found himself giving in at everything the blonde offered. Although the vocalist was tired of all these apologies he just couldn't bring himself to say no. Part of him felt like he needed to slap himself and act like a normal human being rather than the spineless, pathetic excuse for a man he was at the moment.
When the bassist finished getting ready too Ruki hesitantly allowed himself to be dragged out the door, looking backwards as if the apartment was going to save him from something horrible. Soon enough he found himself standing in the lift in awkward silence. He didn't have anything to say, staring at the numbers as the lit one by one downwards as they descended down to the first floor.
Reita had again started his apologies about everything he had done. Although the tall blonde was an enthusiastic optimist he had began losing hope. He started to feel like he was fighting a losing battle with the vocalist who stood there like a statue. Reita was sure he was listening, his eyes gave him away as they silently glazed over with tears and yet the man stood completely still, not making eye contact or responding. Statues didn't talk, they didn't move, they did nothing.
The majority of thier night was spent outside. The rain had now dissapated into the evening leaving humid, heavy air in its abscence. Ruki felt smothered, walking around with his hands in his pockets and shoulders that were utterly tensed, body language that told the bassist one thing only: he didn't want to be touched.
Reita felt just terrible, he didn't know what to say or how to reach the man beside him. He was off in his own little world by now and so he reached over. Taking Ruki's arm gently, coaxing the smaller man to pull his hand from his pocket so that he could hold it in his own. Ruki looked up in surprise, eyes instantly locking with Reita's with a questioning expression. His first reaction was to hesitantly pull away but when the taller man made it clear he wasn't going to let go he gave up and went back to looking at their feet as they walked.
"Taka... talk to me please..."
Ruki silently nodded, but said nothing as he forced his eyes upwards. The bright look in the other man's eyes were fading out as he seemed to force a smile to his face "Just talk to me..."
"Why do you have to make things so hard for me...?"
Reita's forced smile vanished, squeezing Ruki's hand gently, "I'm sorry..."
After another moment of silence Reita's voice cut in again as he pulled Ruki into a shop, "You said this was our last night... can we make it a happy one...?"
Ruki didn't answer as he looked around at the jewelry in every direction, "I don't feel like shopping... can we leave?"
The bassist cut in, "Nonsense. Lets look around... okay?"
He watched as Ruki sighed in defeat and looked around, eventually a small silver ring caught his eye and he insisted the vocalist try it on. With much argument the smaller of the two agreed slipping it on his finger as Reita began to wave the store person over. When Ruki realized what his ex was doing he grabbed him by the arm, "Reita no"
Reita paid no attention to him, as he bought the ring and pushed the man out of the store, Ruki glaring at him before handing him the ring, "I don't want it"
It was bad enough the whole situation felt wrong to the vocalist, but having the man buy him something was only going to make him feel worse. Ruki could only get the sense that Reita was trying to buy his love back, or try to make things right by being generous. Part of him really just wanted to run away and leave the whole date in his dust but he couldn't do that to Reita so he settled for giving him an uncomfortable look.
"Don't be stubborn. Take it as a gift" Reita assured, cheeks slightly heating up as he put the ring back onto Ruki's finger. His heart began to pound in his chest for a moment as he locked eyes with the man he wanted so badly to call his again. He just had to convince him, had to show him some way or another that he deserved a second chance. He had learned from his mistake.
"No. Akira. I don't want it. It doesn't feel right. Take it back please" Ruki tried again to give it back feeling frustrated. He was quite ready to drop the silver piece into the storm drain beside his feet when Reita stopped him, "Ruki. I want you to take it. I'm not trying to bribe you or force you to get back with me. I'm not sucking up to you, or trying to buy your love either. It's a gift. Just a gift. Now please just... just take it okay?!"
Ruki felt his breath catch at the way Reita almost desperately tried to make his point, just a gift he told himself silently as he again felt himself give in and put it on, "okay...just a gift..."
Reita felt his heart skip a beat as the man finally accepted his present. All he wanted was Ruki's happiness, a smile or a warm look would have been the greatest gift in return at the moment. Instead he received a nervous stare as the shorter man shoved his hands back in his pockets and put on a rather forced look of happiness on his features.
"...Thanks for the ring" The vocalist mumbled as he tried to hide his expression behind his fringe. He had turned into a blushing idiot, not much better than a high school girl on her first date.
Turning to walk to the park that was near the area, Reita looped his arm with Ruki's hoping it was okay as the continued their small date. The park was empty, children having gone to bed at that hour as they separated. He watched Ruki settle himself down on a swing childishly before reaching out behind him to give him a push. The vocalist was surprised to feel movement before his mind registered the bassist had given him some motion and as much as he tried to force the corners of his lips to stay twisted downwards he couldn't surpress the small bit of childish joy he had in him at the moment.
"Higher" Ruki demanded as he loosened up a little bit. Reita complied giving Ruki another push with all his might before settling in the swing beside the vocalist to watch. He felt his heart lighten inside of his chest as they spent time together. Ruki was actually smiling, something he hadn't seen for days and the sight had brought on a smile of his own. Soon enough the two of them were both swinging towards the sky laughing as they bet each other which one would land farthest from the swings when they jumped. Reita landed the farthest away watching Ruki clumsily do the same, blaming his short legs for losing the game before heading back home. Some time passed and they found themselves yet again inside Reita's apartment, Ruki falling carelessly onto the bassist's couch as the other man came out with hot tea for the two of them.
They sat down and chatted idly about some good times they had together. If anything the taller of the two was just happy that Ruki had opened up a little and was talking to him. His optimistic side all but coming out again as he realized they made some progress together. Something kept eating away at his mind although he seemed happier than before, he didn't know where they stood. As far as Ruki seemed concerned it had been over between them but the conflicting messages he had received before them made him think otherwise. There was the sex, which Ruki didn't deny him, the mention of showing him that he deserved one last chance and now the openess he was receiving from the vocalist's end. Reita gathered enough courage to change the subject in their conversation, "Taka..."
He watched Ruki look up with a bit of a surprised expression at the tone of his voice, "Un, yes?"
"If you...don't want to be together anymore I can understand..." He started of.
Ruki's cheeks tinted a violent shade of red as Reita put his hand over the smaller one on the table but said nothing as Reita continued, "but if we cant be together... can we still be friends? I would really like that..."
Ruki paused and looked down at his cup, hand twitching almost nervously under the warm palm that covered it "I'm not sure..."
Reita felt his heart drop into his stomach at the response he got and looked down himself, lip trembling slightly as he nodded in silence. Nervousness began to eat at him and he found himself blurting out what he had to say with a quivering voice.
"Okay... I just am so sorry... I really do love you" He allowed his thumb to gently caress Ruki's knuckles.
This was his punishment wasn't it. What he deserved to begin with. He had been unfair to his boyfriend and because of it, he now risked losing just about everything he had with him.
Ruki bit his lip, "Akira... look at me..."
Reita obeyed and did what he was told.
"I know you love me. I know you made a mistake. I know you think I don't love you... but I don't hate you either and I hope you know that. It's not that I don't want to give you a second chance... I just can't bring myself to trust you anymore... do you understand that?"
Of course Ruki didn't mention that he loved Reita, that would be giving him too much and he watched on as the bassist's expression was wiped completely blank before losing the fight with himself to hide emotion. It was so evident that the other man really was trying not to cry.
"Do you still love me Ruki...?"
"I don't know... I'm sorry..."
Reita nodded, vision blurring with tears at the sudden surge of emotion he was trying to swallow down. Ruki could see it coming before the tears even began to fall from Reita's eyes. It was strange. Reita had always been the tough man.
He watched with dread as Reita lost with himself and pulled his hand away to wipe streaming tears. The vocalist felt terrible reaching out to take that hand in his own in a mothering way while the other hand tenderly touched the tall blonde's cheek, thumb stopping drops of emotion in their tracks.
Ruki shifted himself close to the other man and gave him a hug, feeling Reita's body shake harder as if the gesture had made things worse. He pet the other man's hair gently in sympathy, not knowing why he was being so kind in the first place as he tried to calm the other down.
If the situation wasn't bad enough the phone began to ring, Ruki shifting over to pick up the phone and answer only to find the caller display flashing the kanji for Uruha. He frowned, pushing the phone towards the man who was trying to pull his act together.