(no subject)
Have you ever loved someone so much that u stoped doing things with them so you wouldnt hurt them, because the fact that your mad at yourself and others around you? Have you ever had feelings for someone, but wasnt sure if they would last as long as you would like them to? Have you ever cried for no reason? Have you ever hurt urself because you thought it would make everything alright? Have you ever had second thoughts on your life? Or havent you. Well i have... im hating myself for it. I love him so much. But my body and soul is hating myself right now and its ruining us. Its ruining my perfect life, the lift i've always wanted, the life i thought could change everything around. Why my life, why not someone elses. Why does my anger have to come out on myself and ruin my perfect image, and my perfect friends and my perfect soul. Why cant i be the one who gets to run trough fields and fields of flowers, and rainbows and big fluffy bunnys. Why am i always mad at myself and having second thoughts about everything, and anything. Why cant i just go with the flow, why is everything happening now, and to me. WHY?
I love you, dont let me leave you!