Celabrate the life you lived.. not the shit you missed out on
I'm sorry everyone... Please read this if you wanna know how i am feeling. My grandma is not doing good... She had a heart attack wednesday and thursday she was at Mercy Hospital and they took her to Ann Arbor coz they couldn't help her, they told her she would die if she stayed there. So i was freaking out hard core, now she's in Ann Arbor, and she had a stroke last night. She doesn't even reconise people in the family anymore and she told my cousin Robin last night that the pain is so unbarable that she either wants this operation to work or she would rather pass away. Me and My grandma were closer than anyone else in the family, she always stood by myside in any endever that i chose, wether it was bad or good, she always gave me support. I'm a fucking mess with our her, she is the only person in my family that i have never had a problem with. She was more like a mother to me than a grandma, she was my life!!! Brandi is freaked out coz she's never seen me like this, i'm trying to go about my normal life routine but it's so hard, i just don't care about anything right now, i can't sleep at night, my mind wonders during the day, i cry when ever i'm alone, i'm bringing the people down around me, The worst fucking part about it... I CAN'T BE THERE WITH HER!!! I'M IN FUCKING WASHINGTON WAITING ON PHONE CALLS 24 HOURS A FUCKING DAY!!! I FUCKING WISH I COULD TAKE MY GRANDMA'S PAIN AND LET HER LIVE TO SEE MY FIANCE` AND THE KIDS ME AND HER WANT TO HAVE!!!! I'm a fucking mess with out her! fuck it... such as life!!!! bye