The End of Summer
Oddly enough I've forgotten that I'll be entering my senior year of college tomorrow.
UNFORTUNATELY, I REALLY feel as though I've missed out on my ENTIRE college experience; didn't make any ONE lasting friend; ended up estranging my high school friends, and never got a job. *slumps* wait, no, I did get one job; and then there were my summers..
AH well, honestly, it's the one thing I regretted the most.
List of things I regretted the most
1. Loosing the chance to study abroad (I'm not fully satisfied that I got to go to France for only 12 days, that's less than 2 weeks, honestly; I've still got $350 in debt)
2. Befriending new people. (Honestly, if you're not hating your project partners, you just end up seeing them 1.5 hours, twice a week, for 11 weeks including exams; that's not exactly an environment to socialize)
3. joining a club (I hated the hours and sororities were a no-no; too much committment)
4. Finding a romantic relationship (see reason 2)
5. Partying (This one's not really something I regret seeing I'm a too much of a wimp to party and making a fool of myself)
6. Attend a job fair (I should have the guts this year, that's my new goal)
7. Live alone (Yup.)
8. Switching majors at the end of Sophomore year and officially declaring it beg. of Junior year.
9. Still not sure whether I chose the correct major for myself.
10. Not finding jobs during my school vacations, like being a retailer, or waitressing, or bartender...(not the last.) and only succeeding once, and OMG, repurcussions of that is still affecting me.
I feel like I should end it here, because otherwise I'm so pathetic, but I GOTTA GET IT ALL OUT.
11. Missed out the chance to bond with my Japanese classmates (but honestly, most of them were VERY very obnoxious, so much that I want to wring their necks sometimes; it's really like high school all over again, and this time I'm opting OUT)
12. Not getting straight As. (Bashes head. Admittedly I overestimated myself; I don't think my college is really great; there are a LOT of stupid classmates over these past 3 years, and some of the professors have me question their certification to teach; and yet I wasn't able to get As. It's not so much laziness as it was me not realizing the CHALLENGE until the end. (but I feel like that's what your grade process is for, knowing my standing at midterms is NOT enough to change my grade) but really, humbleness is something I'm still working on achieving; however, at the same time I'm trying to overthrow my selfconsciousness and gather enough arrogance to build selfesteem. I don't know how this plays out. Maybe it's not working?)
13. Building connections. I did not register myself in an Key membership, or get invovled in any school groups; basically I should have joined some chapter of my major; but the idea of attending those intimidates me greatly; so I never did. I wonder if I'm not too late; however, paying a fee doesn't make me happy knowing I might not attend events. Final say: too lazy to commit? Yea.
...I think 13 is enough; I'm pretty satisfied with my grade; although my GPA's been dropping *more headdesk* and my biggest regret is my lack of socializing and the fact I didn't take enough initiative to gain more field experience. Ah well, at least I'm not a lost cause in the latter department- that makes me feel better; and on the otherhand, due to my dead social life, I've gained a better relationship with my mom, which is awesome. SAD, but AWESOME. I'm so happy I'm not one of those who hates their family (although I do resent them a little bit for never giving me the option of studying outside the city). My final regret is my lack of a romantic relationship; since I still feel juvenile towards those of the opposite sex; as in I still punch them to show my affection >_
UNFORTUNATELY, I REALLY feel as though I've missed out on my ENTIRE college experience; didn't make any ONE lasting friend; ended up estranging my high school friends, and never got a job. *slumps* wait, no, I did get one job; and then there were my summers..
AH well, honestly, it's the one thing I regretted the most.
List of things I regretted the most
1. Loosing the chance to study abroad (I'm not fully satisfied that I got to go to France for only 12 days, that's less than 2 weeks, honestly; I've still got $350 in debt)
2. Befriending new people. (Honestly, if you're not hating your project partners, you just end up seeing them 1.5 hours, twice a week, for 11 weeks including exams; that's not exactly an environment to socialize)
3. joining a club (I hated the hours and sororities were a no-no; too much committment)
4. Finding a romantic relationship (see reason 2)
5. Partying (This one's not really something I regret seeing I'm a too much of a wimp to party and making a fool of myself)
6. Attend a job fair (I should have the guts this year, that's my new goal)
7. Live alone (Yup.)
8. Switching majors at the end of Sophomore year and officially declaring it beg. of Junior year.
9. Still not sure whether I chose the correct major for myself.
10. Not finding jobs during my school vacations, like being a retailer, or waitressing, or bartender...(not the last.) and only succeeding once, and OMG, repurcussions of that is still affecting me.
I feel like I should end it here, because otherwise I'm so pathetic, but I GOTTA GET IT ALL OUT.
11. Missed out the chance to bond with my Japanese classmates (but honestly, most of them were VERY very obnoxious, so much that I want to wring their necks sometimes; it's really like high school all over again, and this time I'm opting OUT)
12. Not getting straight As. (Bashes head. Admittedly I overestimated myself; I don't think my college is really great; there are a LOT of stupid classmates over these past 3 years, and some of the professors have me question their certification to teach; and yet I wasn't able to get As. It's not so much laziness as it was me not realizing the CHALLENGE until the end. (but I feel like that's what your grade process is for, knowing my standing at midterms is NOT enough to change my grade) but really, humbleness is something I'm still working on achieving; however, at the same time I'm trying to overthrow my selfconsciousness and gather enough arrogance to build selfesteem. I don't know how this plays out. Maybe it's not working?)
13. Building connections. I did not register myself in an Key membership, or get invovled in any school groups; basically I should have joined some chapter of my major; but the idea of attending those intimidates me greatly; so I never did. I wonder if I'm not too late; however, paying a fee doesn't make me happy knowing I might not attend events. Final say: too lazy to commit? Yea.
...I think 13 is enough; I'm pretty satisfied with my grade; although my GPA's been dropping *more headdesk* and my biggest regret is my lack of socializing and the fact I didn't take enough initiative to gain more field experience. Ah well, at least I'm not a lost cause in the latter department- that makes me feel better; and on the otherhand, due to my dead social life, I've gained a better relationship with my mom, which is awesome. SAD, but AWESOME. I'm so happy I'm not one of those who hates their family (although I do resent them a little bit for never giving me the option of studying outside the city). My final regret is my lack of a romantic relationship; since I still feel juvenile towards those of the opposite sex; as in I still punch them to show my affection >_