maybe he won't find out what i know, you were the last good thing about this part of town.
so last night we went to another party. this guy dave had a bunch of people over and so having nothing else to do in punxsy, we went *me, kerrie, katie, amanda, and kevin*. we were all having lots of fun..altho i think mike got mad at me...then since katie and i were drinking we couldn't go back to the dorms, so we stayed at her friend ian's house. i'm leaving out a lot of details, but it's all good. nothing happened; again turned down the offers. even when i'm drinking i can't do the casual thing...i don't even want to. anyway, then this morning katie said someone said something about me...saying that i said some bad stuff about her. first of all, this is why i don't have a lot of girl friends, normally. second of all, i wouldn't do that. i, of all people, am trying to stay out of dramatic situations and i wouldn't lie to a friend. i wouldn't lie period. anyone who knows me knows i hate lying of any kind. thirdly, why would i want to cause problems with someone who i live with?
does this make any sense?
no. it doesn't.
so naturally, i'm sitting here and doing my homework *well about to* figuring whatever is going to happen is going to happen no matter what i do. so i might as well just do my homework, clean my room, and forget about it, until the subject comes up again.
i just want something familiar...anything familiar. i want a friend i can trust. i want a parent who will tuck me in when i'm sick and give me soup. i want to go home, to my bed in my room in my house with my smells. i want to wake up and know exactly where i am. i want to go to walmart and know everyone there. i want to be comfortable in my own skin. i want to not be afraid to be myself. i just want to go home. i'm so tired of this....and it's only been 2 weeks. i hate it. i hate myself. can't i be someone else for a while?
who ever thought i would miss carlisle?? definitely not me. i've cried so much since i got here, it's not even funny.
does this make any sense?
no. it doesn't.
so naturally, i'm sitting here and doing my homework *well about to* figuring whatever is going to happen is going to happen no matter what i do. so i might as well just do my homework, clean my room, and forget about it, until the subject comes up again.
i just want something familiar...anything familiar. i want a friend i can trust. i want a parent who will tuck me in when i'm sick and give me soup. i want to go home, to my bed in my room in my house with my smells. i want to wake up and know exactly where i am. i want to go to walmart and know everyone there. i want to be comfortable in my own skin. i want to not be afraid to be myself. i just want to go home. i'm so tired of this....and it's only been 2 weeks. i hate it. i hate myself. can't i be someone else for a while?
who ever thought i would miss carlisle?? definitely not me. i've cried so much since i got here, it's not even funny.