Painful disappointment
These few days of school has been not really good for me, mainly because we got back most of our exam scripts, and I didn’t do well for lots of subjects. Well, just blame me for it. I really don’t blame the teachers or my parents or whoever, but just myself. I’m not that... well... angry, but more of disappointed in myself. I could have done so much better, but instead all I achieved was so little.
I feel even worse because no one scolded me for doing so badly!!!! I wished they scolded me or something! Encouraging me seems worse... Even my mom said, ‘Don’t be discouraged, it’s alright. Just work hard from now on. Don’t be discouraged and give up. Study consistently and you’ll be okay.’ I’m really disappointed in myself. I thought I was doing well and suddenly the exams dropped a bomb in me and woke me up with the tremors it brought.
Although I scored better than some people, how could I be proud? It was below my expectations. But I decided that I’ll take the advice of all the people around me, and study consistently from now on. I’ll have a balance of study and fun, and not study all the time, or play all the time. I guess I was wrong before. I’ll correct myself today!(: I was really really sad when I got back my scripts, and I felt bawling! Sometimes Secondary School really has its disadvantages... Everything we do will be included for the final exam! It’s like the feeling of guilt sticking to you for your whole life! Even if you do well for the other 3 exams, the stigma of not doing well in the first exam will get to you, and the proof of it will be written down in black and white in your report card. Maybe they should change the system of examinations in Secondary School! Ha-ha. Just a thought.
But I’ll really work hard this time. Sometimes I’m afraid of saying something that I might be tired of doing on later on, and I know that I WILL be tired of studying consistently like what I’m promising myself now, but this time it’s for real. When I get tired I’ll remember of the disappointment I felt this exam, and I’ll go on. No matter how tired I get, I’ll still go on. People , support me! Haha.