TWO PAGE SPREAD OF ME IN THE LATEST L.A. WEEKLY!

[clintcatalyst]

While I didn't think I'd be making my way "round these parts," looks like vanity has the best of me at the moment. (Sad, but true...I'll admit.)

At any rate,

I'm one of the five "featured folks" on the cover page of their site (LAWeekly.com), which is an honor:

Comments

Hendrix College Can Suck My Buttsickle!

[clintcatalyst]

Since that snatch-ass in charge of campus "publicity" or whatever had the unmitigated gall to mail my mom a package of "scandalous" photo shoots, interviews, and writings with the request that I cease mentioning Hendrix College in the media so as not to taint their reputation, my attitude has been You Fucking Think After 50 Grand Your Inane Ass Is Going To Dictate My Actions?

So, of course, I give the campus NO mention in any (cough, cough) "mainstream" media coverage of me...but anything incendiary? You can fucking bet your BUTTPLUG on that! ;)

It's sick and fantastic to think you're a staff member there now, though sad to think that once was a liberal oasis has continued its decline into mainstream mediocrity.

I might actually shed a tear as if I gave a shit; but the high dosages of Zoloft and Wellbutrin I'm on prevent any histrionic "human activity."

Bah ha ha ha...

That's why my pal Pedro was peeved that Arkansas was identified as "The Midwest," when my response was that I couldn't care less. It's a hasty generalization-and full of exceptions, yes-but the brash bitch still housed inside this considerably mellowed SoCal version of me still views it like this: "It's one 'Fly-Over State' versus another. If they're Red, I'd rather wipe and flush than waste the brain cells to pontificate over it..."

Of course, I have things of great meaning and endless depth to mourn instead:

Namely, the official "death of my youth" coupled with the fact that the botox injections I got in my forehead didn't take.

(Footage chronicled on Clintcatalyst.buzznet.com if ya doubt me, bee-yatch!)

Always great hearing from ya, babes...

x o x o x o x

Re: Hendrix College Can Suck My Buttsickle!

[ellbogen]

And such sentiments, my friend, are why I love you.

PLEASE Please please mention this place as often as humanly possible. That is absolutely scandalous that they'd give you a cease-and-desist order. I am totally mortified. This only goes to show the whole brand mentality I was mentioning. They should be kissin' your ass and proud that one of their graduates turned out to be so fabulous. Dr. Hines and the other remaining English folks are as proud of you as ever. And I know I mention your glories every chance I get...

...But I've gotta go put on my Hogwarts robes and go swelter at graduation and get parental P.R. photos taken of me and the little kiddies. There are still a few who are worthy of it.

On the upside, I'm a token gay icon on this campus. They can't stifle that at least. hah!

It's 5:41 a.m. and I'm Just Now Heading To Bed...

[clintcatalyst]

(Yeah, I keep those "vampire hours" still, beloved-- only without the black garbage bags to block out light a lá Couch Hall's "Club 125.")

B
U
T
:

I wanted to make sure you let Dr. Hines know I send my best regards and still think of her often!

Ain't NOBODY can spot a comma splice like that lady, and--contrary to the fact that I've embraced a great deal of contemporary urban vernacular (be in with a wriggled tongue-in-cheek or otherwise)--those are still some skills that'll ALWAYS pay my bills! Ya naw mean?

♥