"I can see him," Dean said, amazed. "Her. It. Whatever."
"Him," Sam said with a nod. "He's a him. I can see him too."
"He's kind of hard to miss," Dean said.
Sam agreed. "Yes. So big."
"And furry."
"And... big." Dean thought it was a point worth reiterating.
"And who cares?" said Oscar, grouchily. "Stop crowding my alley! Go have your creepy hallucinations somewhere else."
Sam whirled around to glare at Oscar. "But he's not a hallucination," Sam said. "We've just proven it once and for all!"
"You're bothering Slimey," Oscar said. He banged on the side of his trash can. "You're too noisy and you're packing heat. We don't like people packing heat on this street."
"He's got a point," Sam pointed out. "This is supposed to be a kids' show."
"So now it's a family show with a loaded .45," Dean said. "Who the fuck cares?"
"Dean!" Sam snapped. "No cussing!"
"I'm not cussing!"
"You said 'fuck'!"
"Sam, I can't believe you just said 'fuck' on a kids' show!"
"You said it first!"
"Jeez-louise," Oscar said, shaking his head. "You two are worse than Bert and Ernie. Go back to your pad and kiss and give mutual blow-jobs and make-up already."
They both turned to stare at Oscar.
"Dude," Sam said, horrified. "You can't say that on a kids' show."
"Bite me," said Oscar. "Kids these days are tough. They know the score."
"Do they know Snuffie is real?" Dean asked.
Sam gaped at him.
"What?" Dean said. "It's important! You cried for three weeks when I tried to tell you Snuffie wasn't real!"
"It was like five minutes," Sam said, but the tips of his ears were turning red. "And I was four. And Snuffie is real!"
"I'm need popcorn for this," said Oscar. He pulled a crinkled, greasy microwave bag out of his trashcan. "Look at that! It's my lucky day."
"You lied to me, you asshole." Sam was on a roll. "You laughed at my pain! You were a terrible brother."
Sam was so busy shouting at Dean he didn't notice the ten-foot-tall woolly mammoth shuffling up behind him. He jumped when Mister Snuffleupagus put a comforting furry trunk on his shoulder. But he recovered and blinked quickly.
"It's okay," Sam said, patting Snuffie's trunk gently. "I always knew you were real. I believed in you."
"Son of a bitch," Dean said. "I still can't believe it."
"Him," Sam said with a nod. "He's a him. I can see him too."
"He's kind of hard to miss," Dean said.
Sam agreed. "Yes. So big."
"And furry."
"And... big." Dean thought it was a point worth reiterating.
"And who cares?" said Oscar, grouchily. "Stop crowding my alley! Go have your creepy hallucinations somewhere else."
Sam whirled around to glare at Oscar. "But he's not a hallucination," Sam said. "We've just proven it once and for all!"
"You're bothering Slimey," Oscar said. He banged on the side of his trash can. "You're too noisy and you're packing heat. We don't like people packing heat on this street."
"He's got a point," Sam pointed out. "This is supposed to be a kids' show."
"So now it's a family show with a loaded .45," Dean said. "Who the fuck cares?"
"Dean!" Sam snapped. "No cussing!"
"I'm not cussing!"
"You said 'fuck'!"
"Sam, I can't believe you just said 'fuck' on a kids' show!"
"You said it first!"
"Jeez-louise," Oscar said, shaking his head. "You two are worse than Bert and Ernie. Go back to your pad and kiss and give mutual blow-jobs and make-up already."
They both turned to stare at Oscar.
"Dude," Sam said, horrified. "You can't say that on a kids' show."
"Bite me," said Oscar. "Kids these days are tough. They know the score."
"Do they know Snuffie is real?" Dean asked.
Sam gaped at him.
"What?" Dean said. "It's important! You cried for three weeks when I tried to tell you Snuffie wasn't real!"
"It was like five minutes," Sam said, but the tips of his ears were turning red. "And I was four. And Snuffie is real!"
"I'm need popcorn for this," said Oscar. He pulled a crinkled, greasy microwave bag out of his trashcan. "Look at that! It's my lucky day."
"You lied to me, you asshole." Sam was on a roll. "You laughed at my pain! You were a terrible brother."
Sam was so busy shouting at Dean he didn't notice the ten-foot-tall woolly mammoth shuffling up behind him. He jumped when Mister Snuffleupagus put a comforting furry trunk on his shoulder. But he recovered and blinked quickly.
"It's okay," Sam said, patting Snuffie's trunk gently. "I always knew you were real. I believed in you."
"Son of a bitch," Dean said. "I still can't believe it."
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You two are worse than Bert and Ernie. Go back to your pad and kiss and give mutual blow-jobs and make-up already." WIN.
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I just...it's....
*hands*
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Poor Sammy!!
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(also? HAPPY BIRTHDAY!)
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