Clever Mischief Chapter 19: Distractions
Clever Mischief, Chapter 19: Distractions
Date: Saturday, October 1, 2005
Location: Library, Hogwarts
Character: Hermione
Rating: Any Age
It had been a busy week. Hermione didn’t dwell on the fact that it actually had been rather slow, work wise, and instead focused on all her many projects she’d started to occupy her time. After all, any improvements to her library were work related and considered productive in terms of her job performance.
It was now Saturday afternoon and she was up to her elbows in dust. For the first time in quite awhile, she hadn’t gone to Hogsmeade for breakfast. It had become such a routine over the years that she still felt a bit odd not to have started her day by eating at the Three Broomsticks and sharing conversation with Rosmerta. She had missed a few Saturdays over the past school years, though, due to various reasons so it was silly to dwell on the change in routine. Sometimes change was good, after all.
This morning, she had woken early after another restless night with little sleep and much tossing and turning to shower and dress in comfortable track pants and a comfortable shirt suitable for her plans. She had skipped breakfast, again, and gone straight to work. That had become her pattern during the previous week, it seemed. She’d barely left her library at all, finding comfort in the familiarity of books and the escape in the projects that took her mind off things she needed to stop thinking about.
After she returned from Hogsmeade last Saturday, she’d been confused and felt guilty about the kiss she’d shared with Fred. She’d been able to push it from her thoughts during her dinner with Harry and Ron, which had been very enjoyable and ended with the most delicious cake ever. The thoughts had come back to the forefront of her mind as soon as she’d returned home, though, and she’d realized they weren’t likely to just be pushed into a little compartment in her mind.
It was her fault, of course, for returning Fred’s kiss when she’d just kissed George a few days before and wasn’t sure about anything. The kiss from Fred had just made things even more complicated. If it had been an awful kiss or she had felt like she did when she brushed a kiss against Harry’s cheek, it would have cleared things up. That would have been too easy, though. Instead, she’d felt a fluttering in her tummy and warmth spreading over her body and she’d wanted more.
Perhaps she had just been alone too long. It had been awhile since Viktor and that might be why she’d responded to both George and Fred’s kisses, as neither had been the same yet they’d caused a similar intense reaction. She shouldn’t have kissed either of them, not when her feelings were unclear and especially not when she knew a relationship was pretty much impossible with anyone, much less one of them.
She didn’t feel guilty about the actual kisses because such a reaction would take away from how she felt about each individual kiss. However, she did feel guilty for letting herself get into this situation and for possibly alienating two men she considered friends and enjoyed having in her life. They’d know she’d kissed them both and would probably think she was some cheap slag who made a habit out of kissing attractive men and probably wouldn’t care that it had been years since she’d even felt an inclination to kiss anyone much less two people in the span of weeks. She wouldn’t doubt that they’d either be disgusted with her actions or choose not to have her around for some other reason.
Hermione frowned as she scrubbed the empty shelf before her. It was amazing how organization and cleaning could distract her from those thoughts. She had woken Sunday after a restless night’s sleep with the idea to clean the entire library. Such a task could be accomplished in an afternoon with a couple dozen charms, but she decided to clean the shelves the Muggle way so she’d not risk damaging the books. She had ignored Kingsley’s quizzical look when he’d reminded her that she always cleaned magically, and Neville had just offered to help since he had a free Sunday and cleaning was as enjoyable as sitting in his room.
The library had been thoroughly cleaned prior to the start of school so there wasn’t much dust to wipe away, but it gave her something to focus on and that made it worthwhile. Spray, scrub, wipe, dry. Spray, scrub, wipe, dry. That had become her routine during the hours she wasn’t doing her normal duties. She went to bed in the middle of the night so exhausted and worn out that she slept a few hours before she woke from odd dreams she couldn’t remember but always made her feel somewhat miserable, and only remembered to eat because food would end up on her desk around lunch time and dinner time.
Once she was finished with the library, she might ask Minerva if the unused classrooms on the third and fourth floor needed a good thorough cleaning. Then she’d ask Kingsley if she could clean the dungeons, as that would take a bit longer since not even the House Elves liked going down there much unless required. Cleaning the entire castle would keep her busy for months, probably, and that would hopefully be enough time for the complicated thoughts in her mind to clear up and start making sense.
She refused to acknowledge that she’d let this situation happen, that she’d developed a crush on Fred and had kissed George and then kissed Fred, and was now hiding from it in the way she hid from anything too emotional that scared her. The idea of Fred and George ending their friendship with her because of her foolish decisions kept her hidden in the library. If they didn’t see her, they’d have time to forget all about the kisses. Of course, they might not even have discussed a kiss they might have considered casual and meaningless with each other, in which case it was her own confusion over things that was making her believe they’d hate her.
Regardless, things were too complicated in her mind and she needed a distraction. True, she was somewhat cranky from not sleeping well, sore from doing so much cleaning, and probably wasn’t very pleasant to be around, but she didn’t let that interfere with her job and none of the students suffered from her moodiness. Really, only those closest to her would even suspect she was acting weird as she tended to have a reputation for being focused and doing things the Muggle way even when magic was quicker.
Hermione finished one shelf and moved to the next. Once she finished this section, she might take a short break and eat the lunch that Dobby had put on her desk earlier. She needed a bit of energy as she hoped to finish the next three sections on this wall before bed. She couldn’t help thinking of restless nights during the war when she’d spent hours cleaning the kitchen at Godric’s Hollow in order to avoid nightmares or thinking about everything that could go wrong or that had happened since she’d left Hogwarts.
Cleaning and organizing always worked as a good distraction for her and had since she was a child, which was probably further evidence that she was definitely nowhere near normal. She didn’t mind that, though, because normal wasn’t anything she’d ever particularly wanted to be. Distractions were good, especially at the moment. For now, she didn’t plan to go back to Hogsmeade or see the twins until she could be around them without thinking about crushes or kissing. If that required cleaning the entire castle, so be it.
Date: Saturday, October 1, 2005
Location: Library, Hogwarts
Character: Hermione
Rating: Any Age
It had been a busy week. Hermione didn’t dwell on the fact that it actually had been rather slow, work wise, and instead focused on all her many projects she’d started to occupy her time. After all, any improvements to her library were work related and considered productive in terms of her job performance.
It was now Saturday afternoon and she was up to her elbows in dust. For the first time in quite awhile, she hadn’t gone to Hogsmeade for breakfast. It had become such a routine over the years that she still felt a bit odd not to have started her day by eating at the Three Broomsticks and sharing conversation with Rosmerta. She had missed a few Saturdays over the past school years, though, due to various reasons so it was silly to dwell on the change in routine. Sometimes change was good, after all.
This morning, she had woken early after another restless night with little sleep and much tossing and turning to shower and dress in comfortable track pants and a comfortable shirt suitable for her plans. She had skipped breakfast, again, and gone straight to work. That had become her pattern during the previous week, it seemed. She’d barely left her library at all, finding comfort in the familiarity of books and the escape in the projects that took her mind off things she needed to stop thinking about.
After she returned from Hogsmeade last Saturday, she’d been confused and felt guilty about the kiss she’d shared with Fred. She’d been able to push it from her thoughts during her dinner with Harry and Ron, which had been very enjoyable and ended with the most delicious cake ever. The thoughts had come back to the forefront of her mind as soon as she’d returned home, though, and she’d realized they weren’t likely to just be pushed into a little compartment in her mind.
It was her fault, of course, for returning Fred’s kiss when she’d just kissed George a few days before and wasn’t sure about anything. The kiss from Fred had just made things even more complicated. If it had been an awful kiss or she had felt like she did when she brushed a kiss against Harry’s cheek, it would have cleared things up. That would have been too easy, though. Instead, she’d felt a fluttering in her tummy and warmth spreading over her body and she’d wanted more.
Perhaps she had just been alone too long. It had been awhile since Viktor and that might be why she’d responded to both George and Fred’s kisses, as neither had been the same yet they’d caused a similar intense reaction. She shouldn’t have kissed either of them, not when her feelings were unclear and especially not when she knew a relationship was pretty much impossible with anyone, much less one of them.
She didn’t feel guilty about the actual kisses because such a reaction would take away from how she felt about each individual kiss. However, she did feel guilty for letting herself get into this situation and for possibly alienating two men she considered friends and enjoyed having in her life. They’d know she’d kissed them both and would probably think she was some cheap slag who made a habit out of kissing attractive men and probably wouldn’t care that it had been years since she’d even felt an inclination to kiss anyone much less two people in the span of weeks. She wouldn’t doubt that they’d either be disgusted with her actions or choose not to have her around for some other reason.
Hermione frowned as she scrubbed the empty shelf before her. It was amazing how organization and cleaning could distract her from those thoughts. She had woken Sunday after a restless night’s sleep with the idea to clean the entire library. Such a task could be accomplished in an afternoon with a couple dozen charms, but she decided to clean the shelves the Muggle way so she’d not risk damaging the books. She had ignored Kingsley’s quizzical look when he’d reminded her that she always cleaned magically, and Neville had just offered to help since he had a free Sunday and cleaning was as enjoyable as sitting in his room.
The library had been thoroughly cleaned prior to the start of school so there wasn’t much dust to wipe away, but it gave her something to focus on and that made it worthwhile. Spray, scrub, wipe, dry. Spray, scrub, wipe, dry. That had become her routine during the hours she wasn’t doing her normal duties. She went to bed in the middle of the night so exhausted and worn out that she slept a few hours before she woke from odd dreams she couldn’t remember but always made her feel somewhat miserable, and only remembered to eat because food would end up on her desk around lunch time and dinner time.
Once she was finished with the library, she might ask Minerva if the unused classrooms on the third and fourth floor needed a good thorough cleaning. Then she’d ask Kingsley if she could clean the dungeons, as that would take a bit longer since not even the House Elves liked going down there much unless required. Cleaning the entire castle would keep her busy for months, probably, and that would hopefully be enough time for the complicated thoughts in her mind to clear up and start making sense.
She refused to acknowledge that she’d let this situation happen, that she’d developed a crush on Fred and had kissed George and then kissed Fred, and was now hiding from it in the way she hid from anything too emotional that scared her. The idea of Fred and George ending their friendship with her because of her foolish decisions kept her hidden in the library. If they didn’t see her, they’d have time to forget all about the kisses. Of course, they might not even have discussed a kiss they might have considered casual and meaningless with each other, in which case it was her own confusion over things that was making her believe they’d hate her.
Regardless, things were too complicated in her mind and she needed a distraction. True, she was somewhat cranky from not sleeping well, sore from doing so much cleaning, and probably wasn’t very pleasant to be around, but she didn’t let that interfere with her job and none of the students suffered from her moodiness. Really, only those closest to her would even suspect she was acting weird as she tended to have a reputation for being focused and doing things the Muggle way even when magic was quicker.
Hermione finished one shelf and moved to the next. Once she finished this section, she might take a short break and eat the lunch that Dobby had put on her desk earlier. She needed a bit of energy as she hoped to finish the next three sections on this wall before bed. She couldn’t help thinking of restless nights during the war when she’d spent hours cleaning the kitchen at Godric’s Hollow in order to avoid nightmares or thinking about everything that could go wrong or that had happened since she’d left Hogwarts.
Cleaning and organizing always worked as a good distraction for her and had since she was a child, which was probably further evidence that she was definitely nowhere near normal. She didn’t mind that, though, because normal wasn’t anything she’d ever particularly wanted to be. Distractions were good, especially at the moment. For now, she didn’t plan to go back to Hogsmeade or see the twins until she could be around them without thinking about crushes or kissing. If that required cleaning the entire castle, so be it.