This will hurt....
This day has been one filled with many things which have made me look back, look forward, and look inward. I know that most people who know me will say whats new... well thats just it, there is nothing new about all this, simply its never been said. For all of my efforts to think on other things my mind comes back to one central fact of my life, love. That feeling, abiltiy, aspect, trait, choice, need, whatever you wish to call it.
There have been many women throughout my life, some simply a brief touching, others a profound part of my existence. and here it is, for all the world to see.... including them.
Almost four years ago, I happened to post in a community and recieved a reply from an unknown person. I had no idea that this one post would introduce me to the greatest person I would meet in my life. within weeks we were continually commenting back and forth on each others post, finding a kindred spirit in our worlds so far apart. Finally we became friends and started im-ing one another chatting into the late hours about everything. Our hearts were laid bare as we shared our pains and sorrows from our past. eventually we started talking directly, with late night phone calls on advice and simple joking. with each new day I found myself looking forward to the moments I would be able to log on or pick up the phone to hear that voice. She became and still is my best friendmy truest rock. Because of her I found self worth and even a sense of honor I thought long gone. Even now I think of how truly beautiful she is, not merely in the physical, but in the spiritual. She gave me the strength to go on with each day, to see the beauty in this cold dark world. Inshort I learned to love, true love through her. I'd even say I fell in love with her, as though who know her would have to agree theres something about her that just makes you yern to be around her. Though I know it would never be I know a part of me will always love her as more tha just my friend, and because of it I will be a better man. So thank you M, your still my saving grace, my L.A. Angel. I only hope that we can renew our bonds to what they once were.
This past April, when I finally broke up with my long time obsession, I felt as though my life was either over, or to continue as it had been, as luck would have it, I found that which I had been missing all this time. Like a shot in the dark, the perfect woman for me pops into my life. As odd as it seemes when you do stop searching for it love does come find you. so now I'm with the one woman who completes me, who overlooks my many faults, and forgives my many errors. who woulda thought one of my favorite songs would be my favorite lady. I love her utterly. Everyday with her is seeing the world made new. and even though I'm still plauged by occasional burst of depression and saddness, it doesnt drag me down like it used to. So yes I do love this wonderful woman of mine, this amazing young lady whos utterly defeated me. and I cant wait to marry her.
There have been many women throughout my life, some simply a brief touching, others a profound part of my existence. and here it is, for all the world to see.... including them.
Click to viewAlmost four years ago, I happened to post in a community and recieved a reply from an unknown person. I had no idea that this one post would introduce me to the greatest person I would meet in my life. within weeks we were continually commenting back and forth on each others post, finding a kindred spirit in our worlds so far apart. Finally we became friends and started im-ing one another chatting into the late hours about everything. Our hearts were laid bare as we shared our pains and sorrows from our past. eventually we started talking directly, with late night phone calls on advice and simple joking. with each new day I found myself looking forward to the moments I would be able to log on or pick up the phone to hear that voice. She became and still is my best friendmy truest rock. Because of her I found self worth and even a sense of honor I thought long gone. Even now I think of how truly beautiful she is, not merely in the physical, but in the spiritual. She gave me the strength to go on with each day, to see the beauty in this cold dark world. Inshort I learned to love, true love through her. I'd even say I fell in love with her, as though who know her would have to agree theres something about her that just makes you yern to be around her. Though I know it would never be I know a part of me will always love her as more tha just my friend, and because of it I will be a better man. So thank you M, your still my saving grace, my L.A. Angel. I only hope that we can renew our bonds to what they once were.
This past April, when I finally broke up with my long time obsession, I felt as though my life was either over, or to continue as it had been, as luck would have it, I found that which I had been missing all this time. Like a shot in the dark, the perfect woman for me pops into my life. As odd as it seemes when you do stop searching for it love does come find you. so now I'm with the one woman who completes me, who overlooks my many faults, and forgives my many errors. who woulda thought one of my favorite songs would be my favorite lady. I love her utterly. Everyday with her is seeing the world made new. and even though I'm still plauged by occasional burst of depression and saddness, it doesnt drag me down like it used to. So yes I do love this wonderful woman of mine, this amazing young lady whos utterly defeated me. and I cant wait to marry her.