Spring has Sprung
Spring Has Sprung
And along with that sprungage comes a few notable changes in my life. First off, and most obvious to those around me, are my wonderful allergies. Thanks God! It's cool to put me on a planet that my body can't stand. Imagine, if you will, that the air you breath is infused with very fine, black pepper. Every breath you take is an irritant. Your eyes water and itch, and you sneeze every four minutes. Allergies are so boss!
But the real change that I wanted to write about is the clothes the girlies be wearin' when it gets warm got damn! I'm so glad I wasn't alive in the 50s or something when girls dressed like nuns all year round. Truly, I love the 21st century. As soon as it gets over 65 degrees, girls start advertising. 'Look, boys! I have firm boobies, and a tight ass!' Yes, girls. Some of you do, and thank you for showing me that. But wait, there is a downside. Some girls with a little more girth think they can dress the same way as their thinner counterparts. I'm sorry, my larger lovelies but no. Just because you have a belly, doesn't mean you should wear a belly shirt. It's not only unattractive, it's disrespectful to those of us with eyes. And don't think I'm some stuck up pig of a man. These rules work for us fellas too. If I walked around, showing my gut to the world, I'd kick my own ass. To sum this rant up:
Allergies make me angry at God
I really admire a nice, tight ass
Thin girls wear thin girl clothes, and thick girls wear thick girl clothes
And along with that sprungage comes a few notable changes in my life. First off, and most obvious to those around me, are my wonderful allergies. Thanks God! It's cool to put me on a planet that my body can't stand. Imagine, if you will, that the air you breath is infused with very fine, black pepper. Every breath you take is an irritant. Your eyes water and itch, and you sneeze every four minutes. Allergies are so boss!
But the real change that I wanted to write about is the clothes the girlies be wearin' when it gets warm got damn! I'm so glad I wasn't alive in the 50s or something when girls dressed like nuns all year round. Truly, I love the 21st century. As soon as it gets over 65 degrees, girls start advertising. 'Look, boys! I have firm boobies, and a tight ass!' Yes, girls. Some of you do, and thank you for showing me that. But wait, there is a downside. Some girls with a little more girth think they can dress the same way as their thinner counterparts. I'm sorry, my larger lovelies but no. Just because you have a belly, doesn't mean you should wear a belly shirt. It's not only unattractive, it's disrespectful to those of us with eyes. And don't think I'm some stuck up pig of a man. These rules work for us fellas too. If I walked around, showing my gut to the world, I'd kick my own ass. To sum this rant up:
Allergies make me angry at God
I really admire a nice, tight ass
Thin girls wear thin girl clothes, and thick girls wear thick girl clothes