And now I *flop*
First off, dollish news: Freakishly Lifelike Joker (With Extra Police Uniform) is available for pre-order and a January release! If you do want this, you may want to reserve yours now, because I think the previous version completely sold out.
THE LITTLEST BELLA IS IMMINENT. (Scroll to the end.) I am advised that she will be shipping next week, in fact. I think it'll take me a few entries to work her in, as I started planning for the worst (JULY, WTF), but I can adjust the story pretty quickly. (As previously mentioned, any and all spare Littlest Edwards will be used as doubles. I did the sorta-twin thing once; I don't think I can manage it again.)
MOAR DOLLS: My Little Ponies that might actually taste like candy; Tonner Warehouse Relocation Sale in NY; I have two things to say about the latest repaint here, and they are: 1) This is a very talented artist. 2) That shit ain't right. I don't even want to contemplate what the eventual owner might do with that.
A note about links to movie parodies, video and otherwise: I wanted to do Watchmen in Fifteen Minutes, but I never did because when I sat down, I just couldn't think of anything to say. And several weeks later, I realized it was because I had seen two or three really funny takes on the original book... so when I sat down to write, all that came to mind were their jokes. So from now on, I might link to parodies of movies I plan on writing about in the future if I happen to see them (the movie sites I watch often post them), but only for y'all to see them--if you specifically want me to watch them, well... it's not going to happen. I'm talking about parodies of things like X-Men/Wolverine, Star Trek, Terminator--all the summer movies, whichever if any I end up trying to write about, but also stuff later in the year. I mean, I'm sure parodists will eventually switch over from Twilight to New Moon, and I won't be able to look at those either. I barely look at them now, even the ones I link.
(I remember that I said to someone once that I couldn't read other people's parodies if I hadn't written my own yet, and whoever it was got really huffy about all the things I was "missing out on." You know what? If it's the only way I can keep doing my own thing, I'm pretty sure I'm okay with that sacrifice.)
ACTUAL LINKSPAM:
Stephen Fry's letter to himself: Dearest absurd child.
Poet Craig Arnold Disappears in Japan.
Girl fights off thugs with marching band baton ("The moral to this story is don't mess with the marching band girls, or you just might get what you deserve").
Which Actress Ruined a Picasso By Drunkenly Throwing a Wine Glass At It? [Blind Items]
Free Comic Book day this Saturday!
The Great Sci-Fi Divide: Why don't we want science fiction on TV?; What's Wrong With Science Fiction TV? [Rant]
Save Our Shows: The fans' choice is 'Chuck'; NBC's Website Freaks 'Chuck' Fans Out.
How 'Lost' Gets Made. Speaking of which: here's what was going on with the "What did you see?" bits during the show last night.
The Dollhouse Gets Down And Dirty In Unaired Post-Apocalyptic Episode.
Let 2.7 Million Trees Bloom: Disney to Make Good on "Earth" Planting Pledge.
Images: New Photo of Megan Fox in Transformers; Exclusive: 'Paper Heart' Poster Premiere; The Poster for McTeigue’s ‘Ninja Assassin’; Three Character Banners for Todd Phillips' 'The Hangover'; Exclusive Look at Jennifer Lynch's 'Surveillance'; Exclusive 'District 9' Photo.
Trailers and clips: New G.I. Joe Trailer Stuffed With Rockets, Suits, Nanomites And Other Splodey New Toys; 'Angels & Demons': Scene featuring Ewan McGregor; Trailer Debut for Nora Ephron's Summer Film 'Julie and Julia'; 'Blood: The Last Vampire' Trailer Premiere; First Three Minutes of 'Food, Inc.' Will Make You Hungry For More; Jessica Biel’s ‘Easy Virtue’: A Tribeca Film Festival Review (with clip); International Trailers Made for One Another: ‘Ponyo’ and ‘Antichrist.’
Sidenote: 'The Last Airbender' Teaser Trailer Attached to Transformers 2.
Box office preview: How big can 'Wolverine' get?; EXCLUSIVE: Hugh Jackman ‘Talking To Writers’ About ‘Wolverine’ Sequel Set In Japan; Everything You Wanted to Know About Wolverine But Were Afraid to Ask; Is Gambit The Most Anticipated Mutant To Debut In ‘X-Men Origins: Wolverine’?; ‘Wolverine’ Star Gambit Keeps It Cool - And Leaves Us Geeky; A ‘Deadpool’ Musical? Ryan Reynolds Talks Solo Spin-Off For ‘Wolverine’ Merc; Wolverine's Ryan Reynolds on swordplay and Deadpool; Will.i.am makes film debut in ‘Wolverine’; Check Out Dominic Monaghan As The Mutant ‘Bolt’ In New ‘X-Men Origins: Wolverine’ Scene!; Exclusive: Wolverine Director Gavin Hood; Hugh Jackman springs to life in sharply directed 'Wolverine'; Review: X-Men Origins: Wolverine isn't a triumph or a disaster-it's just OK; Jackman's 'Pimp' Fears (" 'Hey, my dad's Wolverine.' That's his opening line!"); $4300 on breakfast for fans at the Tempe premiere ("Customer: HUGH").
New Star Trek Pics Take You Back To Starfleet Academy; Don't blink! We unearth a few Star Trek easter eggs; Star Trek's J.J. Abrams on why Bana and Greenwood are key; Abrams: 'Shatner's Kirk Is Dead'; ‘Star Trek’ Star Zachary Quinto Touts Swine Flu Defense Strategy.
New Space Superstar Zoe Saldana Compares The Visions Of ‘Star Trek,’ Cameron's ‘Avatar’; Soderbergh on 'Avatar': "It's The Craziest Sh*t Ever!"
Christian Bale Admits He’s ‘In A Bit Of A Fix’ If Christopher Nolan Declines ‘Batman 3’; Why Isn't Jonathan Nolan Credited for 'Terminator Salvation'?
Exclusive: 'Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince' Character Banners!; New Bezoar Photo, Amycus Carrow, Greyback Wanted Posters from Half-Blood Prince; I See Sea Shells on Shell Cottage; Kloves on Adapting Harry Potter: "Books Are Difficult to Wrestle to the Screen"; "Paranoia" Core of Half-Blood Prince Story Says Dan Radcliffe; Emma Watson on "Mean Girl" Lavender Brown for Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince; Matt Lewis (Neville) talks about Rupert Grint's corpsing + some other stuff; Chicago exhibit welcomes Potter fans to Hogwarts. Behold! My college friend Marcus's report (with pictures) for Chicagoist!
Mike Newell is In Talks to Direct ‘The Lone Ranger.’
First 'Clash of the Titans' Set Photos; Danny Huston to Play Poseidon in 'Clash of the Titans.' Aw, I love him.
Cameron Bright Talks New Moon; Rob Pattinson in People’s 100 Most Beautiful People (I do not think this is going to improve his quality of life, tbh) (although can it really be worse than someone selling a customized doll that looks freakishly like him?); Emily Browning Addresses Her 'Twilight' Notoriety (How in the world is little Violet Baudelaire twenty? How is she older than Kristen Stewart?); Creation Entertainment Twilight Tour Schedule Updates; UCB Group Parodies ‘Twilight’ With Cheeseburgers.
(My mother reports that she spent most of her lunch meeting yesterday playing Horrify the Twilight Noob with an HR department that seemed completely unaware of the entire phenomenon, and she played it all the way down to "vampire C section." BRAVA.)
David Slade to Direct Killer Amphibians Flick 'Cold Skin.' After he directs 'Eclipse,' presumably, which I believe films sometime this fall/winter. Yes, Summit is insane.
Werewolves Found to Howl in 'Dead of Night.'
Katie Cassidy Cast in 'A Nightmare on Elm Street.'
Roger Donaldson to Direct ‘Thomas Crown Affair’ Circa 1911 ('The Day They Stole the Mona Lisa').
'Wall Street 2': Oliver Stone, Michael Douglas to return for sequel, Shia LaBeouf in talks.
The WTF Files: A Movie Called 'The Knight Watchmen'?
Eli Roth Dishes on His ‘Basterds’ Nazi Mini-Movie: ‘What Have I Done?’
Three More Action Projects Lined Up for Bruce Willis.
Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Rainn Wilson, and Natalie Portman in 'Hesher.'
Keanu Reeves in Talks for 'Cartagena,' Clive Owen is out.
EXCLUSIVE: Matthew McConaughey In ‘Loose’ Talks For ‘Dazed And Confused’ Sequel.
Wachowskis’ ‘Shaolin Cowboy’ And Joel Schumacher ‘SilverFish’ Adaptations Get Updates.
We Swing By The ‘Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark’ Auditions.
Kenneth Branagh Finally Shooting 'Thor' Next January?!
New Comic Book Movie Intentionally Forgetful ['The Forgotten'].
Jim Carrey’s ‘A Christmas Carol’ Will Leave You ‘Blown Away,’ Says Special Effects Master. Related: Robert Zemeckis Thinking of Bringing Roger Rabbit Back?
Will Ferrell, Adam McKay Producing ‘Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters.’
Gervais Playing Short, Fat, Sweaty Loser of His Made-Up Creature Book.
Catherine Zeta-Jones to play Susan Boyle in James Cameron-directed biopic? Not so fast, rumor-mongers.
When The Soap Opera Devil Possesses You, You Get Laser-Beam Eyes And Projectile Vomit [Found Footage]. "But by far the best bit comes around 7:55, when Marlena busts out the aforementioned laser eyes and face-spattering puke." I am so, so sad that this storyline was before my time.
THE LITTLEST BELLA IS IMMINENT. (Scroll to the end.) I am advised that she will be shipping next week, in fact. I think it'll take me a few entries to work her in, as I started planning for the worst (JULY, WTF), but I can adjust the story pretty quickly. (As previously mentioned, any and all spare Littlest Edwards will be used as doubles. I did the sorta-twin thing once; I don't think I can manage it again.)
MOAR DOLLS: My Little Ponies that might actually taste like candy; Tonner Warehouse Relocation Sale in NY; I have two things to say about the latest repaint here, and they are: 1) This is a very talented artist. 2) That shit ain't right. I don't even want to contemplate what the eventual owner might do with that.
A note about links to movie parodies, video and otherwise: I wanted to do Watchmen in Fifteen Minutes, but I never did because when I sat down, I just couldn't think of anything to say. And several weeks later, I realized it was because I had seen two or three really funny takes on the original book... so when I sat down to write, all that came to mind were their jokes. So from now on, I might link to parodies of movies I plan on writing about in the future if I happen to see them (the movie sites I watch often post them), but only for y'all to see them--if you specifically want me to watch them, well... it's not going to happen. I'm talking about parodies of things like X-Men/Wolverine, Star Trek, Terminator--all the summer movies, whichever if any I end up trying to write about, but also stuff later in the year. I mean, I'm sure parodists will eventually switch over from Twilight to New Moon, and I won't be able to look at those either. I barely look at them now, even the ones I link.
(I remember that I said to someone once that I couldn't read other people's parodies if I hadn't written my own yet, and whoever it was got really huffy about all the things I was "missing out on." You know what? If it's the only way I can keep doing my own thing, I'm pretty sure I'm okay with that sacrifice.)
ACTUAL LINKSPAM:
Stephen Fry's letter to himself: Dearest absurd child.
Poet Craig Arnold Disappears in Japan.
Girl fights off thugs with marching band baton ("The moral to this story is don't mess with the marching band girls, or you just might get what you deserve").
Which Actress Ruined a Picasso By Drunkenly Throwing a Wine Glass At It? [Blind Items]
Free Comic Book day this Saturday!
The Great Sci-Fi Divide: Why don't we want science fiction on TV?; What's Wrong With Science Fiction TV? [Rant]
Save Our Shows: The fans' choice is 'Chuck'; NBC's Website Freaks 'Chuck' Fans Out.
How 'Lost' Gets Made. Speaking of which: here's what was going on with the "What did you see?" bits during the show last night.
The Dollhouse Gets Down And Dirty In Unaired Post-Apocalyptic Episode.
Let 2.7 Million Trees Bloom: Disney to Make Good on "Earth" Planting Pledge.
Images: New Photo of Megan Fox in Transformers; Exclusive: 'Paper Heart' Poster Premiere; The Poster for McTeigue’s ‘Ninja Assassin’; Three Character Banners for Todd Phillips' 'The Hangover'; Exclusive Look at Jennifer Lynch's 'Surveillance'; Exclusive 'District 9' Photo.
Trailers and clips: New G.I. Joe Trailer Stuffed With Rockets, Suits, Nanomites And Other Splodey New Toys; 'Angels & Demons': Scene featuring Ewan McGregor; Trailer Debut for Nora Ephron's Summer Film 'Julie and Julia'; 'Blood: The Last Vampire' Trailer Premiere; First Three Minutes of 'Food, Inc.' Will Make You Hungry For More; Jessica Biel’s ‘Easy Virtue’: A Tribeca Film Festival Review (with clip); International Trailers Made for One Another: ‘Ponyo’ and ‘Antichrist.’
Sidenote: 'The Last Airbender' Teaser Trailer Attached to Transformers 2.
Box office preview: How big can 'Wolverine' get?; EXCLUSIVE: Hugh Jackman ‘Talking To Writers’ About ‘Wolverine’ Sequel Set In Japan; Everything You Wanted to Know About Wolverine But Were Afraid to Ask; Is Gambit The Most Anticipated Mutant To Debut In ‘X-Men Origins: Wolverine’?; ‘Wolverine’ Star Gambit Keeps It Cool - And Leaves Us Geeky; A ‘Deadpool’ Musical? Ryan Reynolds Talks Solo Spin-Off For ‘Wolverine’ Merc; Wolverine's Ryan Reynolds on swordplay and Deadpool; Will.i.am makes film debut in ‘Wolverine’; Check Out Dominic Monaghan As The Mutant ‘Bolt’ In New ‘X-Men Origins: Wolverine’ Scene!; Exclusive: Wolverine Director Gavin Hood; Hugh Jackman springs to life in sharply directed 'Wolverine'; Review: X-Men Origins: Wolverine isn't a triumph or a disaster-it's just OK; Jackman's 'Pimp' Fears (" 'Hey, my dad's Wolverine.' That's his opening line!"); $4300 on breakfast for fans at the Tempe premiere ("Customer: HUGH").
New Star Trek Pics Take You Back To Starfleet Academy; Don't blink! We unearth a few Star Trek easter eggs; Star Trek's J.J. Abrams on why Bana and Greenwood are key; Abrams: 'Shatner's Kirk Is Dead'; ‘Star Trek’ Star Zachary Quinto Touts Swine Flu Defense Strategy.
New Space Superstar Zoe Saldana Compares The Visions Of ‘Star Trek,’ Cameron's ‘Avatar’; Soderbergh on 'Avatar': "It's The Craziest Sh*t Ever!"
Christian Bale Admits He’s ‘In A Bit Of A Fix’ If Christopher Nolan Declines ‘Batman 3’; Why Isn't Jonathan Nolan Credited for 'Terminator Salvation'?
Exclusive: 'Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince' Character Banners!; New Bezoar Photo, Amycus Carrow, Greyback Wanted Posters from Half-Blood Prince; I See Sea Shells on Shell Cottage; Kloves on Adapting Harry Potter: "Books Are Difficult to Wrestle to the Screen"; "Paranoia" Core of Half-Blood Prince Story Says Dan Radcliffe; Emma Watson on "Mean Girl" Lavender Brown for Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince; Matt Lewis (Neville) talks about Rupert Grint's corpsing + some other stuff; Chicago exhibit welcomes Potter fans to Hogwarts. Behold! My college friend Marcus's report (with pictures) for Chicagoist!
Mike Newell is In Talks to Direct ‘The Lone Ranger.’
First 'Clash of the Titans' Set Photos; Danny Huston to Play Poseidon in 'Clash of the Titans.' Aw, I love him.
Cameron Bright Talks New Moon; Rob Pattinson in People’s 100 Most Beautiful People (I do not think this is going to improve his quality of life, tbh) (although can it really be worse than someone selling a customized doll that looks freakishly like him?); Emily Browning Addresses Her 'Twilight' Notoriety (How in the world is little Violet Baudelaire twenty? How is she older than Kristen Stewart?); Creation Entertainment Twilight Tour Schedule Updates; UCB Group Parodies ‘Twilight’ With Cheeseburgers.
(My mother reports that she spent most of her lunch meeting yesterday playing Horrify the Twilight Noob with an HR department that seemed completely unaware of the entire phenomenon, and she played it all the way down to "vampire C section." BRAVA.)
David Slade to Direct Killer Amphibians Flick 'Cold Skin.' After he directs 'Eclipse,' presumably, which I believe films sometime this fall/winter. Yes, Summit is insane.
Werewolves Found to Howl in 'Dead of Night.'
Katie Cassidy Cast in 'A Nightmare on Elm Street.'
Roger Donaldson to Direct ‘Thomas Crown Affair’ Circa 1911 ('The Day They Stole the Mona Lisa').
'Wall Street 2': Oliver Stone, Michael Douglas to return for sequel, Shia LaBeouf in talks.
The WTF Files: A Movie Called 'The Knight Watchmen'?
Eli Roth Dishes on His ‘Basterds’ Nazi Mini-Movie: ‘What Have I Done?’
Three More Action Projects Lined Up for Bruce Willis.
Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Rainn Wilson, and Natalie Portman in 'Hesher.'
Keanu Reeves in Talks for 'Cartagena,' Clive Owen is out.
EXCLUSIVE: Matthew McConaughey In ‘Loose’ Talks For ‘Dazed And Confused’ Sequel.
Wachowskis’ ‘Shaolin Cowboy’ And Joel Schumacher ‘SilverFish’ Adaptations Get Updates.
We Swing By The ‘Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark’ Auditions.
Kenneth Branagh Finally Shooting 'Thor' Next January?!
New Comic Book Movie Intentionally Forgetful ['The Forgotten'].
Jim Carrey’s ‘A Christmas Carol’ Will Leave You ‘Blown Away,’ Says Special Effects Master. Related: Robert Zemeckis Thinking of Bringing Roger Rabbit Back?
Will Ferrell, Adam McKay Producing ‘Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters.’
Gervais Playing Short, Fat, Sweaty Loser of His Made-Up Creature Book.
Catherine Zeta-Jones to play Susan Boyle in James Cameron-directed biopic? Not so fast, rumor-mongers.
When The Soap Opera Devil Possesses You, You Get Laser-Beam Eyes And Projectile Vomit [Found Footage]. "But by far the best bit comes around 7:55, when Marlena busts out the aforementioned laser eyes and face-spattering puke." I am so, so sad that this storyline was before my time.