'Do an insult track, we need it for radio play!'
WHAT THE SHIT? How is it that I can do so well on my report card and still feel like an idiot most of the time? Anyway, I apparently don't speak Spanish, so I get an 88. But I have a Romanian Spanish teacher, so I deserve a 95. My math teacher and my mom are pregnant. I don't know whether to offer to tie her shoelaces for more points, or to cry. But I got a 92 on my last math test, so I have a good feeling about crossing the 90 line, and my parents loving me again.
"Sometimes you say stupid things, Sarrah."
I recently started reading Plato's Republic, right after I finished Dostoevsky's Crime and Punishment. I'm stuck in a rut: the next books on my list are Tolstoy's War and Peace, Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice, and one of Madonna's children's books. The most interesting-sounding one is The Little Caterpillar and his Adventures in the Big Dark Tunnel. I'm pretty sure that's what it's called.
I asked my Romanian Spanish teacher if she was on the same boat as Arnold Schwarzenegger when she came to America.
"I came on an airplane," she said.
The school newspaper's not putting it in.