Happy 33rd Birthday, to me!! :)
[aka Am I old yet?]
It's hard for me to think of how old I am, actually. I still get ID'd in the liquor stores and everywhere I go, in fact. This might not be such a big deal in the States where the legal drinking age is 21, but it is 19 in Canada!! :P (Don't they see the grey hairs? no, really :P)
When we first started dating, Magik started to ask me what I liked to do for my birthday. "Nothing," I told him. "I don't like to celebrate my birthday."
Really, I've talked about it here before... The only thing I like to do is call my mom and tell her Thank You, actually. I always try to think of her on my birthday because, really, what did I do? This is really just an annual celebration of the many hours of labour that she endured so that may be alive today.
I dunno... I understand it's something that guys like to do for the girl in their life, kind of like paying for everything. I hate it. But I let them do it. I recognized that although I would just like it to pass over as a non-affair, I think it's really more for Magik than myself. He likes doing these sorts of things for me. It's like an expression of his love... so I let him take me to Vij's.
It's crazy how although I haven't dated anyone seriously in close to 5 years, I am still so much more comfortable in a relationship than not. It's amazing how easy it is to fall into these patterns of dating with him. Commitment-phobe Clara gets a wee bit freaked out and cannot really talk about things like what sort of car I would like to get next (because, really... let's be honest. It all depends if I have a kid or not then! :P) It's just so easy for him to talk of spending the years together, which I like about him. It's really refreshing how he doesn't need to play it cool or play any games. He is just with me and totally into me. But although I am head over heels with him and he makes me feel that intensity of feeling which I thought I could never feel again, I cannot talk about spending my future with him. Especially to him.
This weekend has been slightly different from our other weekends spent together. It was a pretty chill weekend and we didn't have anything crazy planned, but I rather liked it that way. It kind of gave me a glimpse into our future life together, running errands, going to Costco and Future Shop and Walmart. We finished the Game of Thrones puzzle (but just the first layer!) and played Settlers of Catan together (his birthday gift to me). We have this healthy competition thing going on and I had so much fun butting heads with him and strategizing on how to win. Magik is so nice... it's almost deceiving because he is quite the fierce competitor! I don't think I have ever felt this challenged in my life :) If I said that Mr Almost had a sedating effect on me, I would say that Magik has a rather energizing effect on me in contrast. He says I bring out the best in him but I think it's our effect on each other. Ok, I'm going to be mushy and say this, but it's true! He brings out the best in me too. :)
Ok I'm going to stop here before I dissolve into a puddle of mush! :)
It's hard for me to think of how old I am, actually. I still get ID'd in the liquor stores and everywhere I go, in fact. This might not be such a big deal in the States where the legal drinking age is 21, but it is 19 in Canada!! :P (Don't they see the grey hairs? no, really :P)
When we first started dating, Magik started to ask me what I liked to do for my birthday. "Nothing," I told him. "I don't like to celebrate my birthday."
Really, I've talked about it here before... The only thing I like to do is call my mom and tell her Thank You, actually. I always try to think of her on my birthday because, really, what did I do? This is really just an annual celebration of the many hours of labour that she endured so that may be alive today.
I dunno... I understand it's something that guys like to do for the girl in their life, kind of like paying for everything. I hate it. But I let them do it. I recognized that although I would just like it to pass over as a non-affair, I think it's really more for Magik than myself. He likes doing these sorts of things for me. It's like an expression of his love... so I let him take me to Vij's.
It's crazy how although I haven't dated anyone seriously in close to 5 years, I am still so much more comfortable in a relationship than not. It's amazing how easy it is to fall into these patterns of dating with him. Commitment-phobe Clara gets a wee bit freaked out and cannot really talk about things like what sort of car I would like to get next (because, really... let's be honest. It all depends if I have a kid or not then! :P) It's just so easy for him to talk of spending the years together, which I like about him. It's really refreshing how he doesn't need to play it cool or play any games. He is just with me and totally into me. But although I am head over heels with him and he makes me feel that intensity of feeling which I thought I could never feel again, I cannot talk about spending my future with him. Especially to him.
This weekend has been slightly different from our other weekends spent together. It was a pretty chill weekend and we didn't have anything crazy planned, but I rather liked it that way. It kind of gave me a glimpse into our future life together, running errands, going to Costco and Future Shop and Walmart. We finished the Game of Thrones puzzle (but just the first layer!) and played Settlers of Catan together (his birthday gift to me). We have this healthy competition thing going on and I had so much fun butting heads with him and strategizing on how to win. Magik is so nice... it's almost deceiving because he is quite the fierce competitor! I don't think I have ever felt this challenged in my life :) If I said that Mr Almost had a sedating effect on me, I would say that Magik has a rather energizing effect on me in contrast. He says I bring out the best in him but I think it's our effect on each other. Ok, I'm going to be mushy and say this, but it's true! He brings out the best in me too. :)
Ok I'm going to stop here before I dissolve into a puddle of mush! :)