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well i tomorrow im going to ventura for a week, but im not for sure cuz im really feeling like shit, feverish that is. after the week from ventura im going to apply at home depot, i believe im clean already hopefully. im deciding either to take the semester of from bc so i can make some money so i can start moving out of the house or for a car, but really how many times have i said that?? maybe about 20 times, doesnt matter thou im still young im going to turn 21 in a couple of months but now i think of it i really dont think im that ready to be consider an adult. i mean once you hit that point you really cant make any mistakes like paying taxes, bills etc. but all i need to know is that i want to go to mexico and visit my grandparents and the rest of my family before i start my own life. cuz i know that this summer maybe the last for the opportunity to travel around california and maybe around the world(who em i kidding) but the fact is its time to be a reasponsible person than party all the time and get drunk. i havent been smoking cigs alot lately, nor craving thankfully, and i only drink over the weekend, but not truly get drunk. i just havent been being myself lately i guess. but im just sick and tire of living here in bakersfield, who doesnt? but i need to have a really good education or tranfer job to get out of here. time well tell