Funny, but true
So, tonight I was working and this asshole supervisor guy who takes the job way to seriously decides to hang out on my side of the building for a bit. He looks like the typical nerd who would spend weekends reading Plato's Republic and want to discuss it in full detail.( just to note : this shouldn't happen because I work south side and the supervisor is supposed to stay on the north side ) But he decides to talk to me anyway. Turns out tonight he brought a joke book down with him. "Pretty Funny Jokes" it was called. I knew what was coming, but I didn't know any good way to stop it without just flat out telling him to leave.
So, he sits down and starts telling me jokes. Now, I think it's pretty safe to assume that on the scale of "Funny" joke-book humor rates somewhere around "This sucks balls." Turns out that this kid enjoys these books more than any other kind of humor. This rates him at the top of the pecking-order for "Kids who thing they are hilarious, but should just fucking shut up."
I honestly couldn't see the facination in any of the jokes.
One that he told me went something like this : ( and understand that he told it because I was doing electrical engineering homework )
"A scientist, a physicist, and an engineer are given a red rubber ball and told to find its value. The scientist computes its diameter. The physicist drops it in water and finds its density. The engineer looks it up in 'The Red Rubber Ball Index.'"
That's it. That's the joke. I understand what it's trying to say. I also understand that there is nothing funny about it.
I didn't laugh. I didn't even give him a polite smile. I simply grunted in assent that something had been said. He kept telling the jokes.
After a few more I had to say something. So I go, "I've really got to focus on this homework and I don't really want to hear any jokes."
Instead of taking the hint and leaving, like any normal would, or at least shutting up, he continues talking. "Whenever I have trouble with problems, I find it helps to talk about what I can use to solve them." Then he starts saying things that he knows about circuits that have nothing to do with the problems I'm doing.
After a while I had to stop this so I go, "I really don't want to talk at all because I have to get this done."
He takes that not-so-subtle hint and leaves. For about 30 minutes.
This time he comes back and says, "How is the homework coming?"
I respond, "Pretty slow. It's taken me about a half hour to do one problem."
So he says, "Better coming slow than not coming at all."
I had to say something here to show him what real humor is.
I burst out with, "THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID."
He just sorta stared at me for a bit with that look in his eye; the little like that people get when they don't know what something is, but they really want to seem like they do. He finally says, "You mean a girl who just came through the door said that?"
That's when it dawned on me. He had no idea about the joke I had just made. I didn't think this was even possible. I had to ask him about it. He had never heard that phrase used before. Even when I told him it was a joke he didn't pick up on the meaning until I pointed it out.
All I can say to that. WTF.
End of Segment
Later in the night Nate and Andy Chen were down at the desk hanging out with me. Nate was playing guitar.
The guy walks back in and sees the guitar and goes, "Hey! Entertainment!"
He then proceeds to do what can only be loosely refered to as a dance. It was more along the lines of the shambling that those monkies do for men with organ grinders. He sorta bent his arms down and had his palms up and was jumping from one foot to the other in time with the music.
As Nate slowely stopped playing, he slowed down and finally stopped dancing. Then he stood there staring blankly, said something, and left for good.
I don't know where these people come from. I don't want to know. I don't want to hear jokes from them. I want them to leave me alone. Sad thing is that if he isn't there then he'll be replaced by any number of drunken people who want to sit about talk.
As a side note, a girl wanted to check out a loaner key from the desk. In order to do this a person needs to know their mother's maiden name. I ask her to tell me her mother's maiden name. She is drunk and sorta sways there thinking for a second, and then blurts out, "SPARKS!"
-baxter down
a little less than a happy high