Bibedi babedi boo!
After careful consideration and many sleepless night's, here's what I've decided. There's no such thing as grown-up. We move on, we move out, we move away from our families and form our own. But the basic insecurities, the basic fears and all those old wounds just grow up with us. And just when we think like and circumstances have forced us truly to become and adult, your mother say's something like that. Or worse! We get bigger, we get taller, we get older. But for the most part, we're still a bunch of kids, running around the playground, trying to desperately to fit in.
Cause I've heard that it's possible to grow up, I've just never met anyone who's actually done it. Without parents to defy, we break the rules we make for ourselves. We throw tantrums when things don't go our way. We whisper secrets with our best friend, in the dark. We look for comfort where we can find it. And we hope against all logic, against all experience, like children, we never give up hope!
And you know sometimes we are like children. They make decisions really fast. Face it, sometimes even the best of us make rash decisions. Bad decisions. Decisions we pretty much know we're going to regret the moment, the minute, especially the morning after. I mean, maybe not regret, regret because at least, you know, we put ourselves out there. But.... still. Something inside us decides to do a crazy thing. A thing we know we will probably turn around and bite us in the ass. Yet, we do it anyway. What i'm saying is, we reap what we sow. What comes around goes around. It's karma! And any way you slice it, KARMA SUCKS! Cause no way you look at it, karma will leave us to face ourselves. We can look our karma in the eye or we can wait for it to sneak up on us from behind. One way or another, our karma will always find us. And the truth is, no matter how hard we try we can't escape our karma. It follows us home. I guess we can't really complain about our karma. It's not unfair, it's not unexpected. It just.... evens the score. And even when we're about to do something we know, will tempt karma to bite us in the ass. Well, it goes without saying. We do it anyway.
So here is something that i have been thinking of. Have you ever thought that life is just like a game? But yet it's not a sport. Win, lose or draw and the game is on. So go ahead. Argue with the ref, change the rules, cheat a little, take a break and tend to your wounds. But PLAY, PLAY, PLAY! Play hard, play fast, play loose and free. Play as if there's no tomorrow. It's not about whether you lose or win, but it's about how you play the game! When you are playing the game, you have to understand that nothing comes without a price to pay. There we have the karma that will always bite us in the ass. A wise man said once :
"You can have anything in life if you're willing to sacrifice everything else for it".
What he actually meant is that nothing comes without a price to pay. So before you are going to start and play the game, you better decide how much you're willing to lose. Too often going after what feels good means letting go of what you know is right. And letting someone in, means abandoning the walls you've spent a lifetime building. Ofcourse the toughest sacrifices are the ones we don't see coming. When we don't have time to come up with a strategy to pick sides... or to measure the potential loss. When that happens, when the battle chooses us, and not the other way around, that's when the sacrifice can turn out to be more than we can bear.
And because of that we're all damaged in our own way. Some of us, more than the others. We carry the damage with us from childhood, then as grownups, we give as good as we get. Ultimately, we all do damage. And then? We set about the business of fixing whatever we can. Because of all that people get scars. In all sorts of unexpected places. Like secret road maps of their personal histories. Diagrams of all there old wounds. Most of our wounds heal, leaving nothing behind but a scar. But some of them don't! Some wounds we carry with us everywhere and though the cut's long gone, the pain still lingers. But do you ever what is more worse? New wounds which are horribly painful or old wounds that should've healed years ago, but it never did? We are not talking about physical wounds here but emotional. Maybe the old wounds teach us something? They remind us where we've been and what we've overcome. They teach us lessons about what to avoid in the future. That's what we like to think. But that's not the way it always goes, is it? Some things we jsut have to learn over and oaver and over again. Not all wounds are superficial. most wounds run deeper than you can imagine. You can't see them with the nakes eye. And then there are the wounds that take us by surprise. The trick with any kind of wound is to dig down and find the real source of pain - and once you've found it, try like hell to heal that sucker!
In life we are taught that there are seven deadly sins right?
Lust (Luxuria)
Gluttony (Gula)
Greed (Avaritia)
Sloth (Acedia)
Wrath (Ira)
Envy (Invidia)
Pride (Superbia)
We know that the biggest ones out of them are : Gluttony (Gula), Pride (Superbia), Lust (Luxuria). But the thing you don't hear much about is Anger. Maybe it's because we think anger is not that dangerous, that you can control it. My point is, maybe we don't give anger enough credit. Maybe it can be a lot more dangerous than we think. After all, when it comes to destructive behavior, it DID made the top seven. I mean think about it. What makes anger different from the six other sins? It's pretty simple really, you give into a sin like Envy (Invidia) or Pride (Superbia) and you only hurt yourself. Try Lust (Luxuria) or coveting and you'll only hurt yourself and one or two others. But Wrath (Ira), anger is the worst! The mother of all sins! Not only can anger drive you over the edge, when it does. You can take an awful lot of people with you!
So lemme ask you a question. Don't you think sometimes about the time when you were a little child and before you went to bed your mom or dad would read you a story? You know those bed time stories of our childhood? The shoe fit Cinderella, the frog was turned into a prince, sleeping beauty was awakened with a kiss? The once upon a time and they lived happily ever after? FAIRY TALES! The stuff of dreams. There is just one problem. Life isn't a fairytale! It's the other stories, you know the ones that start in a dark and stormy nights and end up in the unspeakable. The nightmares always seem to become the reality. But don't you think that reality is WAY better than having a happy ending? Life dares you to life, it's much murkier, much more scarier cause you don't know what is going to happen the next day. It's SO much more interesting than living in happily ever after. Don't get me wrong dreaming is good. Fantasy is good and simple to. Pleasure is good, and twice as much pleasure is better. That pain is bad, and no pain is better. But the reality is different. The reality is that pain is there to tell us something, and there's only so much pleasure we can take without getting a stomach ache. And maybe that's okay. Maybe some fantasies are only supposed to live in our dreams. But maybe we accept that the dream has become a nightmare. We tell ourselves that reality is better. We convince ourselves it's better that we never dream at all. But, the strongest of us, the most determined of us, holds on to the dream or we find ourselves faced with a fresh dream we never considered. We wake to find ourselves, against all odds, feeling hopeful! And, if we're lucky, we realize in the face of everything, in the face of life the true dream! The true dream is being able to dream AT ALL!
But hey! We all want that at the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. So this thing where we all keep our distance and pretend not to care about each other, it's usually a load of bull. So we pick and choose who we want to reamin close to, and once we've chosen those people, we tend to stick close by. No matter how much we hurt them. The people that are still with you at the end of the day, THOSE are the ones worth keeping. And sure, sometimes close can be too close. But sometimes, that invasion of personal space, it can be exactly what you need!
Gratitude, appreciation, giving thanks. No matter what words you use, they all mean the same thing. Happy! We're supposed to be happy. Grateful for friends, family. Happy just to be alive. Whether we like it or not!
Just getting back to the fairy tale thing. You know when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales? That fantasy of what your life would be - white dress, prince charming who'd carry you away to a castle on a hill. You'd lie in your bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, prince charming - they were so close you could taste them. But eventually you grow up and one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is, it's hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely because almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope and faith that oen day they would open their eye and it would all come true.
But at the end of the day, faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don't really expect it. It's like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And it's not so important, happy ever after, just that it's happy right now. See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you, and once in a while people may even take your breath away!
That's all for now.
Love all of you,
Lc~
Cause I've heard that it's possible to grow up, I've just never met anyone who's actually done it. Without parents to defy, we break the rules we make for ourselves. We throw tantrums when things don't go our way. We whisper secrets with our best friend, in the dark. We look for comfort where we can find it. And we hope against all logic, against all experience, like children, we never give up hope!
And you know sometimes we are like children. They make decisions really fast. Face it, sometimes even the best of us make rash decisions. Bad decisions. Decisions we pretty much know we're going to regret the moment, the minute, especially the morning after. I mean, maybe not regret, regret because at least, you know, we put ourselves out there. But.... still. Something inside us decides to do a crazy thing. A thing we know we will probably turn around and bite us in the ass. Yet, we do it anyway. What i'm saying is, we reap what we sow. What comes around goes around. It's karma! And any way you slice it, KARMA SUCKS! Cause no way you look at it, karma will leave us to face ourselves. We can look our karma in the eye or we can wait for it to sneak up on us from behind. One way or another, our karma will always find us. And the truth is, no matter how hard we try we can't escape our karma. It follows us home. I guess we can't really complain about our karma. It's not unfair, it's not unexpected. It just.... evens the score. And even when we're about to do something we know, will tempt karma to bite us in the ass. Well, it goes without saying. We do it anyway.
So here is something that i have been thinking of. Have you ever thought that life is just like a game? But yet it's not a sport. Win, lose or draw and the game is on. So go ahead. Argue with the ref, change the rules, cheat a little, take a break and tend to your wounds. But PLAY, PLAY, PLAY! Play hard, play fast, play loose and free. Play as if there's no tomorrow. It's not about whether you lose or win, but it's about how you play the game! When you are playing the game, you have to understand that nothing comes without a price to pay. There we have the karma that will always bite us in the ass. A wise man said once :
"You can have anything in life if you're willing to sacrifice everything else for it".
What he actually meant is that nothing comes without a price to pay. So before you are going to start and play the game, you better decide how much you're willing to lose. Too often going after what feels good means letting go of what you know is right. And letting someone in, means abandoning the walls you've spent a lifetime building. Ofcourse the toughest sacrifices are the ones we don't see coming. When we don't have time to come up with a strategy to pick sides... or to measure the potential loss. When that happens, when the battle chooses us, and not the other way around, that's when the sacrifice can turn out to be more than we can bear.
And because of that we're all damaged in our own way. Some of us, more than the others. We carry the damage with us from childhood, then as grownups, we give as good as we get. Ultimately, we all do damage. And then? We set about the business of fixing whatever we can. Because of all that people get scars. In all sorts of unexpected places. Like secret road maps of their personal histories. Diagrams of all there old wounds. Most of our wounds heal, leaving nothing behind but a scar. But some of them don't! Some wounds we carry with us everywhere and though the cut's long gone, the pain still lingers. But do you ever what is more worse? New wounds which are horribly painful or old wounds that should've healed years ago, but it never did? We are not talking about physical wounds here but emotional. Maybe the old wounds teach us something? They remind us where we've been and what we've overcome. They teach us lessons about what to avoid in the future. That's what we like to think. But that's not the way it always goes, is it? Some things we jsut have to learn over and oaver and over again. Not all wounds are superficial. most wounds run deeper than you can imagine. You can't see them with the nakes eye. And then there are the wounds that take us by surprise. The trick with any kind of wound is to dig down and find the real source of pain - and once you've found it, try like hell to heal that sucker!
In life we are taught that there are seven deadly sins right?
Lust (Luxuria)
Gluttony (Gula)
Greed (Avaritia)
Sloth (Acedia)
Wrath (Ira)
Envy (Invidia)
Pride (Superbia)
We know that the biggest ones out of them are : Gluttony (Gula), Pride (Superbia), Lust (Luxuria). But the thing you don't hear much about is Anger. Maybe it's because we think anger is not that dangerous, that you can control it. My point is, maybe we don't give anger enough credit. Maybe it can be a lot more dangerous than we think. After all, when it comes to destructive behavior, it DID made the top seven. I mean think about it. What makes anger different from the six other sins? It's pretty simple really, you give into a sin like Envy (Invidia) or Pride (Superbia) and you only hurt yourself. Try Lust (Luxuria) or coveting and you'll only hurt yourself and one or two others. But Wrath (Ira), anger is the worst! The mother of all sins! Not only can anger drive you over the edge, when it does. You can take an awful lot of people with you!
So lemme ask you a question. Don't you think sometimes about the time when you were a little child and before you went to bed your mom or dad would read you a story? You know those bed time stories of our childhood? The shoe fit Cinderella, the frog was turned into a prince, sleeping beauty was awakened with a kiss? The once upon a time and they lived happily ever after? FAIRY TALES! The stuff of dreams. There is just one problem. Life isn't a fairytale! It's the other stories, you know the ones that start in a dark and stormy nights and end up in the unspeakable. The nightmares always seem to become the reality. But don't you think that reality is WAY better than having a happy ending? Life dares you to life, it's much murkier, much more scarier cause you don't know what is going to happen the next day. It's SO much more interesting than living in happily ever after. Don't get me wrong dreaming is good. Fantasy is good and simple to. Pleasure is good, and twice as much pleasure is better. That pain is bad, and no pain is better. But the reality is different. The reality is that pain is there to tell us something, and there's only so much pleasure we can take without getting a stomach ache. And maybe that's okay. Maybe some fantasies are only supposed to live in our dreams. But maybe we accept that the dream has become a nightmare. We tell ourselves that reality is better. We convince ourselves it's better that we never dream at all. But, the strongest of us, the most determined of us, holds on to the dream or we find ourselves faced with a fresh dream we never considered. We wake to find ourselves, against all odds, feeling hopeful! And, if we're lucky, we realize in the face of everything, in the face of life the true dream! The true dream is being able to dream AT ALL!
But hey! We all want that at the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. So this thing where we all keep our distance and pretend not to care about each other, it's usually a load of bull. So we pick and choose who we want to reamin close to, and once we've chosen those people, we tend to stick close by. No matter how much we hurt them. The people that are still with you at the end of the day, THOSE are the ones worth keeping. And sure, sometimes close can be too close. But sometimes, that invasion of personal space, it can be exactly what you need!
Gratitude, appreciation, giving thanks. No matter what words you use, they all mean the same thing. Happy! We're supposed to be happy. Grateful for friends, family. Happy just to be alive. Whether we like it or not!
Just getting back to the fairy tale thing. You know when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales? That fantasy of what your life would be - white dress, prince charming who'd carry you away to a castle on a hill. You'd lie in your bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, prince charming - they were so close you could taste them. But eventually you grow up and one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is, it's hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely because almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope and faith that oen day they would open their eye and it would all come true.
But at the end of the day, faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don't really expect it. It's like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And it's not so important, happy ever after, just that it's happy right now. See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you, and once in a while people may even take your breath away!
That's all for now.
Love all of you,
Lc~