Yeah Yeah Yeah
Everything seems to be falling into place, but like dominos; it will all end and nothing will be left. There will be nothing to move, nothing to do, nothing to watch "destroy" itself. I am helpless. I am lost. And here I am: watching my life fall, one by one, and its just getting faster by the second.
I've realized that life is like a boardgame of checkers. You always have to he ahead of the game; you have to know a move to try to win BEFORE it is your turn. This may be cliche, but this is all I can think about today. Watching myself. Watching my every move. Watching that I don't slip and find myself in a rut, full of imperious thoughts or feelings.
I have to tell the truth: I basically hoed out this girl I've been talking to since May. I won't say her name because I feel ashame. We were suppose to hang out yesterday and do stuff, but I never called her; she never called me. I feel like I should of have, but instead (after school) I started to read this book and it's called: JANE EYRE. The reason why I hoed her out was so I can read the rest of the book for my 3rd block class, but I ended up sleeping until 6pm by a phone call. I looked at my cell and it said: Melina.
So I called back in utter confusion because Melina never calls me. I call and Matt answers. They invite me to go with them to go see "Hostile" so I go and forget the book.
Now I have to question why I did such a thing. Why I hoed out someone but went with someone else. Maybe it's because I'm bored with her or maybe because I asked her out once and she said no and ever since I've been completly akward talking and/or hanging out with her. This may seem like a stretch and if she found out I think she would probably get mad at me, but I think I have to move on. Actually now I know I have to move on. Things like her only make my life even more confusing. And its enough confusing as it is. YOU DONT EVEN KNOW.
I've realized that life is like a boardgame of checkers. You always have to he ahead of the game; you have to know a move to try to win BEFORE it is your turn. This may be cliche, but this is all I can think about today. Watching myself. Watching my every move. Watching that I don't slip and find myself in a rut, full of imperious thoughts or feelings.
I have to tell the truth: I basically hoed out this girl I've been talking to since May. I won't say her name because I feel ashame. We were suppose to hang out yesterday and do stuff, but I never called her; she never called me. I feel like I should of have, but instead (after school) I started to read this book and it's called: JANE EYRE. The reason why I hoed her out was so I can read the rest of the book for my 3rd block class, but I ended up sleeping until 6pm by a phone call. I looked at my cell and it said: Melina.
So I called back in utter confusion because Melina never calls me. I call and Matt answers. They invite me to go with them to go see "Hostile" so I go and forget the book.
Now I have to question why I did such a thing. Why I hoed out someone but went with someone else. Maybe it's because I'm bored with her or maybe because I asked her out once and she said no and ever since I've been completly akward talking and/or hanging out with her. This may seem like a stretch and if she found out I think she would probably get mad at me, but I think I have to move on. Actually now I know I have to move on. Things like her only make my life even more confusing. And its enough confusing as it is. YOU DONT EVEN KNOW.