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Movies - January through March 2008
Just to get it to stop looming over me like some giant self imposed homework assignment I keep forgetting to do, here are all the movies I've seen so far this year and the briefest reviews I can come up with that still explain my feelings about them as films. Sure sure. I'm half-assing. Give me the C- I deserve and let's move on to April.
January 2008
Movies I've Already Seen and Watched Again:
- Knocked Up
- Virgin Suicides
- Transformers
Movies I Fucking Hated:
- Brazil - Love Conquers All Version - Don't get me started. Holy shit. It's like they didn't even have one fucking clue why the actual movie was so amazing. Plus they took a ton of the best scenes from the original completely out and then ransacked the ending and turned it into some crappy movie of the week bullshit. Love conquers all in the original version you morons. Whoever's responsible for this version of the film should have their movie privileges revoked for eternity.
Movies I Didn't Really Feel Strongly About One Way Or the Other:
- Tully - amazing cast. mediocre movie.
- Rescue Dawn - amazing cast. mediocre movie.
- Homicide: The Movie - amazing tv show. mediocre movie
Movie That Killed Me It Was So Great
- No Country for Old Men - I have a lot of things to say about this movie. Anybody who's seen it who wants to discuss it with me, let me know. It's not really worth talking around to avoid giving anything away and it's too long and involved for me to really get down and dirty with spoilers and indepth analysis. So I'll just say that I thought it was an amazing piece of film making and if you want to talk about it more, send me an email.
FEBRUARY/MARCH 2008
Broken Flowers - Jim Jarmucsh has made better films. Lots of them actually. And so has Bill Murray and Jeffrey Wright for that matter. Shit. Sharon Stone's made better movies. And she was in Sliver for cock's sake.
The Hitcher - I love the original. I was mostly interested in seeing my sister in the making of documentary on the special features. The movie itself was lame. But I figured it would have had to have been given how UN-lame the original is. I did like the lead actor guy. Not his dumb haircut. But his performance had a little something there I wasn't expecting.
Skeleton Man - The Sci-Fi Channel plays the world's worst movies on Sunday mornings and so we've taken to drinking our coffee all bleary eyed in front of whatever they're showing. This is a movie about a murderous Indian ghost who picks off a team of "scientists" and "special ops" people in the woods who are exceedingly incompetent and hilariously stupid about how best to dispatch with an undead ancient whatever he was on a horse. Michael Rooker's the only known actor in the whole shebang and it's clearly shot in some very public national forest in Canada somewhere. Truly horrible. And awesomely so.
Spiderman 3 - I'd heard this was terrible so I wasn't expecting much but MAN. This was fucking TERRIBLE. Spiderman as a douchebag emo kid? Somebody cut off my head. Please.
King Cobra - So Skeleton Man was bad, but King Cobra, starring Pat Morita and Erik Estrada? THIS is some priceless cheeze right here. It's about a giant Cobra/Man/Rattlesnake that terrorizes a little town preparing for a brewing festival. So not only did it have hilarious snake "effects" AND Pat Morita, it also had an actual factual brewing montage! And Estrada's a terribly effeminate gay dude. Right? It doesn't get any better than this on a Sunday morning. Amazing. Amazing. Amazing.
Word Play - Documentary about competitive crossword puzzlers. Word nerds of the world, unite!
King of Kong - Documentary about competitive Donkey Kong players. Perhaps one of the best documentaries about anything ever made. Crazy great.
Trekkies - I think I've seen this movie at least a dozen times now. It was a good chaser to King of Kong in a lot of ways. Mostly just fun. As always.
Academy Award Animated Shorts - I love that I live in Austin where The Alamo will show all the Oscar nominated shorts and other stuff no regular person gets to see. We went with our friend who is a real live artist so it was a lot of fun. Very different films all going head to head seems kind of weird to me. I mean, they're all animated. But that's really the only thing they have in common. For my money, The Amazing Screw-On Head is 100 times better than all of these combined but who am I right?
The Wire: Season One - We're going to try to watch the entire series assuming that by the time we're done, the last season will be available on DVD. I haven't seen any new episodes since the end of Season Two so nobody give anything away! It's definitely best to watch this show on DVD to help keep all the characters and their story arcs straight. Back to back you don't have time to forget anything. As someone who loved Homicide and OZ, The Wire is like a horn of plenty. So much great story to wade around in. The acting is ridiculously great and the way the treat the audience like they're smart and on the ball is really refreshing and much appreciated. We just started Season 2 and I'm already remembering a lot of crazy great shit that's going to happen as me move down the line. Yay The Wire!!!
Okay. So that's it. Now I can start over with a clean slate for April. And now that I have a computer in my house again, I won't let months go by without reporting to the world at large about my little OCD tendency to watch and love to watch oodles of noodles of movies.