februaroooooooooowr
OMG HIATUS OVER.
Brendon’s favourite holiday was Valentine’s Day. Hayley had always made fun of him for it, because in her opinion, a holiday wasn’t a holiday unless school was cancelled. He was going to get her back this year, though. It was her first Valentine’s Day since Josh had asked her out, and Brendon had convinced him to order her a giant bouquet of flowers, and a card. And one of the guys in the male quartet owed him a favour, so she’d also be getting serenaded, in the middle of the cafeteria. So while he was in for two weeks of teasing, every time she said something, he smiled sweetly and imagined her face on the 14th.
The problem was, the fourteenth was fast approaching, and Brendon had no idea what he was going to do for Ryan. Somehow he doubted that Ryan would be impressed with flowers or candy, and they didn’t really listen to a lot of the same music. He’d thought about dinner, but he wanted something more. Suddenly, it came to him. A party! Ryan would like that, a whole party for him. He grinned triumphantly, and went to find Hayley.
“Hey!” he called when he saw her. “Hayley!”
She turned around, “What?” she looked at him expectantly.
“Okay, for Valentine’s Day-”
“You’re going to get a sex change, so you can really let your inner female shine?” she asked, grinning.
Brendon glared at her, “Ha ha ha. No, you bitch, I’m going to have a party!”
Hayley looked at him incredulously. “My God, that actually sounds like a good idea!”
Brendon stuck out his tongue. “I do have those, occasionally.”
“I know, surprises me every time!” Hayley grabbed his hand as they strolled down the hall. “So I’m assuming you need my house?”
Brendon nodded. “God knows Papa Urie wouldn’t want a whole bunch of alternative freaks running around his perfect halls.” Brendon rolled his eyes, and Hayley gave his hand an extra squeeze.
“Well, my doors are always open, for partying and anything else.” Hayley said kindly.
“I know.” The bell rang, and they separated then, each going to their individual classes. Brendon was excited, party plans already bubbling over in his mind.
**
“Hey.” Ryan said quietly, coming up behind Brendon and wrapping his arms around him.
“Hi.” Brendon said, closing their locker, then turning around to kiss him. “So what are you doing on, uh, the fourteenth?”
“Um…” Ryan said thoughtfully, “Maybe eating a bunch of chocolate? Appreciating the beauty of a red rose? Having a nice scented bath with candles and rose petals?” he waggled his eyebrows suggestively.
Brendon shoved him away, laughing. “You know, that all sounds absolutely wonderful, but um, what would you do if I were to invite you to the party of the year?”
“At your house?” Ryan said, a little too quickly.
Brendon shook his head, “My parents are home, you know, old people shit.”
Ryan nodded, and Brendon appreciated the fact that he didn’t ask any more. He smiled, tilting his had coyly. “A party sounds just perfect.” he said.
**
It was February fourteenth,Valentine’s Day, the day of the party, and Brendon was officially drunk. In his opinion, the night had been going fantastically. Around two thirds of ECIFA and a crowd from the neighboring school were all milling around Hayley’s main floor and basement, dancing, talking, and indulging in various illicit activities. Currently, Brendon was sitting with a large group of people, and playing a game of truth or dare. It was finally his turn, and everyone turned to him as a girl named Vicky asked him the fateful question.
“Truth or dare?”
Brendon grinned, and picked what he always picked. “Dare.”
Vicky nodded, and looked around, thinking of a good dare. A devilish grin spread on her face. “Okay…” she said slowly. “Brendon. Kiss Gabe.”
Brendon looked across the circle, where a boy named Gabe sat. He was pretty sure that they were in the same math class, and he vaguely remembered Gabe asking him out to a movie once. He’d said no for some reason, he couldn’t quite remember why, though… Brendon smiled and crawled across the circle. “Gladly.” he said, climbing right on top of him. Brendon leaned in, and pressed a quick kiss against Gabe’s lips, tasting alcohol and cigarettes. He went to pull back, but then he felt Gabe reach around and cup the back of his head, pulling him closer. Brendon felt weird, but didn’t pull back, even as he heard the catcalls and whistles. Suddenly, the room went silent, and Brendon finally tore himself away. He turned around, and locked eyes with Ryan, who was standing, holding a cup of beer in each hand. Brendon felt his throat close, and his mouth dry up completely. Ryan. He pushed himself off of Gabe’s lap, and stood up, stumbling and falling on his way to get to Ryan.
“What…” Ryan said quietly, looking down at Brendon, “What’s going on.”
Brendon opened his mouth to speak, and was horrified to find that no words came out. He wanted to jump up and apologize and explain that it was just a game, that he was drunk, anything, but his brain wasn’t connecting to his body, to his mouth. He just sat there on the floor while his brain screamed for him to move, just staring and gaping until Ryan flung his cup at him and stalked out. He felt arms wrap around his shoulders, and he pushed violently away, standing to go find Ryan.
“Hey!” he heard a voice slur. It was Gabe, calling out from behind him. “Dude, he’s being fucking stupid, you don’t need him! Let’s finish our game!” he leered.
Brendon turned around, “Fuck you.” he said viciously. “Don’t say a fucking word about him.” He pushed past the crowd that had gathered, ignoring the gasps and jeers.
When he got upstairs, Brendon looked around frantically for Ryan, searching every room and scanning every face. In the foyer, he spotted Greta, and quickly grabbed her. “Greta, have you seen Ryan?” he asked, trying not to let his voice reach breaking point.
“Uh, yeah, actually.” she said guardedly, “He left about a minute ago, he was really upset. Brendon, what did you-”
Brendon hugged her, and started to look for his shoes. “Thank you so much!” he said.
“Brendon! What happened?” she asked urgently.
“I have to go!” he said, flying out the door. Once the cold air hit Brendon’s face, he realized that he probably should have grabbed a coat, but he couldn’t go back to the party. He scanned the street, looking for Ryan’s familiar form. He spotted someone moving in the shadows, and ran towards them, ignoring the wind as it whipped his hair back from his face.
“Ryan!” he yelled, before the figure turned the corner. It hesitated for a second, and he saw Ryan look back, before turning again to face the night. “Ryan, wait!” Ryan didn’t stop, and so Brendon kept running, thankful for the laps he’d been running for gym. Finally, he caught up, and put a hand on Ryan’s shoulder. “Ryan…” he panted, “Stop, please.”
Ryan finally stopped walking, standing with his back to Brendon.
“Oh. So you can talk now.” he said coldly, not turning around.
“Ryan, I am so so sorry.” he said quietly. “We were playing truth or dare, and I’m fucking smashed and…”
“And you just couldn’t help but cheat on your boyfriend?” Ryan said, turning around.
“Yes, I, wait no! It’s not like that it’s just-”
“When someone dares you to stick your tongue down another guy’s throat, you just do it! Okay! I get it!”
“Ryan, no, I’m sorry! I love you, I just-”
Ryan bristled. “Shut up, Brendon. You don’t even know what that fucking means.” he spat, before turning away and walking quickly down the street.
Brendon stood, shaking as he watched Ryan get further and further away. Finally, he lost sight of him, and there was only the dark, and the wind whistling through the trees. Brendon took in a deep breath, and choked, his throat seemed to constrict completely. He coughed, once, twice and then let out a small sob. He was surprised to find tears streaming down his face, and he wiped his eyes slowly before retreating back into the place he least wanted to be.
Brendon’s favourite holiday was Valentine’s Day. Hayley had always made fun of him for it, because in her opinion, a holiday wasn’t a holiday unless school was cancelled. He was going to get her back this year, though. It was her first Valentine’s Day since Josh had asked her out, and Brendon had convinced him to order her a giant bouquet of flowers, and a card. And one of the guys in the male quartet owed him a favour, so she’d also be getting serenaded, in the middle of the cafeteria. So while he was in for two weeks of teasing, every time she said something, he smiled sweetly and imagined her face on the 14th.
The problem was, the fourteenth was fast approaching, and Brendon had no idea what he was going to do for Ryan. Somehow he doubted that Ryan would be impressed with flowers or candy, and they didn’t really listen to a lot of the same music. He’d thought about dinner, but he wanted something more. Suddenly, it came to him. A party! Ryan would like that, a whole party for him. He grinned triumphantly, and went to find Hayley.
“Hey!” he called when he saw her. “Hayley!”
She turned around, “What?” she looked at him expectantly.
“Okay, for Valentine’s Day-”
“You’re going to get a sex change, so you can really let your inner female shine?” she asked, grinning.
Brendon glared at her, “Ha ha ha. No, you bitch, I’m going to have a party!”
Hayley looked at him incredulously. “My God, that actually sounds like a good idea!”
Brendon stuck out his tongue. “I do have those, occasionally.”
“I know, surprises me every time!” Hayley grabbed his hand as they strolled down the hall. “So I’m assuming you need my house?”
Brendon nodded. “God knows Papa Urie wouldn’t want a whole bunch of alternative freaks running around his perfect halls.” Brendon rolled his eyes, and Hayley gave his hand an extra squeeze.
“Well, my doors are always open, for partying and anything else.” Hayley said kindly.
“I know.” The bell rang, and they separated then, each going to their individual classes. Brendon was excited, party plans already bubbling over in his mind.
**
“Hey.” Ryan said quietly, coming up behind Brendon and wrapping his arms around him.
“Hi.” Brendon said, closing their locker, then turning around to kiss him. “So what are you doing on, uh, the fourteenth?”
“Um…” Ryan said thoughtfully, “Maybe eating a bunch of chocolate? Appreciating the beauty of a red rose? Having a nice scented bath with candles and rose petals?” he waggled his eyebrows suggestively.
Brendon shoved him away, laughing. “You know, that all sounds absolutely wonderful, but um, what would you do if I were to invite you to the party of the year?”
“At your house?” Ryan said, a little too quickly.
Brendon shook his head, “My parents are home, you know, old people shit.”
Ryan nodded, and Brendon appreciated the fact that he didn’t ask any more. He smiled, tilting his had coyly. “A party sounds just perfect.” he said.
**
It was February fourteenth,Valentine’s Day, the day of the party, and Brendon was officially drunk. In his opinion, the night had been going fantastically. Around two thirds of ECIFA and a crowd from the neighboring school were all milling around Hayley’s main floor and basement, dancing, talking, and indulging in various illicit activities. Currently, Brendon was sitting with a large group of people, and playing a game of truth or dare. It was finally his turn, and everyone turned to him as a girl named Vicky asked him the fateful question.
“Truth or dare?”
Brendon grinned, and picked what he always picked. “Dare.”
Vicky nodded, and looked around, thinking of a good dare. A devilish grin spread on her face. “Okay…” she said slowly. “Brendon. Kiss Gabe.”
Brendon looked across the circle, where a boy named Gabe sat. He was pretty sure that they were in the same math class, and he vaguely remembered Gabe asking him out to a movie once. He’d said no for some reason, he couldn’t quite remember why, though… Brendon smiled and crawled across the circle. “Gladly.” he said, climbing right on top of him. Brendon leaned in, and pressed a quick kiss against Gabe’s lips, tasting alcohol and cigarettes. He went to pull back, but then he felt Gabe reach around and cup the back of his head, pulling him closer. Brendon felt weird, but didn’t pull back, even as he heard the catcalls and whistles. Suddenly, the room went silent, and Brendon finally tore himself away. He turned around, and locked eyes with Ryan, who was standing, holding a cup of beer in each hand. Brendon felt his throat close, and his mouth dry up completely. Ryan. He pushed himself off of Gabe’s lap, and stood up, stumbling and falling on his way to get to Ryan.
“What…” Ryan said quietly, looking down at Brendon, “What’s going on.”
Brendon opened his mouth to speak, and was horrified to find that no words came out. He wanted to jump up and apologize and explain that it was just a game, that he was drunk, anything, but his brain wasn’t connecting to his body, to his mouth. He just sat there on the floor while his brain screamed for him to move, just staring and gaping until Ryan flung his cup at him and stalked out. He felt arms wrap around his shoulders, and he pushed violently away, standing to go find Ryan.
“Hey!” he heard a voice slur. It was Gabe, calling out from behind him. “Dude, he’s being fucking stupid, you don’t need him! Let’s finish our game!” he leered.
Brendon turned around, “Fuck you.” he said viciously. “Don’t say a fucking word about him.” He pushed past the crowd that had gathered, ignoring the gasps and jeers.
When he got upstairs, Brendon looked around frantically for Ryan, searching every room and scanning every face. In the foyer, he spotted Greta, and quickly grabbed her. “Greta, have you seen Ryan?” he asked, trying not to let his voice reach breaking point.
“Uh, yeah, actually.” she said guardedly, “He left about a minute ago, he was really upset. Brendon, what did you-”
Brendon hugged her, and started to look for his shoes. “Thank you so much!” he said.
“Brendon! What happened?” she asked urgently.
“I have to go!” he said, flying out the door. Once the cold air hit Brendon’s face, he realized that he probably should have grabbed a coat, but he couldn’t go back to the party. He scanned the street, looking for Ryan’s familiar form. He spotted someone moving in the shadows, and ran towards them, ignoring the wind as it whipped his hair back from his face.
“Ryan!” he yelled, before the figure turned the corner. It hesitated for a second, and he saw Ryan look back, before turning again to face the night. “Ryan, wait!” Ryan didn’t stop, and so Brendon kept running, thankful for the laps he’d been running for gym. Finally, he caught up, and put a hand on Ryan’s shoulder. “Ryan…” he panted, “Stop, please.”
Ryan finally stopped walking, standing with his back to Brendon.
“Oh. So you can talk now.” he said coldly, not turning around.
“Ryan, I am so so sorry.” he said quietly. “We were playing truth or dare, and I’m fucking smashed and…”
“And you just couldn’t help but cheat on your boyfriend?” Ryan said, turning around.
“Yes, I, wait no! It’s not like that it’s just-”
“When someone dares you to stick your tongue down another guy’s throat, you just do it! Okay! I get it!”
“Ryan, no, I’m sorry! I love you, I just-”
Ryan bristled. “Shut up, Brendon. You don’t even know what that fucking means.” he spat, before turning away and walking quickly down the street.
Brendon stood, shaking as he watched Ryan get further and further away. Finally, he lost sight of him, and there was only the dark, and the wind whistling through the trees. Brendon took in a deep breath, and choked, his throat seemed to constrict completely. He coughed, once, twice and then let out a small sob. He was surprised to find tears streaming down his face, and he wiped his eyes slowly before retreating back into the place he least wanted to be.