oh, angst
Sigh. I feel like such a bad person, for wanting to be around him, when I know darn well that he has a girlfriend. But, at the same time, nothing ever happens when I'm alone with him. Well..stuff does happen, but not that kind of stuff. She knows that he likes me. And she knows that I like him. It must have been awkward, when I was talking to her about him two days ago. But..It's hard to talk to anyone else about it, because no one else knows him the way that she does. She knows exactly what I'm talking about, because she's noticed what I've noticed, and feels what I feel. I remember apologizing to her, saying that I should have never placed her in such an uncomfortable position, talking about my feelings for who she is dating. She said that she was glad I was able to get everything out of my system, and that it makes her happy that I feel like I can talk to her. And that I can call her anytime during the day, or during the night, if I feel the need to get anything else off of my chest. And then she hugged me. Sigh. They both decided that they would break-up before the summer was over, but they haven't yet. And, until they do, I guess I'm going to continue feeling like a terrible person, and an awful friend.
Because I should have backed away once I found out that he had a girlfriend.