Selfish Behavior
Title: Selfish Behavior
Chapter: One
Author:
citricpepper
Pairing: Frank/OFC, Mikey/OFC Frank/Gerard and a bit of Bert/Gerard
Rating: NC-17 overall
Beta: the lovely
gee4president
Genre: Drama/Romance
POV: First, switches in every chapter
Summary: When you think only about yourself, the person you'll be hurting the most is you.
Disclaimer: Not real, never happened, don't sue
Warnings: Lots of swearing, homophobia, graphic homo and straight sex, strong references to cutting/drugs/boozing, mild violence, attempt of suicide, possible character death. You've been warned. Don't read if you'll feel offended by it.
Author's notes: My first ever story in English. My first ever slash fic. Please, bare with me.
Dedications: The old mcrfan forum crew and my little goldfish
Chapter one
~Frank's POV
“Where the fuck is Gerard for god's sake?” Mikey asked in a bored tone. “I'm tired and I wanna go home.”
“I saw him going outside; he didn't even answer when I called him.” Ray replied.
“Oh fuck.” I felt like an avalanche was crashing through the pit of my stomach.
“What’s wrong Frank?” They both asked, looking at me with furrowed brows.
“You know what happens when he does this,” was my answer. I knew and I looked down. I didn't even wanna verbalize what was in my mind.
“Oh shit,” Mikey groaned. I made my move to leave the room, but I felt someone grabbing my arm, making me grimace.
“Baby, where are you going?” Liah asked, alarmed. “You promised we'd hang out together tonight!”
“I know sweetheart but Gerard really needs me right now,” I muttered doing my best to keep my voice low. Liah's insecurity had always pissed me off.
“Well I need you too!” She whined. I looked deep into her green eyes, adorned by expensive mascara and eyeliner.
“Baby, c'mon, don't be upset. I promise I'll make it up for you another time.”
“Well bad news Mr. Iero.” She snapped. “If you go, there won’t be 'another time'.” She crossed her arms, stubbornly across her chest. ‘Shit’
“Liah, please don't do this okay? You know how fucked up Gerard is, he's my best friend; I need to help him now. Please try to be a bit understanding, just try,” I begged. I was so close to telling her to go and fuck herself and running to check on Gerard. I was becoming impatient. Very, very impatient.
She batted her eyelashes pleadingly for a few moments before sighing deeply.
“Fine, whatever,” She growled, grabbing her stuff and dashing from room.
“Awesome…Just fucking awesome,” I said bitterly, before turning around to go and look for Gerard.
I knew what he was doing, and that was what worried me the most. He went to ‘powder’ his nose, obviously. Just like every night. Abusing himself like there was no tomorrow, sinking into depression. I couldn't understand how he could be as deeply down as he was, seeing no light in anything, even with the band succeeding more and more each day. The only thing he cared about was getting as high as possible and waking up the next day in some ditch on the other side of the city.
We found him outside the club. He was passed out on the floor. His limp body was thrown on the landing, his dirty hair plastered on his white, perfect face, his small nose dripping the melted mixture of cocaine, joined by the red trace of dry blood staining his soft skin.
So helpless, so vulnerable, so gorgeous.
We carried him with to my old SUV.
“It's okay guys, Liah probably won't talk to again me today anyway. I'll take care of him, you can go home. Your mom will freak out if you take him home like this Mikey, you know that.”
He sighed in reply.
“Are you sure Frank?” Bob asked.
“Yeah, totally. I'll bring him over tomorrow.”
I drove back to my apartment, keeping one eye on the road and another on his unconscious form.
“Gee, wake up man,” I whispered softly in his ear when we reached my garage. He opened his gorgeous gray eyes to look me. They seemed so empty. “We need to go upstairs.”
He blindly put his arm around my neck, so I could support him and we stumbled into my apartment. He collapsed on my bed. Fuck, he was so drugged. I could easily take advantage of him. But I'd never stoop so low… Would I?
So yeah. I liked him, and not only as a good friend. I loved every single detail about him. That's why I was always kissing him when we were drunk.
He was perfect.
But, well, I had two problems. One, he was not gay. He never said that he wasn't, but he never did anything that would make me think otherwise. And I'd never have the balls to "come out of the closet". I had a beautiful girlfriend (even though I thought about Gerard when we were having sex) and couldn't bare the prospect of people knowing that I liked guys… So that was why it hurt me so bad to see him like this, so sad, so depressed. I wished I could do something, but he wouldn't talk to me about this. I wished I could help him, but he wouldn't let me and that was truly killing me.
I put on my pajamas, took his shoes and his jacket off. I resisted the temptation to take off the rest of his clothes… I was dying to see his boxers, but I would be such a sick pervert if I did that. So, I crawled into bed with him. I wrapped my arms around his waist from behind, his mint scent filling my nose. He was so warm, the skin of his arms was so soft. I wished I could do so many things with him… So many not PG things…
“Fuck Gee, you drive me insane…” I whispered to myself breathing deeply in order to keep my southern region under control.
comments? ._.
Chapter: One
Author:
citricpepper
Pairing: Frank/OFC, Mikey/OFC Frank/Gerard and a bit of Bert/Gerard
Rating: NC-17 overall
Beta: the lovely
gee4president
Genre: Drama/Romance
POV: First, switches in every chapter
Summary: When you think only about yourself, the person you'll be hurting the most is you.
Disclaimer: Not real, never happened, don't sue
Warnings: Lots of swearing, homophobia, graphic homo and straight sex, strong references to cutting/drugs/boozing, mild violence, attempt of suicide, possible character death. You've been warned. Don't read if you'll feel offended by it.
Author's notes: My first ever story in English. My first ever slash fic. Please, bare with me.
Dedications: The old mcrfan forum crew and my little goldfish
Chapter one
~Frank's POV
“Where the fuck is Gerard for god's sake?” Mikey asked in a bored tone. “I'm tired and I wanna go home.”
“I saw him going outside; he didn't even answer when I called him.” Ray replied.
“Oh fuck.” I felt like an avalanche was crashing through the pit of my stomach.
“What’s wrong Frank?” They both asked, looking at me with furrowed brows.
“You know what happens when he does this,” was my answer. I knew and I looked down. I didn't even wanna verbalize what was in my mind.
“Oh shit,” Mikey groaned. I made my move to leave the room, but I felt someone grabbing my arm, making me grimace.
“Baby, where are you going?” Liah asked, alarmed. “You promised we'd hang out together tonight!”
“I know sweetheart but Gerard really needs me right now,” I muttered doing my best to keep my voice low. Liah's insecurity had always pissed me off.
“Well I need you too!” She whined. I looked deep into her green eyes, adorned by expensive mascara and eyeliner.
“Baby, c'mon, don't be upset. I promise I'll make it up for you another time.”
“Well bad news Mr. Iero.” She snapped. “If you go, there won’t be 'another time'.” She crossed her arms, stubbornly across her chest. ‘Shit’
“Liah, please don't do this okay? You know how fucked up Gerard is, he's my best friend; I need to help him now. Please try to be a bit understanding, just try,” I begged. I was so close to telling her to go and fuck herself and running to check on Gerard. I was becoming impatient. Very, very impatient.
She batted her eyelashes pleadingly for a few moments before sighing deeply.
“Fine, whatever,” She growled, grabbing her stuff and dashing from room.
“Awesome…Just fucking awesome,” I said bitterly, before turning around to go and look for Gerard.
I knew what he was doing, and that was what worried me the most. He went to ‘powder’ his nose, obviously. Just like every night. Abusing himself like there was no tomorrow, sinking into depression. I couldn't understand how he could be as deeply down as he was, seeing no light in anything, even with the band succeeding more and more each day. The only thing he cared about was getting as high as possible and waking up the next day in some ditch on the other side of the city.
We found him outside the club. He was passed out on the floor. His limp body was thrown on the landing, his dirty hair plastered on his white, perfect face, his small nose dripping the melted mixture of cocaine, joined by the red trace of dry blood staining his soft skin.
So helpless, so vulnerable, so gorgeous.
We carried him with to my old SUV.
“It's okay guys, Liah probably won't talk to again me today anyway. I'll take care of him, you can go home. Your mom will freak out if you take him home like this Mikey, you know that.”
He sighed in reply.
“Are you sure Frank?” Bob asked.
“Yeah, totally. I'll bring him over tomorrow.”
I drove back to my apartment, keeping one eye on the road and another on his unconscious form.
“Gee, wake up man,” I whispered softly in his ear when we reached my garage. He opened his gorgeous gray eyes to look me. They seemed so empty. “We need to go upstairs.”
He blindly put his arm around my neck, so I could support him and we stumbled into my apartment. He collapsed on my bed. Fuck, he was so drugged. I could easily take advantage of him. But I'd never stoop so low… Would I?
So yeah. I liked him, and not only as a good friend. I loved every single detail about him. That's why I was always kissing him when we were drunk.
He was perfect.
But, well, I had two problems. One, he was not gay. He never said that he wasn't, but he never did anything that would make me think otherwise. And I'd never have the balls to "come out of the closet". I had a beautiful girlfriend (even though I thought about Gerard when we were having sex) and couldn't bare the prospect of people knowing that I liked guys… So that was why it hurt me so bad to see him like this, so sad, so depressed. I wished I could do something, but he wouldn't talk to me about this. I wished I could help him, but he wouldn't let me and that was truly killing me.
I put on my pajamas, took his shoes and his jacket off. I resisted the temptation to take off the rest of his clothes… I was dying to see his boxers, but I would be such a sick pervert if I did that. So, I crawled into bed with him. I wrapped my arms around his waist from behind, his mint scent filling my nose. He was so warm, the skin of his arms was so soft. I wished I could do so many things with him… So many not PG things…
“Fuck Gee, you drive me insane…” I whispered to myself breathing deeply in order to keep my southern region under control.
comments? ._.