Results Day
I haven’t updated in totally ages and that’s because I have been working all the hours god sends. However I thought an event like results day couldn’t go without an entry.
It began with me staying on the internet until 2:30 in the morning because I couldn’t sleep and I thought that when I finally went to bed I would sleep right through. Before I went to sleep I wrote in my diary “I am so scared about tomorrow I can’t even try to think about it because I get scared. I don’t know if I should look on UCAS before or not. I can’t bear to think about it.”
I was woken at 7:15 by Lizi texting me which was annoying at the time because I was asleep and could have slept for longer instead I spent the next 2hours in bed worrying about results while texting Lizi with extracts from Catherine Tate. At 9:20 I got out of bed and after a small breakdown where I cried I showered and ate. Jane our cleaner was telling me how she thought I would be fine and my dad and her were both saying that it doesn’t matter. I left the house to get into the car and saw a letter addressed to me but thought it was just a bank statement so left without looking at it. On the way to Sharnbrook I spoke to Lizi on the phone and asked her and Anne to wait for me to arrive. I almost cried again in the car I was so nervous when we arrived I asked dad to park somewhere hidden and that I would come out and see him. I went in and basically Anne got hers and walked off while I went with Lizi to a corner when she cried and told me she had got AAB. I was so happy for her but instantly began panicking about my results. Inman came along and asked how we had done. Lizi said hers and he said I know (meaning her geography grade) I told him I was far too scared to actually open them he then told me to go somewhere private and on my own to open them. I took this to mean I had got a C in geography not the B I wanted so walked out heart broken. In true style my dad had parked outside the main entrance to the school in full view of everyone so I was opening them in full view of people. He began reading them to me saying BB. Once I knew I had 2B’s all I needed was an A so began repeatedly saying did I get an A. He read out another B and I still shouted did I get an A? He finally said I did so I hugged him and the checked them myself and went to see Lizi and other people. Inside I spoke to lots of people, Mrs Rose said well done to me and Inman was also really nice and McQueen was too.
After mingling for a while I went home to show Marie and my sister my results. I then went to tell a very pregnant Emily what I got. I ran into Val from the shop who asked me if I was nervous about next week. I was like it was today and told her what I got. She hugged me and said how proud she was and was really nice. I saw Emily and we went for a long walk to bring on labour.
After a chilled out afternoon I began planning that night out. With the theme being school disco I got my disco outfit ready of school boy. I went to Lizi’s where we had ABBA on and drank Champaign. I began calling people who all seemed to not be dressing up at all while I stood with Emma Bunton and myself with a satchel. We drew on school kid spots and then went to the park for drinks.
We met with Lipinski and eventually Hannah G. we were drunk and a bit rowdy and me smacking Helen on the bum didn’t go down well. After making tits of ourselves we got into a taxi where I began showing Lizi what I learned on the ministry of mayhem “Whateva your mother works in McDonalds” complete with hand actions. As the taxi arrived in Bedford we saw Inman and Miss Morgan so got out and walked with them to soviet where we met lots of people and everyone seemed to have got in. After some laughs in Soviet we went to square and then onto Oxygen because we were on the VIP list.
We arrived and one bouncer said we wouldn’t be allowed in but then another said we would so we began up the stairs where I saw a woman smacking people’s bums with a ruler which me and Lizi found very amusing. I can’t remember too clearly what happened over the rest of the evening but it was the best night ever. Everyone seemed to be out and I have lots of mobile phone pictures of it. Danced with Heaney for a large part and kept repeatedly smacking Pudd’s bum. Went to the chill out room and saw Kevin from Liberty X who looks bad in the flesh and chain smokes like a chimney. I spoke to Laura Hoyle and Becky Childs. I was telling Becky not to pull the guy next to her because he was minging and then was told 10minutes later by Laura how much Becky loves him. I gave Becky a transfer on the boob and inner thigh which meant her pants were soaked with wine. I also did my best to keep Tom and Lizi apart but that was eventually shot to shit. I also remember lifting up lots of people’s skirts and having a go at everyone who wasn’t dressed as school kids then throwing up black sick. At the end of the evening I went to subway and just as I was going to have mine they ran out of bread so me and Lizi ran to the other side of Bedford to go to the other subway which as I put my hands on the door to open it got shut and locked. We both settled for millennium kebabs.
After a taxi ride home I realised that he had gone past the turning for the high street and was in fact on the bridge. Still being drunk I thought that the walk would be good. In fact I got home at 3:40ish. I set my alarm for 8am so I could get to the shop and stick with the lie I had told them by arriving around 9. I woke up at 5ish burning up and took the covers off my bed and splashed myself with water. I was then woken by my dad at 10:10 and literally went to the toilet, swilled some water and toothpaste in my mouth put on some trousers and the shirt and 3minutes later I was in the shop but out of my face.
I walked in with alcohol seeping out of my pours getting looks like I was ill and lots of sympathy. Val even bought me some water as a present and said it helps her daughter when they are hung over. After an hour of being still drunk the hangover kicked in. To make my hangover worse I spent the morning lifting boxes in the unair-conditioned shop and putting out wine and beer. I wanted to die. The good points were that people kept saying well done and Lucie called me a genius.
Once my shift was over I went home ate and then went to the doctors for my appointment. Still yet to shower and my skin still sticky from sweating millennium chicken, tequila, vodka and God knows what in the shop I sat down in the waiting room before I was called. I walked through to the room before asking about the lump behind my ear which is just a swollen gland. The only thing is they usually go down after a few weeks not 9 years in my case. I then asked about the ‘birthmark’ under my nipple. I lifted up my top and then realised on my tummy was a transfer from the night before so I looked like an immature 8 year old. I said is it normal and after a few pokes he said it was an accessory nipple and then asked if it was symmetrical. I was like no so therefore there are no big problems. I was going to ask about my weight but after an accessory nipple, transfer and a 9 year old swollen gland I decided I had humiliated myself enough and went home.