DVD commentary track

[circ_bamboo]

Pick a passage from my stories, up to 500 words, from anything I've written in this journal, and comment to this post with that selection (including a link to the story being excerpted). I will then give you a DVD commentary on that snippet: what I was thinking when I wrote it, why I wrote it in the first place, what's going on in the character's

Comments

[circ_bamboo]

Oh, man. This is one of those stories that went through so many revisions. At first, they were going to wake up in bed together and have no idea how they got there. Then, she knew but he didn't. And then, she knew and he didn't know and it happened more than once. (And I think I had a short email discussion with you about how Phil would possibly had let him out of Sickbay with a concussion.)

One of my rare excursions into present tense (I don't know why I started it that way but I think it works, in that it kind of emphasizes that he can't remember what came before /self-important analysis), this is also a more-clueless-than-usual Pike, in one of the pocket-universes where they sizzle with sexual tension for more years than usual (I tend to want to pitch them into bed ASAP) and Pike, um, pretty much just pines.

I would kind of like to have written this story from One's point of view (or if someone wants to remix it?); I think she is achy, too, and really wants nothing more than to wrap herself around him and Make It All Better.

I don't think he ever remembers but I'm sure he gets another chance to wake up next to her. :-D

[boosette]

I AM FILLED WITH FLAILY GLEE. I mean. Not that they're aching and not together, but -- oh, you know. Knowing this makes it better.

and Pike, um, pretty much just pines.

(there is a deeply bad pun there that I'm not making. instead I will use appropriate icon is appropriate)