Apathy
It seems no one really looks at these things anymore. I mean no one. It would be nice to know that there are a couple of people that still look at LJs and shit. I guess not. I mean I'll still write in this thing cause why not. WHy put it to waste, it seems that's what everyone does is put shit to waste. They find something new and completely forget about the "old" shit. It's pathetic but that's life I guess. The world is a selfish and concieted place. At least our society is here in America. Sometimes I just think what's the point of all this hard work and suffering when in the end I still feel miserable and I still feel like I will never deserve anything to make me happy. I feel like I'm gunna have to bust ass and work harder then everybody else and still never achieve happiness cause that's how it has been since I could remember. I fucking hate it. ANd then people wonder why I used to get fucked up all the time. Cause that was the only thing that made me happy. I"m scared I might fall back in the abyss of drugs. I mean I'm trying my hardest to enjoy this sober life and shit but someone needs to prove to me the value of being in this life. CAuse i feel like I will be like this forever. FUCK I'm going for now.