{ORIG} Diary of 001: Entry 002. No More Background Music...
And so, pages later after stalling with my silly background, I’m sure you’re thinking, “FINALLY, the good part, right?” Sort of.
Weeks passed and nothing changed at the psychiatric facility. I was asked a number of times by the other patients what I was in for, like it was some kind of prison where being the most insane was awesome. I quite simply was not crazy-am not, still. So, each time I was asked, I’d respond the same. “I killed a boy.” Then I’d be asked for my age. “Twelve.” That was when the reality struck that innocent, adorable children aren’t always nice. Most of the patients were simply suicidal teenagers. According to the doctors, that was the case anyway.
Rosalina came to wake me one fine morning, chipper as ever. “I’ve got good news!” she chirped, entering the room. “We’re transferring you to another facility because we don’t believe you have anything wrong with you.”
“Good,” I muttered. “Because I am not crazy.”
I think in some moments, I started to somewhat scare the poor nurse. I received very intimidated looks from her. But, I suppose to some extent, that was what I wanted. However, this transfer didn’t sound like it would be a good thing at all. “They’re going to have to run some more advanced tests on you there just to make sure before we can come to a conclusion.”
“I’m not understanding… how it’s good news.”
Rosalina just grinned. “You’ll get out of here, won’t you?”
“Only to get stuck somewhere else.”
After that, I believe she just gave up. “They’re coming to get you in an hour or so. We’ll give you your things before you leave.”
She didn’t give me any time to interject. Instead, she just exited the room and left me sitting on that stiff bed with rumpled sheets and messy hair, wondering what I was being transferred for if they found nothing wrong with me. I was also left wondering if the facility would be a little more welcoming than that place-and if the food would be better. Moments later, the nurse returned telling me that my escort to the new facility had arrived and it was time for me to leave. She wished me luck, which I didn’t understand. I felt maybe she meant it as, “Have fun staying out of prison, kid.”
I was walked downstairs without any restraints which was one of the first oddities I noticed about this trip. Secondly, I was being escorted in a limousine. That definitely threw me off. I stepped in the stretch limo and sat down in the first seat I noticed. I hadn’t quite realized I wasn’t alone yet until the other person within the vehicle spoke to me. “Greetings, Victoria,” a male voice called from within the extended cab.
My eyes turned to find a silver-haired male whose facial features were young and chiseled, but his hair told of age. I couldn’t tell who he was or what he wanted, but it was obvious that whatever facility I was being shipped off to, he was in charge. “Hi,” I said plainly, unsure of what else I was going to say in such an awkward situation.
“You’ll come to know me quite well in due time, but for now, my name is Zion.”
“Funny how your name represents heaven. Are you as pure as your name may suggest?”
Zion’s pearly whites gleamed like malicious fangs more than just a simple smile. “I have no reason to be nothing but that. You’re a very smart young girl, Victoria.”
“That I am,” I replied, crossing my arms. “I can tell when something’s up. And I think there’s something amiss here.”
Zion’s face seemed to tense a little as I stated that. “What seems to be the matter?” he asked softly.
His voice was tender enough, but something in his posture and the way he carried himself seemed vaguely menacing in my eyes. “This situation is off. There is no reason to transport me elsewhere other than juvenile detention if there’s nothing wrong with me. There really is no need for other tests.”
Zion tried to relax himself and I noticed this. “Victoria, you are but a young child. There are just some things that have to be done before you can just be released or sent off. Let the adults handle the business, you worry about what’s going to happen to you afterward,” he told me.
Our conversation felt as though it took an entire hour. However, it was less than fifteen minutes, for we arrived shortly after the conversation ended. Entering the doors of the new facility was like entering another mental facility only as opposed to gray and white, it was strictly white. No, seriously, it was essentially all I saw besides speckles of black and gray. White. I felt as though I were walking into a dream. However, besides the lack of color, it seemed a little bit more pleasant than the Harold facility. Although, I was still focused on the fact I wanted to see more color in these damn places.
The moment we made it to the desk at the front, we were accompanied by two pretty massive guards. One was an African American, built like a freaking brick house though he wore a small, genuinely sweet smile. He sort of resembled a teddy bear, though not as plush. No, it didn’t look like he had a single ounce of fat on him. But he did not seem threatening at all. The second was a shorter, but equally built white guy. He was easily recognizable, being short and stocky. He reminded me of an angry bulldog with his size and the way his eyebrows seemed permanently furrowed. I had a feeling I wouldn’t care about either of them anyway. I sighed as they stood by my arms whilst Zion spent a few moments explaining to put me in a high-security room by myself on the seventh floor. Apparently I was a risk. Zion turned and smirked faintly, a smirk that I remember clearly. It was something menacing, almost predatory. It reminded me most of an alligator. “Enjoy your stay,” he hissed, walking the opposite direction as the two guards led me toward the elevator.
We entered the elevator silently and took it to the seventh floor. As soon as we stepped out, the white guard began complaining about how the black guy was going to take the first guard shift because he was sick of babysitting. And with that, he huffed off down the dim, empty hallway. It was way too silent.
The black guard I was stuck with sighed. “Dirk is very bull-headed,” he commented, “always angry.”
I just smiled faintly. I felt that I could actually get along with this one. “He seems like it,” I replied softly.
It was odd that I was bonding with someone who was going to essentially stalk me for an indefinite amount of time. “Just so you know, my name is Robert. Despite the fact I’m not really supposed to have a friendship with you, it’d just be rude of me not to at least let you know who I am.”
“Who says we can’t be friends?” I asked sincerely. I needed a friend.
“Zion,” he replied softly, “but I’ll make a secret exception. I understand what you’re in here for, but I have faith you will at least spare me, miss assassin.”
He was the first person to say anything about my dreams and not seem like he was mocking me. “I totally would,” I told him. “I seriously want to be one.”
Robert winked at me. “So I heard. You’ve got some big dreams, Victoria.”
“Did they tell you everything about me or something?”
“It’s required since we’re supposedly endangering our lives protecting you. I feel if I just be myself, I won’t be endangering myself. If I act like Dirk, on the other hand, it might be a possibility.” He laughed. His voice and his laugh were equally deep and smooth. Kind. Honest.
I just grinned. “This is true. I’ll avoid beating you up.”
He laughed again. “Good deal.”
He led me to a room in which there was one bed-though it looked much more comfortable-and a chair. There was a window, but I caught the sight of both thick metal screen and bars. It slightly concerned me, but I couldn’t expect less since they claimed me to be a high-risk. It had its own bathroom with its own single shower. High-risk must have been equivalent to being treated like royalty, because I guarantee I could have gotten used to the room at least. It was clean and white. I sat on the bed. As opposed to being stiff like the Harold facility’s, it was plush and comfortable. “This is awesome compared to the last place I was at,” I told him.
He stood with one hand on the door knob and chuckled. “I bet. Harold is known for being as basic and cheap as possible,” he replied. “If you need anything, knock a few times on the door. I’ll get it for you.”
I waved as he shut the door. A friend was something I had needed, and I found one, though he was the guard. I had the feeling I wasn’t going to enjoy Dirk’s company near as much. I lay back on the bed and yawned, wondering what there was to do in that place. I did the first typical thing: take a nap.
I was awakened nearly two hours later to the sound of someone knocking on the metal door. Groggily, I sat up and rubbed my eyes, spotting a young brunette woman wheeling in a tray of food. “Sorry to wake you, honey,” she murmured. “Dinner time. Just tell Robert when you’re finished.”
I opened the lid over the food and steam rose from it. “What? Hot food?” I muttered aloud with a faint chuckle once the woman had left.
I couldn’t lie-I didn’t remember the last time I’d had a hot meal, so it was a welcome treat. It was then that I was really noticing how much more I enjoyed where I was at the time than the place before. I took a bite of the warm substance that I thought was meat and… IT WAS MEAT! It was a fresh slice of baked turkey. No fillers.
The mashed potatoes were actually potatoes; the vegetables hadn’t been freeze-dried. It was everything I could have asked for. As long as I were to be fed real food the extent of my stay, and as long as I got to stick around with the comfortable bed, I didn’t feel like I’d want to leave. I quickly inhaled the remainder of the food and pushed the tray toward the door, knocking softly. Robert opened it and peeked his head inside. “Done already?” he asked.
I nodded. “I was starving. The crap they served at the Harold place was awful.”
Robert just laughed and took the tray, sliding it out into the hallway. With key in hand, he entered the room and leaned against the door. “It’s going to suck having Dirk come take my place. I didn’t get to chat with you long enough. But, hopefully I’ll be the one who takes you to your first visit in the yard.”
“Sounds like prison,” I muttered raising one eyebrow.”
“It does, doesn’t it?” Robert said with a frown. “It’s not nearly as boring, I promise. Tons of people out there at once with careful supervision and there’s playground equipment, exercise equipment. It’s the only freedom you’re really offered while you’re here, so it’s enjoyable.”
I just smiled and winked. “I’m taking your word for it.”
Steps emitted from the hallway and a voice followed. Dirk’s. “Take your fucking lunch break, already. I’ll watch her while you’re gone.”
I didn’t like the sound of that a bit. I heaved a sigh as Robert smiled one last time, somewhat uneasily. “See you later,” he whispered, shutting the door.
I heard some faint argument outside before Robert left. The door opened again and I saw Dirk’s rather irritated gaze. “What?” I snapped.
What made him think I was going to take any shit from him? “You’re certainly a fuckin’ prize, huh?” he muttered in reply, shutting the door behind him.
“I guess so. Unfortunately, you aren’t the one I killed. Sucks.”
Perhaps it was my mouth that got me in trouble there. Perhaps it was the fact that I essentially told him that I wanted him dead. “What did you just say?” he questioned angrily.
“I said go fall in a damn hole,” I muttered back. “Because personally, it’s not even been two minutes and I’m sick of looking at your face.”
Alright, I’ll give it to him. I was a pretty hateful child-but only toward him. Keys on his belt jingled as he walked toward me. I figured he was going to get in my face, screaming and spitting about how I shouldn’t disrespect him-how I should essentially be worshiping him because he held the only way of getting out of that room on his belt. Instead, he grabbed a handful of my thin, black hair, jerking my head backward. Instantly, the paint caused my eyes to water and my first instinct was to grab for his wrist. Now, a twelve-year-old girl versus an almost middle-aged bodybuilder guard was not fair odds.
He leaned close and I could smell his breath as he opened his mouth to speak. It smelled rancid, an odor of old food and lack of care. It made me want to vomit. “I ought to rip your pretty little scalp off for saying that to me. I’ll give you a chance to redeem yourself and say you’re sorry, little girl.”
I wasn’t a very mean girl. I didn’t usually use profanity. I was only twelve. Aside from my incident at the orphanage and my harsh words, I wasn’t violent. But, some sort of demon caught my tongue at that very moment. Some sort of phantom opted toward using my vocal chords-the phantom of my subconscious. I said what I thought. “Fuck you.”
Dirk clutched my hair tighter, tilting my head back further. He squeezed my chin with his other hand. I tried to pry his fingers off of me to no avail. All I wanted was to tear that bastard away from me. “You’d better start begging, you little bitch,” he growled before removing the hand that held my chin.
It was then that I seriously considered apologizing to make it stop, but I was conflicted. I had never taken anything from anyone before, and I wasn’t going to then either. “I’ll never beg to you,” I spat back.
Dirk yanked me from the bed I sat on and slammed my back against the nearest wall; all the while attached to my hair like it were a lifeline. The next object I came into contact with was the barred window, which hurt far worse than the wall. I cried out, but it didn’t make him cease. No, he was still relentless. He struck me with a balled fist three or four times (who was counting?), sending me against the window again as though I were a pinball. He grabbed me again, once more against the wall. One hand clasped my throat and he lifted me up slightly. I could feel that my toes were no longer touching the floor. I wheezed and strained for oxygen, unable to speak. My fingertips clawed at his hands and wrists, urging him to release me.
“Have you learned your fucking lesson, you little brat? They treat misfits like you so well, when all you’ll do is grow up to be a little hellion,” he muttered, leaning closer to my face. “If I could get away with it, I’d kill your ass here and save Zion the trouble, but he won’t let me do that.”
He dropped me. I collapsed and coughed, inhaling as deeply as I could. My lungs and throat burned. He planted a sharp kick into my ribcage, just hard enough to hurt like hell but not hard enough to break anything. I rolled and hit my head on the underneath of the bed-frame. I clasped my head and heard the door open. He had left. I cried softly where I had curled up in the floor. It was the first time I’d ever wanted to just back down, which wasn’t my personality at all.
I slowly picked myself up. I felt the massive cut in my lip, where I tasted blood from. I was sure that my face was swollen. I felt I had a lot of bruising, the way my face felt. There was no mirror in the room-I suppose it was a suicide prevention thing.
My nose was bleeding, but I was sure it wasn’t broken. It didn’t hurt nearly as bad as my left cheek did. I slowly clawed the blankets and pulled myself into bed. Had there of been a small window on the door or anything, I was sure he’d have been watching me. I wanted Robert back. I needed someone to tell, and someone to cry to. Zion probably would care less, but Robert… surely Robert would have cared at least a little. Again, I lay down, still sobbing softly to myself. I wasn’t aware of the time that had passed, but somewhere while crying, I’d fallen asleep and woken up again. I’d only woken up when I heard voices outside the door.
The door then opened and Robert had returned with a furious and frightened expression on his face. The door shut behind him, but I’d had enough time to catch a sneering Dirk outside the door still. Robert knelt-still damn near taller than I-and reached out toward my face. Nervous and aching, I turned my face a little but he shook his head. “No, Victoria. Don’t. Let me see,” he mumbled quietly.
Instantly, I’d begun to cry again. I couldn’t tell if my tears were more from the pain or the trauma-I’m assuming a strange combination of both. He touched my face softly. His touch was gentle enough but it was still sore. Never would he replace my precious Vincent, the brother I had left behind, but he was a close second. At least in this place, he was a second. Zion found his way into the room afterward, eying me up and down. Dirk had disappeared. “Where did that fucker go?” Robert stated, standing up suddenly.
My respect for him then increased. No matter their previous relationship or no matter the fact that both of them worked in the same place, their attitudes were much different. Robert was intending on defending me. He was very much enraged at what Dirk had done. Zion just shook his head. “He’ll be dealt with later. I’ll find a replacement for her as your partner and her secondary. But for now, I’m a bit concerned about Victoria’s well-being.”
“A bit?!” Robert shouted. “That bastard just beat the shit out of her with no remorse. You’re only slightly concerned?”
Zion just stared at him solemnly. “She can hold her own. Please leave.”
Robert just sighed heavily and brushed aside some of my unruly black hair. “I’ll be back later, okay?”
I just nodded. I really wasn’t sure what to say, or if I could say anything worthwhile at all at that point. Once Robert left, Zion just sighed as well. “It’s a shame we have people like that. Forgive me,” he began. “Alas, you are a strong child. I can see that.”
I wouldn’t realize that his words there meant something in my future, but they did. At the time, I just felt he was complimenting the fact I had no broken bones and wasn’t dead. Oh, but those words… Those words meant something so much more. “We’re going to begin your physicals tomorrow. They’ll last eight weeks. It’s to make sure your body healthy internally. We’ll be careful with your injuries. After that, you will have four weeks of psyche exams. They’re to analyze the physical make-up of your brain, intelligence, sanity and so forth. From there, we’ll figure out what to do with you.”
I just took my eyes off of him and stared at the bed-sheets. “Also, you’re going to be given an ID number after we’re through with the tests. But that’s only if you pass them.”
“Pass…? I thought they were just for evaluation.”
“We’ll get to that later. Until then, behave.”
He then left me alone. Robert poked his head in the door and weakly smiled at me. “Victoria, try to sleep, dear. If you need something to help you sleep, I’ll get it for you, but please, just try to sleep.”
Dear. He called me dear. That term of endearment had never meant so much to me before then. I smiled softly, reassuring him with a nod. “I will.”
I shuffled under my blankets and closed my eyes, waiting for the lights to shut off with the facility lockdown when everyone was due to sleep.
Weeks passed and nothing changed at the psychiatric facility. I was asked a number of times by the other patients what I was in for, like it was some kind of prison where being the most insane was awesome. I quite simply was not crazy-am not, still. So, each time I was asked, I’d respond the same. “I killed a boy.” Then I’d be asked for my age. “Twelve.” That was when the reality struck that innocent, adorable children aren’t always nice. Most of the patients were simply suicidal teenagers. According to the doctors, that was the case anyway.
Rosalina came to wake me one fine morning, chipper as ever. “I’ve got good news!” she chirped, entering the room. “We’re transferring you to another facility because we don’t believe you have anything wrong with you.”
“Good,” I muttered. “Because I am not crazy.”
I think in some moments, I started to somewhat scare the poor nurse. I received very intimidated looks from her. But, I suppose to some extent, that was what I wanted. However, this transfer didn’t sound like it would be a good thing at all. “They’re going to have to run some more advanced tests on you there just to make sure before we can come to a conclusion.”
“I’m not understanding… how it’s good news.”
Rosalina just grinned. “You’ll get out of here, won’t you?”
“Only to get stuck somewhere else.”
After that, I believe she just gave up. “They’re coming to get you in an hour or so. We’ll give you your things before you leave.”
She didn’t give me any time to interject. Instead, she just exited the room and left me sitting on that stiff bed with rumpled sheets and messy hair, wondering what I was being transferred for if they found nothing wrong with me. I was also left wondering if the facility would be a little more welcoming than that place-and if the food would be better. Moments later, the nurse returned telling me that my escort to the new facility had arrived and it was time for me to leave. She wished me luck, which I didn’t understand. I felt maybe she meant it as, “Have fun staying out of prison, kid.”
I was walked downstairs without any restraints which was one of the first oddities I noticed about this trip. Secondly, I was being escorted in a limousine. That definitely threw me off. I stepped in the stretch limo and sat down in the first seat I noticed. I hadn’t quite realized I wasn’t alone yet until the other person within the vehicle spoke to me. “Greetings, Victoria,” a male voice called from within the extended cab.
My eyes turned to find a silver-haired male whose facial features were young and chiseled, but his hair told of age. I couldn’t tell who he was or what he wanted, but it was obvious that whatever facility I was being shipped off to, he was in charge. “Hi,” I said plainly, unsure of what else I was going to say in such an awkward situation.
“You’ll come to know me quite well in due time, but for now, my name is Zion.”
“Funny how your name represents heaven. Are you as pure as your name may suggest?”
Zion’s pearly whites gleamed like malicious fangs more than just a simple smile. “I have no reason to be nothing but that. You’re a very smart young girl, Victoria.”
“That I am,” I replied, crossing my arms. “I can tell when something’s up. And I think there’s something amiss here.”
Zion’s face seemed to tense a little as I stated that. “What seems to be the matter?” he asked softly.
His voice was tender enough, but something in his posture and the way he carried himself seemed vaguely menacing in my eyes. “This situation is off. There is no reason to transport me elsewhere other than juvenile detention if there’s nothing wrong with me. There really is no need for other tests.”
Zion tried to relax himself and I noticed this. “Victoria, you are but a young child. There are just some things that have to be done before you can just be released or sent off. Let the adults handle the business, you worry about what’s going to happen to you afterward,” he told me.
Our conversation felt as though it took an entire hour. However, it was less than fifteen minutes, for we arrived shortly after the conversation ended. Entering the doors of the new facility was like entering another mental facility only as opposed to gray and white, it was strictly white. No, seriously, it was essentially all I saw besides speckles of black and gray. White. I felt as though I were walking into a dream. However, besides the lack of color, it seemed a little bit more pleasant than the Harold facility. Although, I was still focused on the fact I wanted to see more color in these damn places.
The moment we made it to the desk at the front, we were accompanied by two pretty massive guards. One was an African American, built like a freaking brick house though he wore a small, genuinely sweet smile. He sort of resembled a teddy bear, though not as plush. No, it didn’t look like he had a single ounce of fat on him. But he did not seem threatening at all. The second was a shorter, but equally built white guy. He was easily recognizable, being short and stocky. He reminded me of an angry bulldog with his size and the way his eyebrows seemed permanently furrowed. I had a feeling I wouldn’t care about either of them anyway. I sighed as they stood by my arms whilst Zion spent a few moments explaining to put me in a high-security room by myself on the seventh floor. Apparently I was a risk. Zion turned and smirked faintly, a smirk that I remember clearly. It was something menacing, almost predatory. It reminded me most of an alligator. “Enjoy your stay,” he hissed, walking the opposite direction as the two guards led me toward the elevator.
We entered the elevator silently and took it to the seventh floor. As soon as we stepped out, the white guard began complaining about how the black guy was going to take the first guard shift because he was sick of babysitting. And with that, he huffed off down the dim, empty hallway. It was way too silent.
The black guard I was stuck with sighed. “Dirk is very bull-headed,” he commented, “always angry.”
I just smiled faintly. I felt that I could actually get along with this one. “He seems like it,” I replied softly.
It was odd that I was bonding with someone who was going to essentially stalk me for an indefinite amount of time. “Just so you know, my name is Robert. Despite the fact I’m not really supposed to have a friendship with you, it’d just be rude of me not to at least let you know who I am.”
“Who says we can’t be friends?” I asked sincerely. I needed a friend.
“Zion,” he replied softly, “but I’ll make a secret exception. I understand what you’re in here for, but I have faith you will at least spare me, miss assassin.”
He was the first person to say anything about my dreams and not seem like he was mocking me. “I totally would,” I told him. “I seriously want to be one.”
Robert winked at me. “So I heard. You’ve got some big dreams, Victoria.”
“Did they tell you everything about me or something?”
“It’s required since we’re supposedly endangering our lives protecting you. I feel if I just be myself, I won’t be endangering myself. If I act like Dirk, on the other hand, it might be a possibility.” He laughed. His voice and his laugh were equally deep and smooth. Kind. Honest.
I just grinned. “This is true. I’ll avoid beating you up.”
He laughed again. “Good deal.”
He led me to a room in which there was one bed-though it looked much more comfortable-and a chair. There was a window, but I caught the sight of both thick metal screen and bars. It slightly concerned me, but I couldn’t expect less since they claimed me to be a high-risk. It had its own bathroom with its own single shower. High-risk must have been equivalent to being treated like royalty, because I guarantee I could have gotten used to the room at least. It was clean and white. I sat on the bed. As opposed to being stiff like the Harold facility’s, it was plush and comfortable. “This is awesome compared to the last place I was at,” I told him.
He stood with one hand on the door knob and chuckled. “I bet. Harold is known for being as basic and cheap as possible,” he replied. “If you need anything, knock a few times on the door. I’ll get it for you.”
I waved as he shut the door. A friend was something I had needed, and I found one, though he was the guard. I had the feeling I wasn’t going to enjoy Dirk’s company near as much. I lay back on the bed and yawned, wondering what there was to do in that place. I did the first typical thing: take a nap.
I was awakened nearly two hours later to the sound of someone knocking on the metal door. Groggily, I sat up and rubbed my eyes, spotting a young brunette woman wheeling in a tray of food. “Sorry to wake you, honey,” she murmured. “Dinner time. Just tell Robert when you’re finished.”
I opened the lid over the food and steam rose from it. “What? Hot food?” I muttered aloud with a faint chuckle once the woman had left.
I couldn’t lie-I didn’t remember the last time I’d had a hot meal, so it was a welcome treat. It was then that I was really noticing how much more I enjoyed where I was at the time than the place before. I took a bite of the warm substance that I thought was meat and… IT WAS MEAT! It was a fresh slice of baked turkey. No fillers.
The mashed potatoes were actually potatoes; the vegetables hadn’t been freeze-dried. It was everything I could have asked for. As long as I were to be fed real food the extent of my stay, and as long as I got to stick around with the comfortable bed, I didn’t feel like I’d want to leave. I quickly inhaled the remainder of the food and pushed the tray toward the door, knocking softly. Robert opened it and peeked his head inside. “Done already?” he asked.
I nodded. “I was starving. The crap they served at the Harold place was awful.”
Robert just laughed and took the tray, sliding it out into the hallway. With key in hand, he entered the room and leaned against the door. “It’s going to suck having Dirk come take my place. I didn’t get to chat with you long enough. But, hopefully I’ll be the one who takes you to your first visit in the yard.”
“Sounds like prison,” I muttered raising one eyebrow.”
“It does, doesn’t it?” Robert said with a frown. “It’s not nearly as boring, I promise. Tons of people out there at once with careful supervision and there’s playground equipment, exercise equipment. It’s the only freedom you’re really offered while you’re here, so it’s enjoyable.”
I just smiled and winked. “I’m taking your word for it.”
Steps emitted from the hallway and a voice followed. Dirk’s. “Take your fucking lunch break, already. I’ll watch her while you’re gone.”
I didn’t like the sound of that a bit. I heaved a sigh as Robert smiled one last time, somewhat uneasily. “See you later,” he whispered, shutting the door.
I heard some faint argument outside before Robert left. The door opened again and I saw Dirk’s rather irritated gaze. “What?” I snapped.
What made him think I was going to take any shit from him? “You’re certainly a fuckin’ prize, huh?” he muttered in reply, shutting the door behind him.
“I guess so. Unfortunately, you aren’t the one I killed. Sucks.”
Perhaps it was my mouth that got me in trouble there. Perhaps it was the fact that I essentially told him that I wanted him dead. “What did you just say?” he questioned angrily.
“I said go fall in a damn hole,” I muttered back. “Because personally, it’s not even been two minutes and I’m sick of looking at your face.”
Alright, I’ll give it to him. I was a pretty hateful child-but only toward him. Keys on his belt jingled as he walked toward me. I figured he was going to get in my face, screaming and spitting about how I shouldn’t disrespect him-how I should essentially be worshiping him because he held the only way of getting out of that room on his belt. Instead, he grabbed a handful of my thin, black hair, jerking my head backward. Instantly, the paint caused my eyes to water and my first instinct was to grab for his wrist. Now, a twelve-year-old girl versus an almost middle-aged bodybuilder guard was not fair odds.
He leaned close and I could smell his breath as he opened his mouth to speak. It smelled rancid, an odor of old food and lack of care. It made me want to vomit. “I ought to rip your pretty little scalp off for saying that to me. I’ll give you a chance to redeem yourself and say you’re sorry, little girl.”
I wasn’t a very mean girl. I didn’t usually use profanity. I was only twelve. Aside from my incident at the orphanage and my harsh words, I wasn’t violent. But, some sort of demon caught my tongue at that very moment. Some sort of phantom opted toward using my vocal chords-the phantom of my subconscious. I said what I thought. “Fuck you.”
Dirk clutched my hair tighter, tilting my head back further. He squeezed my chin with his other hand. I tried to pry his fingers off of me to no avail. All I wanted was to tear that bastard away from me. “You’d better start begging, you little bitch,” he growled before removing the hand that held my chin.
It was then that I seriously considered apologizing to make it stop, but I was conflicted. I had never taken anything from anyone before, and I wasn’t going to then either. “I’ll never beg to you,” I spat back.
Dirk yanked me from the bed I sat on and slammed my back against the nearest wall; all the while attached to my hair like it were a lifeline. The next object I came into contact with was the barred window, which hurt far worse than the wall. I cried out, but it didn’t make him cease. No, he was still relentless. He struck me with a balled fist three or four times (who was counting?), sending me against the window again as though I were a pinball. He grabbed me again, once more against the wall. One hand clasped my throat and he lifted me up slightly. I could feel that my toes were no longer touching the floor. I wheezed and strained for oxygen, unable to speak. My fingertips clawed at his hands and wrists, urging him to release me.
“Have you learned your fucking lesson, you little brat? They treat misfits like you so well, when all you’ll do is grow up to be a little hellion,” he muttered, leaning closer to my face. “If I could get away with it, I’d kill your ass here and save Zion the trouble, but he won’t let me do that.”
He dropped me. I collapsed and coughed, inhaling as deeply as I could. My lungs and throat burned. He planted a sharp kick into my ribcage, just hard enough to hurt like hell but not hard enough to break anything. I rolled and hit my head on the underneath of the bed-frame. I clasped my head and heard the door open. He had left. I cried softly where I had curled up in the floor. It was the first time I’d ever wanted to just back down, which wasn’t my personality at all.
I slowly picked myself up. I felt the massive cut in my lip, where I tasted blood from. I was sure that my face was swollen. I felt I had a lot of bruising, the way my face felt. There was no mirror in the room-I suppose it was a suicide prevention thing.
My nose was bleeding, but I was sure it wasn’t broken. It didn’t hurt nearly as bad as my left cheek did. I slowly clawed the blankets and pulled myself into bed. Had there of been a small window on the door or anything, I was sure he’d have been watching me. I wanted Robert back. I needed someone to tell, and someone to cry to. Zion probably would care less, but Robert… surely Robert would have cared at least a little. Again, I lay down, still sobbing softly to myself. I wasn’t aware of the time that had passed, but somewhere while crying, I’d fallen asleep and woken up again. I’d only woken up when I heard voices outside the door.
The door then opened and Robert had returned with a furious and frightened expression on his face. The door shut behind him, but I’d had enough time to catch a sneering Dirk outside the door still. Robert knelt-still damn near taller than I-and reached out toward my face. Nervous and aching, I turned my face a little but he shook his head. “No, Victoria. Don’t. Let me see,” he mumbled quietly.
Instantly, I’d begun to cry again. I couldn’t tell if my tears were more from the pain or the trauma-I’m assuming a strange combination of both. He touched my face softly. His touch was gentle enough but it was still sore. Never would he replace my precious Vincent, the brother I had left behind, but he was a close second. At least in this place, he was a second. Zion found his way into the room afterward, eying me up and down. Dirk had disappeared. “Where did that fucker go?” Robert stated, standing up suddenly.
My respect for him then increased. No matter their previous relationship or no matter the fact that both of them worked in the same place, their attitudes were much different. Robert was intending on defending me. He was very much enraged at what Dirk had done. Zion just shook his head. “He’ll be dealt with later. I’ll find a replacement for her as your partner and her secondary. But for now, I’m a bit concerned about Victoria’s well-being.”
“A bit?!” Robert shouted. “That bastard just beat the shit out of her with no remorse. You’re only slightly concerned?”
Zion just stared at him solemnly. “She can hold her own. Please leave.”
Robert just sighed heavily and brushed aside some of my unruly black hair. “I’ll be back later, okay?”
I just nodded. I really wasn’t sure what to say, or if I could say anything worthwhile at all at that point. Once Robert left, Zion just sighed as well. “It’s a shame we have people like that. Forgive me,” he began. “Alas, you are a strong child. I can see that.”
I wouldn’t realize that his words there meant something in my future, but they did. At the time, I just felt he was complimenting the fact I had no broken bones and wasn’t dead. Oh, but those words… Those words meant something so much more. “We’re going to begin your physicals tomorrow. They’ll last eight weeks. It’s to make sure your body healthy internally. We’ll be careful with your injuries. After that, you will have four weeks of psyche exams. They’re to analyze the physical make-up of your brain, intelligence, sanity and so forth. From there, we’ll figure out what to do with you.”
I just took my eyes off of him and stared at the bed-sheets. “Also, you’re going to be given an ID number after we’re through with the tests. But that’s only if you pass them.”
“Pass…? I thought they were just for evaluation.”
“We’ll get to that later. Until then, behave.”
He then left me alone. Robert poked his head in the door and weakly smiled at me. “Victoria, try to sleep, dear. If you need something to help you sleep, I’ll get it for you, but please, just try to sleep.”
Dear. He called me dear. That term of endearment had never meant so much to me before then. I smiled softly, reassuring him with a nod. “I will.”
I shuffled under my blankets and closed my eyes, waiting for the lights to shut off with the facility lockdown when everyone was due to sleep.