you're living all over me
For the past month or so (it seems longer), dad's been on vacation, so he's home all the time and the tv's always on. I wake up, and there he is, watching TCM. I come home from work, and there he is, watching Law and Order: CI or whatever game's on. During the day, I dread going into the kitchen, lest I have to either deal with him physically or the sounds of Ben Matlock winning another case while I do the dishes. At night, I retreat to the other end of the apartment, but it doesn't matter--the sound from the tv seems to waft down the hall, as if to remind me that he's there. About the only way I can get away from it is by strapping on my headphones and cranking the volume.
Yesterday, I was making a little box of spaghetti to take to work. Suddenly, he decided that right then was a perfect time to clean the kitchen. While I guess that I should be glad that he was cleaning something at all, it was tight going there for a while, two adults trying to opposite things done in a tiny little apartment kitchen. Not fun. And then, he left for his hockey game at the exact same time I was leaving for work. Since we take the same bus, he sat next to me, crossed his arms, and infringed on my "me time." Not by talking or anything, but by preventing me from unfurling my earbuds and jacking into my Nano. I suppose I could have, but it would have just been weird.
I almost went somewhere this week. I was actually closer to finalizing the plans and buying the tickets and just leaving for a week than most people will ever know. I regret the plans falling apart now, if only because the walls of my apartment and my life feel more confining than ever. Lately, I've had this itch--and for once, it isn't the Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis. Not directly, anyway. I don't know what it is and I don't know how to satisfy it--all my usual scratching doesn't work like it used to--it's just there, daring me to do something about it, something soon before the walls of my life close in even tighter around me and I can't even do anything anymore. But what?
Yesterday, I was making a little box of spaghetti to take to work. Suddenly, he decided that right then was a perfect time to clean the kitchen. While I guess that I should be glad that he was cleaning something at all, it was tight going there for a while, two adults trying to opposite things done in a tiny little apartment kitchen. Not fun. And then, he left for his hockey game at the exact same time I was leaving for work. Since we take the same bus, he sat next to me, crossed his arms, and infringed on my "me time." Not by talking or anything, but by preventing me from unfurling my earbuds and jacking into my Nano. I suppose I could have, but it would have just been weird.
I almost went somewhere this week. I was actually closer to finalizing the plans and buying the tickets and just leaving for a week than most people will ever know. I regret the plans falling apart now, if only because the walls of my apartment and my life feel more confining than ever. Lately, I've had this itch--and for once, it isn't the Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis. Not directly, anyway. I don't know what it is and I don't know how to satisfy it--all my usual scratching doesn't work like it used to--it's just there, daring me to do something about it, something soon before the walls of my life close in even tighter around me and I can't even do anything anymore. But what?