Things I wrote when I was Fifteen
Yesterday, I was browsing my “box of memories” which contains letters, candy wrappers, conversations on scratch papers, dried flowers…and anything nostalgic you can think of. I had it since I was in elementary. Imagine what bizarre things you’ll find in there.
I came across this bundle of ¼ intermediate papers with red and blue G-tech ink all over them. It was my reflections when I read The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren. I assume most of you know that book. For those who don’t, it’s the book which has 30 chapters. Each day, you read one chapter and reflect on it. I never got to finish it. I only made it to Day 4.
Now, after reading my entries, I can’t help but think how five years ago, I was just this girl who had so many plans in life. And now, life is staring me in the eye as if challenging me if I can stand by the things I promise I will do and overcome.
___
Just for fun, I’d like to share my entries with you.
DISCLAIMER: I was only 15 when I wrote these.
Day 1: April 4, 2008 (It All Starts with God)
I have always thought that God is always by my side. Whenever I want something or I think of my dreams/goals, I call Him. After reading this chapter, I realized that I was selfish because I only think about myself. I know now that without God there would be no ME. He has given me many opportunities and chances. Sometimes I forget to thank Him for that. Now, my passion for writing would serve as my reminder to thank Him. Without God I wouldn’t have my talent in writing which I love very much. This passion of mine will remind me that God gave me a purpose.
Day 2: April 5, 2008 (You Are Not an Accident)
I am ugly. I’m struggling to accept my eyebrows because they are very bushy. And my ears are very big! Also, I am thin. I feel like people think I’m ugly because of these. Also, people hate me because they think I’m putting them down. Sometimes, I don’t want to excel anymore. You know, I look like an anorexic person because I’m thin and tall. But I know I’m not like that. I love to eat. I also hate that I’m flat-chested. This chapter encouraged me to think that I am not an accident and I should focus on my good side. I just can’t see it right now.
Day 3: April 6, 2008 (What Drives Your Life?)
Most people are driven by guilt.
My past hurt me and tortured my dignity. First, the past of being put down by people. And second, the past of my first heartbreak. These are the reasons why I really want to prove myself.
Most people are driven by fear.
My greatest fear is being judged. I’m afraid of what others might say about me. But I am now trying to overcome that.
Most people are driven by the need of approval.
This is the story of my whole life. Now, I realized that the only person I should please is myself.
Day 4: April 7, 2008 (Made to Last Forever)
One of my secrets is that I am afraid to die. I fear to be in a coffin, not breathing, worms feeding of on me and decaying, turning into ash…stuff like that. But I realize that this life is only temporary. And that I shouldn’t be afraid to die. Why would I be? After all, I already experienced it. It’s like you’re only sleeping.
I came across this bundle of ¼ intermediate papers with red and blue G-tech ink all over them. It was my reflections when I read The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren. I assume most of you know that book. For those who don’t, it’s the book which has 30 chapters. Each day, you read one chapter and reflect on it. I never got to finish it. I only made it to Day 4.
Now, after reading my entries, I can’t help but think how five years ago, I was just this girl who had so many plans in life. And now, life is staring me in the eye as if challenging me if I can stand by the things I promise I will do and overcome.
___
Just for fun, I’d like to share my entries with you.
DISCLAIMER: I was only 15 when I wrote these.
Day 1: April 4, 2008 (It All Starts with God)
I have always thought that God is always by my side. Whenever I want something or I think of my dreams/goals, I call Him. After reading this chapter, I realized that I was selfish because I only think about myself. I know now that without God there would be no ME. He has given me many opportunities and chances. Sometimes I forget to thank Him for that. Now, my passion for writing would serve as my reminder to thank Him. Without God I wouldn’t have my talent in writing which I love very much. This passion of mine will remind me that God gave me a purpose.
Day 2: April 5, 2008 (You Are Not an Accident)
I am ugly. I’m struggling to accept my eyebrows because they are very bushy. And my ears are very big! Also, I am thin. I feel like people think I’m ugly because of these. Also, people hate me because they think I’m putting them down. Sometimes, I don’t want to excel anymore. You know, I look like an anorexic person because I’m thin and tall. But I know I’m not like that. I love to eat. I also hate that I’m flat-chested. This chapter encouraged me to think that I am not an accident and I should focus on my good side. I just can’t see it right now.
Day 3: April 6, 2008 (What Drives Your Life?)
Most people are driven by guilt.
My past hurt me and tortured my dignity. First, the past of being put down by people. And second, the past of my first heartbreak. These are the reasons why I really want to prove myself.
Most people are driven by fear.
My greatest fear is being judged. I’m afraid of what others might say about me. But I am now trying to overcome that.
Most people are driven by the need of approval.
This is the story of my whole life. Now, I realized that the only person I should please is myself.
Day 4: April 7, 2008 (Made to Last Forever)
One of my secrets is that I am afraid to die. I fear to be in a coffin, not breathing, worms feeding of on me and decaying, turning into ash…stuff like that. But I realize that this life is only temporary. And that I shouldn’t be afraid to die. Why would I be? After all, I already experienced it. It’s like you’re only sleeping.