me, myself, and i are all in love with you....
Totally stressed out, why? because of me. Because I change my mind a lot and dont let others know and that creates problems. Obsessiveness and borderline stalkerishness is not cool, even if you claim to be drunk. I'm so mad right now. But the only person I can be mad at is myself...although being that obsessive with 16 text messages and 4 unanswered phone calls is a little ridiculous. I actually turned my phone off because I couldnt deal with it anymore. OF course this is totally cryptic for most of you, but if you wanna know, just ask. I have a little drama in my life lately. And conflicting views with others and within myself is causing headaches. I guess we all just want to have our cake and eat it too. And apparently in life, "cake" is not edible. Lol.
I have the day off tomorrow but I think its going to still be busy. I have to attend a museum Education program for my Museum Studies class and write a paper about it and since I procrasinate, the only museum that has any tomorrow is at the Museum Center at Union terminal. So that should be interesting. And then I think I may take the rest of the day to curl up in bed and think. Just think and write and figure out what the constants are in life right now and whats still up in the air. Sometimes I think I could have solved a lot by doing the marry early plan...but then I think about it and thats terrifying as well. Guess theres no real solution. At times I feel like I'm playing a card game that I dont know all the rules to- very frustrating.
And then I get nervous when people invest too much in me and that makes me feel pressured and stressed. Because I know that I mess up sometimes and I'm not perfect and I dont like when that affects other people.
Wheres the Easy Button?? Lol, or atleast a "Re-do" button where I can start situations over. That would be awesome.
So yeah. I feel better after venting. I feel almost as spasdic as this weather in Ohio...
I have the day off tomorrow but I think its going to still be busy. I have to attend a museum Education program for my Museum Studies class and write a paper about it and since I procrasinate, the only museum that has any tomorrow is at the Museum Center at Union terminal. So that should be interesting. And then I think I may take the rest of the day to curl up in bed and think. Just think and write and figure out what the constants are in life right now and whats still up in the air. Sometimes I think I could have solved a lot by doing the marry early plan...but then I think about it and thats terrifying as well. Guess theres no real solution. At times I feel like I'm playing a card game that I dont know all the rules to- very frustrating.
And then I get nervous when people invest too much in me and that makes me feel pressured and stressed. Because I know that I mess up sometimes and I'm not perfect and I dont like when that affects other people.
Wheres the Easy Button?? Lol, or atleast a "Re-do" button where I can start situations over. That would be awesome.
So yeah. I feel better after venting. I feel almost as spasdic as this weather in Ohio...