I must vent.
Today I received an Email from my son's teacher telling me that Younger Son missed turning in a major assignment. She went into great detail about how she'd informed the class about the project three weeks ago, that the dates were posted on her web page for the school site, and how she was accepting late work only through tomorrow.
I snapped at Younger Son, who is upset of course, and then I had to sit down and compose what amounted to an apology to the teacher with the added comment that Younger Son would take a zero for the project, because let's face it--I am NOT going to help him collect fifteen different leaves, rub or scan them, list all the latin names, the leaf edges, the leaf types and collection sites/dates in the THREE hours I have left before I need to get to bed.
I'm pissed both at my son and at his teacher.
My son is thoughtless and forgetful. I know he needs prompting and I know he needs better ways of organizing his schoolwork. Those are matters I can help with and I know it.
The other part of all this though is murkier, and a matter of personal irritation that boils down to this ugly truth--When it comes to major projects, my kids suck. *I* am the one who ends up making the posters or mounting the leaves or drawing the flowcharts or typing up the papers. The majority of the damned work is done my ME, and I know for a fact that it's true for a LOT of parents out there as well.
Yes, we do our kid's assignments. We do them because we're better at them, because we don't want our kids to get failing grades, and because WE KNOW EVERYONE ELSE S' PARENTS ARE DOING THE SAME THING!
You know how many California missions are built by students alone? Um, none. Same goes for state reports, science volcanoes and a shit-load of other things that are assigned and required.
And I for one am so frustrated by this. I already work all day doing my own job. I really don't WANT to come home and have to 'design an energy bar that's nutritionally sound.' I don't WANT to map out a timeline on the history of bubble gum. I don't WANT to spend my precious free time doing these assignments and yet if I don't--
If I actually let my kid do the work?
It will be a kid production and look like shit against all the other parent-generated stuff.
And despite whatever rubric the teacher puts out I know damned WELL that their work won't be evaluated for what it is.
It's a vicious cycle, and in this ever-increasingly competitive world I feel like both a fraud and a failure as a parent and a teacher.
Okay, it felt good to actually say that. I'm sure lots of you out there will be appalled at this, but there might be a few of you who might be nodding.
I snapped at Younger Son, who is upset of course, and then I had to sit down and compose what amounted to an apology to the teacher with the added comment that Younger Son would take a zero for the project, because let's face it--I am NOT going to help him collect fifteen different leaves, rub or scan them, list all the latin names, the leaf edges, the leaf types and collection sites/dates in the THREE hours I have left before I need to get to bed.
I'm pissed both at my son and at his teacher.
My son is thoughtless and forgetful. I know he needs prompting and I know he needs better ways of organizing his schoolwork. Those are matters I can help with and I know it.
The other part of all this though is murkier, and a matter of personal irritation that boils down to this ugly truth--When it comes to major projects, my kids suck. *I* am the one who ends up making the posters or mounting the leaves or drawing the flowcharts or typing up the papers. The majority of the damned work is done my ME, and I know for a fact that it's true for a LOT of parents out there as well.
Yes, we do our kid's assignments. We do them because we're better at them, because we don't want our kids to get failing grades, and because WE KNOW EVERYONE ELSE S' PARENTS ARE DOING THE SAME THING!
You know how many California missions are built by students alone? Um, none. Same goes for state reports, science volcanoes and a shit-load of other things that are assigned and required.
And I for one am so frustrated by this. I already work all day doing my own job. I really don't WANT to come home and have to 'design an energy bar that's nutritionally sound.' I don't WANT to map out a timeline on the history of bubble gum. I don't WANT to spend my precious free time doing these assignments and yet if I don't--
If I actually let my kid do the work?
It will be a kid production and look like shit against all the other parent-generated stuff.
And despite whatever rubric the teacher puts out I know damned WELL that their work won't be evaluated for what it is.
It's a vicious cycle, and in this ever-increasingly competitive world I feel like both a fraud and a failure as a parent and a teacher.
Okay, it felt good to actually say that. I'm sure lots of you out there will be appalled at this, but there might be a few of you who might be nodding.