From cynicism to irony to laughter (Such a vicious cycle)
For Yesterday is but a Dream,
And Tomorrow is only a Vision;
But Today well lived makes every
Yesterday a Dream of Happiness, and every
Tomorrow a Vision of Hope.
A week or so ago, a good friend of mine told me that I've become cynical, and to quote her "para wala ka nang optimism miggy". At first, I pondered whether or not it was that evident that I was/am reeling from the turmoil of damaged friendships, relationships, and who could forget the all-important deteriorating acads life. (forgive my parallelism error) For a while I decided to stick with it, roll with the punches until I reached a point when I found everything so pointless, so irrelevant that I wanted to quit. Quit EVERYTHING.
As I was cleaning my room contemplating all this. I saw my black journal from high school. When I was reading it, I thought I had become a totally different person from who I was. The past me wouldn't just quit, I would've just kept trying even if it was hopeless. The poem I posted above is one of my favorites. Everytime I read it, I feel empowered knowing I might have even the slightest potential to achieve something, or the power to change my future. And it was then I remembered my sister, ate Guita and some of her last words to me before leaving for the US. :) She taught me to never run away from my problems and that I should face them no matter what for my sake and the sake of the people I love.
So to all of you concerned, I want to first apologize for acting the way I did. You know who you are. And to Bea, I'm sorry for being so un-understanding (see! you're in my LJ ;p). To Mandt's sorry if I let you guys down several times in the past (I'll make up for it!) D2! Sorry for the past mistakes assumptions etc. amigo >_< CDM! Sorry for getting you involved in all that crap, and being more of an annoyance lately. >_<
As Sir Jal said, we are a society of sad people. we easily relate with sad emotions, sad songs, sad everything. But society was never really my thing. haha. yey go hopeless baseless stupid Optimism :) makes me wanna do artzy stuff again.
P.S. If you can read lj's pala, letters to the past me are cool too. :) but since you don't read lj ata, you will never know i admitted defeat
P.P.S. When you've read this, sorry for quoting sir Jal too! Di ako gaya-gaya! and thanks for your honest, sincere advice and opinion ;) It means a lot to me, thanks.
P.P.P.S. It's alright. I know there's more to you than being just that, and you certainly can be. You deserve to grow whether here, abroad, or anywhere in the world. So just be happy. Sorry for my outbursts lately. haha. pressure. >_<
Look well therefore to this Day!
Such is the Salutation of the Dawn.
Coming up this week: Cyb's birthday dinner! EVERYONE MUST GO. OR ELSE. wahahahahha
"Dreams nourish the soul, just as food nourishes the body." but oh what i wouldn't do for pritchon now. >:)
And Tomorrow is only a Vision;
But Today well lived makes every
Yesterday a Dream of Happiness, and every
Tomorrow a Vision of Hope.
A week or so ago, a good friend of mine told me that I've become cynical, and to quote her "para wala ka nang optimism miggy". At first, I pondered whether or not it was that evident that I was/am reeling from the turmoil of damaged friendships, relationships, and who could forget the all-important deteriorating acads life. (forgive my parallelism error) For a while I decided to stick with it, roll with the punches until I reached a point when I found everything so pointless, so irrelevant that I wanted to quit. Quit EVERYTHING.
As I was cleaning my room contemplating all this. I saw my black journal from high school. When I was reading it, I thought I had become a totally different person from who I was. The past me wouldn't just quit, I would've just kept trying even if it was hopeless. The poem I posted above is one of my favorites. Everytime I read it, I feel empowered knowing I might have even the slightest potential to achieve something, or the power to change my future. And it was then I remembered my sister, ate Guita and some of her last words to me before leaving for the US. :) She taught me to never run away from my problems and that I should face them no matter what for my sake and the sake of the people I love.
So to all of you concerned, I want to first apologize for acting the way I did. You know who you are. And to Bea, I'm sorry for being so un-understanding (see! you're in my LJ ;p). To Mandt's sorry if I let you guys down several times in the past (I'll make up for it!) D2! Sorry for the past mistakes assumptions etc. amigo >_< CDM! Sorry for getting you involved in all that crap, and being more of an annoyance lately. >_<
As Sir Jal said, we are a society of sad people. we easily relate with sad emotions, sad songs, sad everything. But society was never really my thing. haha. yey go hopeless baseless stupid Optimism :) makes me wanna do artzy stuff again.
P.S. If you can read lj's pala, letters to the past me are cool too. :) but since you don't read lj ata, you will never know i admitted defeat
P.P.S. When you've read this, sorry for quoting sir Jal too! Di ako gaya-gaya! and thanks for your honest, sincere advice and opinion ;) It means a lot to me, thanks.
P.P.P.S. It's alright. I know there's more to you than being just that, and you certainly can be. You deserve to grow whether here, abroad, or anywhere in the world. So just be happy. Sorry for my outbursts lately. haha. pressure. >_<
Look well therefore to this Day!
Such is the Salutation of the Dawn.
Coming up this week: Cyb's birthday dinner! EVERYONE MUST GO. OR ELSE. wahahahahha
"Dreams nourish the soul, just as food nourishes the body." but oh what i wouldn't do for pritchon now. >:)