In Defence of Megatron's Honour
This was pretty much the first thing I wrote after Nice Hands, Wanna Frag?, and is basically a sequel, though neither are technically Sparks cannon. This just follows the 'Alex turns Cybertronian' thought to the inevitable 'and everyone else finds out she's fragging Megatron' conclusion. :P
Title: In Defence of Megatron's Honour
Part: 3/3
Rating: T
Setting: Sparks AU, which is a 2007 movieverse based AU
Pairings/Characters: Optimus, Megatron/OFC Alex, mentions of Sideswipe and others.
Summary: It wouldn't have been so bad if it hadn't been Sideswipe that had found out.
Notes: The last part of a trilogy of Sparks-AU bits, with the previous parts being Nice Hands, Wanna Frag? and Fred the Martian.
---
It wouldn't have been so bad if it hadn't been Sideswipe that had found out that there was more to Alex and Megatron's friendship than driving Optimus to glitch. But no, the most notorious troublemaker in either faction, the one with a twin that was as violent as he was loyal to his Prime, had to decide that he couldn't let the mystery of just how Alex knew about interfacing slide. So he put an override into the lock on her door, and interrupted where he wasn't wanted. The subsequent revelation was, of course, all over the Valley within an hour. And Optimus was, naturally, the last to find out.
The Prime only discovered something was going on, in fact, when he happened to overhear several of his more loyal, if misguided, soldiers trying to figure out how to get around the Allspark's protection of Megatron so they could lynch him. Since, of course, the former Decepticon leader had to be taking advantage of the new femme. That was about the point that Optimus realized that Alex's polite, slightly nervous comm request to him an hour earlier to 'see him whenever he had a moment,' was perhaps a bit more urgent than she'd let on. A quick comm to her received the reply that 'they' were in her quarters, and that the lock had been reset so that only 'they' and the Prime could enter.
"- think it's possible? I mean, they're plotting how to get around the very protections that would make such stupidity impossible!" Alex was glaring out the window in her quarters at the group of Autobots that could be seen plotting below when Optimus entered. She seemed unaware of the Prime's entrance, but Megatron, lounging comfortably on her couch, looked lazily over to Optimus, an amused smirk in place, as he replied.
"They're soft-sparked glitches who are trying to defend your honor. You should be flattered."
"It's not their place to defend my honor, if I even had any! And besides, the whole 'defending someone's honor' thing is blatantly stupid and unfair. I mean, who decides which party has the offended honor, anyways? Shouldn't deciding that one person needs their honor defended imply an insult against the other party, meaning they need their honor defended?!" Megatron looked over to the femme at the window, looking like he was barely holding in laughter.
"Are you saying that I need someone to defend my honor now?"
"Yes! Well -"
Megatron burst out laughing. It was a full, honest laugh, the likes of which Optimus hadn't heard from his brother in an age, and he couldn't help but smile as well
"And who would you recommend to defend his honor?" the Prime asked, so that his brother wouldn't have to reply. Alex whirled away from the window, her optics wide as she realized just what Optimus had heard. Then she scowled, glaring at both him and Megatron.
"Well you are his brother," she said snippily. Megatron laughed harder, and Optimus himself couldn't help but chuckle at the thought of the looks on his Autobot's faces if he declared he was defending Megatron's honor in this case.
"Can I assume, then, that Sideswipe misunderstood the situation?" the Prime asked after a moment, feeling a weight lift off him at the thought.
Except Megatron abruptly stopped laughing, and Alex was pointedly looking everywhere but at him.
"If by 'misunderstood', you mean he assumed coercion where there was none..." the femme trailed off, sounding exceptionally nervous. Optimus stared, aware that Megatron was watching him almost warily.
"I...really?" Optimus was more confused than anything else. "I knew about that time when you were human, but you were both intoxicated, and I assumed..."
"Wait, you knew about that?" Alex said with surprise.
"You don't know that I knew?" Optimus replied with equal surprise. "I thought -"
"That we knew and were only acting friendly to remind you of it and drive you glitched, brother?" Megatron was amused again.
"Exactly," Optimus said after a moment. "So then all this time..."
"Not all this time," Alex hastened to assure him. "There was only the once when I was human, but once I changed, well, um."
"Since then, yes," Megatron said, smirking. Optimus opened and closed his mouth and few times, unsure what to say.
"It could be worse?" Alex said uncertainly.
"Are you saying I'm a bad choice?" Megatron drawled.
"We both agreed we were terrible choices the first time," Alex said with dignity that fled almost as soon as she managed to summon it fully.
"Perhaps, but I think we've since proven otherwise, which means that your implication impinges on my honor. Optimus, I believe it's your duty to defend me now," Megatron commanded with authority. He'd barely finished speaking when something small, ovoid, and orange hit him with a wet splat on the side of the head. His expression changed to one of disgust as he started brushing off the orange goo that was now stuck to him. Optimus looked to Alex, and found her staring placidly back at him, a small, pleased smile in place.
"Jell-O? In a balloon?" he asked incredulously, his scanners having told him everything he needed to know.
"What better projectile to hit an Allspark-protected Decepticon with? It's squishy and organic, yet does no lasting damage," the femme said innocently.
"Tell that to the stains on my armor!" Megatron growled.
"It's not my fault that Jell-O dyes are strong enough to colour your armor," Alex said brightly, and Optimus's optics widened slightly as he recalled several suspicious stains on his brother's armor that had taken a few weeks to disappear. Looking back at the mech in question, Optimus realized that half of Megatron's face was already showing a bit of a copper tinge.
"Perhaps that would be the best solution to the mob forming outside?" Optimus said, cocking his head to the side, and Megatron paused in his removal of the Jell-O to glare balefully at his brother.
"I will not have it known to that half-clocked perverted glitch that soft and squishy items can still be used as projectiles against me. If he catches even the slightest hint of such an idea, I am utterly certain that I will have all manner of ridiculous things thrown at me."
"Aww, but I hear the marketing team has just come out with the cutest Optimus plushes!" Alex gushed.
"Don't make me make you mute it," Megatron said with a glare.
"Gosh, really? Do you promise?" Alex said brightly.
"I would rather not have to see that," Optimus interrupted, feeling slightly ill as he listened to what, before today, he would have assumed was them sniping at each other, but now recognized as flirting.
"I think enough optics have seen that today already," Alex grumbled, turning back to the window. "High grade?!" Optimus, curious, came to look over her shoulder. He forced himself to ignore the fresh nicks and scratches in her plating as he peered down at the gathering of mechs.
"They appear to be spiking it," Optimus said with a sigh. "I think I'd better go diffuse them."
"Probably a good idea," Megatron drawled, and Optimus gave him a weary look.
"Try not to let out any other inflammatory secrets. And don't accept energon from anyone, just in case," the Prime said as he headed for the door. As he was about to open it, he turned to give his brother a thoughtful look. "It might also help if you spoke with the Decepticons."
"If they decide to do anything about this, nothing I say will stop them anymore," Megatron said with a snort. "You're better off asking Soundwave to 'talk' to them." Optimus grimaced, and Megatron chuckled. "Have no fear brother, I'll be the receiver for any retribution from both sides."
"Which is totally and completely unfair!" Alex burst out, and Optimus left as she launched into another rant. He'd say he pitied his brother, but he suspected Megatron enjoyed it.
---
Alex and Megatron stayed conspicuously hidden away in her quarters for the rest of the day. Optimus tried not to think about what they might be doing to pass the time, just as he was doing his best not to listen to any of the whispers and mutterings around him in the Valley Bar that night. He retreated to his quarters early, and was going to speak with Elita, but a thump against the wall that his quarters shared with Alex's made him shudder and force himself into an early recharge instead. Ratchet was always saying he wasn't getting enough, after all.
The next morning, Alex and Megatron finally showed their faceplates. They'd clearly made use of Alex's washracks before going out, but all that did was make them clean and conspicuous as they walked into the bar side by side. Everyone fell silent at their entrance, and while Megatron paid the unusual attention no mind, Alex locked optics on the energon dispenser and clamped her lipplates shut, looking one wrong move away from exploding. They got their energon without incident, though, and took their seats at their usual table - only this time, Megatron sat down next to Alex, instead of across from her, and casually draped his arm across her shoulders. His entire bearing screamed 'mine', to say nothing of what his field was doing, and that seemed to be the straw that broke Alex's fragile hold on her temper. With an enraged hiss, she shoved his arm off her shoulders and then upended his cube of energon in his lap before grabbing her own and bouncing up, jumping over the table and stalking out. Megatron sat through it all calmly, then once she was gone, turned and let his optics settle lazily on Sideswipe. Once he was sure he had the red warrior's attention, he slouched languidly into his seat and smirked.
Very shortly, there were no less than five unconscious Autobots in the bar.
- THE END -
Title: In Defence of Megatron's Honour
Part: 3/3
Rating: T
Setting: Sparks AU, which is a 2007 movieverse based AU
Pairings/Characters: Optimus, Megatron/OFC Alex, mentions of Sideswipe and others.
Summary: It wouldn't have been so bad if it hadn't been Sideswipe that had found out.
Notes: The last part of a trilogy of Sparks-AU bits, with the previous parts being Nice Hands, Wanna Frag? and Fred the Martian.
---
It wouldn't have been so bad if it hadn't been Sideswipe that had found out that there was more to Alex and Megatron's friendship than driving Optimus to glitch. But no, the most notorious troublemaker in either faction, the one with a twin that was as violent as he was loyal to his Prime, had to decide that he couldn't let the mystery of just how Alex knew about interfacing slide. So he put an override into the lock on her door, and interrupted where he wasn't wanted. The subsequent revelation was, of course, all over the Valley within an hour. And Optimus was, naturally, the last to find out.
The Prime only discovered something was going on, in fact, when he happened to overhear several of his more loyal, if misguided, soldiers trying to figure out how to get around the Allspark's protection of Megatron so they could lynch him. Since, of course, the former Decepticon leader had to be taking advantage of the new femme. That was about the point that Optimus realized that Alex's polite, slightly nervous comm request to him an hour earlier to 'see him whenever he had a moment,' was perhaps a bit more urgent than she'd let on. A quick comm to her received the reply that 'they' were in her quarters, and that the lock had been reset so that only 'they' and the Prime could enter.
"- think it's possible? I mean, they're plotting how to get around the very protections that would make such stupidity impossible!" Alex was glaring out the window in her quarters at the group of Autobots that could be seen plotting below when Optimus entered. She seemed unaware of the Prime's entrance, but Megatron, lounging comfortably on her couch, looked lazily over to Optimus, an amused smirk in place, as he replied.
"They're soft-sparked glitches who are trying to defend your honor. You should be flattered."
"It's not their place to defend my honor, if I even had any! And besides, the whole 'defending someone's honor' thing is blatantly stupid and unfair. I mean, who decides which party has the offended honor, anyways? Shouldn't deciding that one person needs their honor defended imply an insult against the other party, meaning they need their honor defended?!" Megatron looked over to the femme at the window, looking like he was barely holding in laughter.
"Are you saying that I need someone to defend my honor now?"
"Yes! Well -"
Megatron burst out laughing. It was a full, honest laugh, the likes of which Optimus hadn't heard from his brother in an age, and he couldn't help but smile as well
"And who would you recommend to defend his honor?" the Prime asked, so that his brother wouldn't have to reply. Alex whirled away from the window, her optics wide as she realized just what Optimus had heard. Then she scowled, glaring at both him and Megatron.
"Well you are his brother," she said snippily. Megatron laughed harder, and Optimus himself couldn't help but chuckle at the thought of the looks on his Autobot's faces if he declared he was defending Megatron's honor in this case.
"Can I assume, then, that Sideswipe misunderstood the situation?" the Prime asked after a moment, feeling a weight lift off him at the thought.
Except Megatron abruptly stopped laughing, and Alex was pointedly looking everywhere but at him.
"If by 'misunderstood', you mean he assumed coercion where there was none..." the femme trailed off, sounding exceptionally nervous. Optimus stared, aware that Megatron was watching him almost warily.
"I...really?" Optimus was more confused than anything else. "I knew about that time when you were human, but you were both intoxicated, and I assumed..."
"Wait, you knew about that?" Alex said with surprise.
"You don't know that I knew?" Optimus replied with equal surprise. "I thought -"
"That we knew and were only acting friendly to remind you of it and drive you glitched, brother?" Megatron was amused again.
"Exactly," Optimus said after a moment. "So then all this time..."
"Not all this time," Alex hastened to assure him. "There was only the once when I was human, but once I changed, well, um."
"Since then, yes," Megatron said, smirking. Optimus opened and closed his mouth and few times, unsure what to say.
"It could be worse?" Alex said uncertainly.
"Are you saying I'm a bad choice?" Megatron drawled.
"We both agreed we were terrible choices the first time," Alex said with dignity that fled almost as soon as she managed to summon it fully.
"Perhaps, but I think we've since proven otherwise, which means that your implication impinges on my honor. Optimus, I believe it's your duty to defend me now," Megatron commanded with authority. He'd barely finished speaking when something small, ovoid, and orange hit him with a wet splat on the side of the head. His expression changed to one of disgust as he started brushing off the orange goo that was now stuck to him. Optimus looked to Alex, and found her staring placidly back at him, a small, pleased smile in place.
"Jell-O? In a balloon?" he asked incredulously, his scanners having told him everything he needed to know.
"What better projectile to hit an Allspark-protected Decepticon with? It's squishy and organic, yet does no lasting damage," the femme said innocently.
"Tell that to the stains on my armor!" Megatron growled.
"It's not my fault that Jell-O dyes are strong enough to colour your armor," Alex said brightly, and Optimus's optics widened slightly as he recalled several suspicious stains on his brother's armor that had taken a few weeks to disappear. Looking back at the mech in question, Optimus realized that half of Megatron's face was already showing a bit of a copper tinge.
"Perhaps that would be the best solution to the mob forming outside?" Optimus said, cocking his head to the side, and Megatron paused in his removal of the Jell-O to glare balefully at his brother.
"I will not have it known to that half-clocked perverted glitch that soft and squishy items can still be used as projectiles against me. If he catches even the slightest hint of such an idea, I am utterly certain that I will have all manner of ridiculous things thrown at me."
"Aww, but I hear the marketing team has just come out with the cutest Optimus plushes!" Alex gushed.
"Don't make me make you mute it," Megatron said with a glare.
"Gosh, really? Do you promise?" Alex said brightly.
"I would rather not have to see that," Optimus interrupted, feeling slightly ill as he listened to what, before today, he would have assumed was them sniping at each other, but now recognized as flirting.
"I think enough optics have seen that today already," Alex grumbled, turning back to the window. "High grade?!" Optimus, curious, came to look over her shoulder. He forced himself to ignore the fresh nicks and scratches in her plating as he peered down at the gathering of mechs.
"They appear to be spiking it," Optimus said with a sigh. "I think I'd better go diffuse them."
"Probably a good idea," Megatron drawled, and Optimus gave him a weary look.
"Try not to let out any other inflammatory secrets. And don't accept energon from anyone, just in case," the Prime said as he headed for the door. As he was about to open it, he turned to give his brother a thoughtful look. "It might also help if you spoke with the Decepticons."
"If they decide to do anything about this, nothing I say will stop them anymore," Megatron said with a snort. "You're better off asking Soundwave to 'talk' to them." Optimus grimaced, and Megatron chuckled. "Have no fear brother, I'll be the receiver for any retribution from both sides."
"Which is totally and completely unfair!" Alex burst out, and Optimus left as she launched into another rant. He'd say he pitied his brother, but he suspected Megatron enjoyed it.
---
Alex and Megatron stayed conspicuously hidden away in her quarters for the rest of the day. Optimus tried not to think about what they might be doing to pass the time, just as he was doing his best not to listen to any of the whispers and mutterings around him in the Valley Bar that night. He retreated to his quarters early, and was going to speak with Elita, but a thump against the wall that his quarters shared with Alex's made him shudder and force himself into an early recharge instead. Ratchet was always saying he wasn't getting enough, after all.
The next morning, Alex and Megatron finally showed their faceplates. They'd clearly made use of Alex's washracks before going out, but all that did was make them clean and conspicuous as they walked into the bar side by side. Everyone fell silent at their entrance, and while Megatron paid the unusual attention no mind, Alex locked optics on the energon dispenser and clamped her lipplates shut, looking one wrong move away from exploding. They got their energon without incident, though, and took their seats at their usual table - only this time, Megatron sat down next to Alex, instead of across from her, and casually draped his arm across her shoulders. His entire bearing screamed 'mine', to say nothing of what his field was doing, and that seemed to be the straw that broke Alex's fragile hold on her temper. With an enraged hiss, she shoved his arm off her shoulders and then upended his cube of energon in his lap before grabbing her own and bouncing up, jumping over the table and stalking out. Megatron sat through it all calmly, then once she was gone, turned and let his optics settle lazily on Sideswipe. Once he was sure he had the red warrior's attention, he slouched languidly into his seat and smirked.
Very shortly, there were no less than five unconscious Autobots in the bar.
- THE END -