Some More wishes granted
Flowers for a Ghost
If pressed, Sawyer would not have been able to tell you when flowers had become his and Jin’s secret signal. Sawyer would insist, however, that it was not his idea, he didn’t go for all that sappy crap, but then you’d notice the way his eyes caught the roses in a vase behind your head, but didn’t meet your eyes. And when you asked if he had a picture of Jin, he could pull it out of his wallet with no need to search, and then he’d watch you as you studied the photograph, the Dharma jumpsuits, and the two sets of fingers brushing fingertips together.
You’d ask how it all began, and he’d settle heavily into an armchair like he’d known this was coming. “I just…he…we noticed each other, alright?” he’d almost snarl, and adjust his glasses so you wouldn’t notice the tears in his eyes. “And then he brought me a fish, he was always catching fish in that net of his, so I showed him my book. He didn’t know any English, but he wanted me to read to him. He’d pick up stuff, you know? And he had me reading to him before bed, and then he was staying in my bed.”
Sawyer still wouldn’t meet your eyes, but then he’d look up suddenly, right at you. “It wasn’t just about sex,” he’d insist, his face hard, but his eyes soft and insistent. “There were plenty of women on the island, hell, plenty of men too, island fever, big tents. But Jin…hell, we’d take walks you know. I ain’t ever walked with a woman unless it was straight to her bed, and then she was usually running, but Jin…he’d get me to dip my freaking toes in the water, look at a damn shell, watch a cloud move. And he sure as hell didn’t need English to kiss me. When he learned English, that was just a damn bonus.”
` “Should have known I was too damn lucky then,” Sawyer would say, and he’d quickly stand up, as if by showing you his back he was hiding his tears. “I never get to keep anyone I love around, should have accepted that, gotten my kiss, and moved on. But I couldn’t. For the first time in my miserable life, I couldn’t. So of course he died. Of course.”
And you’d watch as he laid flowers on a grave.
If pressed, Sawyer would not have been able to tell you when flowers had become his and Jin’s secret signal. Sawyer would insist, however, that it was not his idea, he didn’t go for all that sappy crap, but then you’d notice the way his eyes caught the roses in a vase behind your head, but didn’t meet your eyes. And when you asked if he had a picture of Jin, he could pull it out of his wallet with no need to search, and then he’d watch you as you studied the photograph, the Dharma jumpsuits, and the two sets of fingers brushing fingertips together.
You’d ask how it all began, and he’d settle heavily into an armchair like he’d known this was coming. “I just…he…we noticed each other, alright?” he’d almost snarl, and adjust his glasses so you wouldn’t notice the tears in his eyes. “And then he brought me a fish, he was always catching fish in that net of his, so I showed him my book. He didn’t know any English, but he wanted me to read to him. He’d pick up stuff, you know? And he had me reading to him before bed, and then he was staying in my bed.”
Sawyer still wouldn’t meet your eyes, but then he’d look up suddenly, right at you. “It wasn’t just about sex,” he’d insist, his face hard, but his eyes soft and insistent. “There were plenty of women on the island, hell, plenty of men too, island fever, big tents. But Jin…hell, we’d take walks you know. I ain’t ever walked with a woman unless it was straight to her bed, and then she was usually running, but Jin…he’d get me to dip my freaking toes in the water, look at a damn shell, watch a cloud move. And he sure as hell didn’t need English to kiss me. When he learned English, that was just a damn bonus.”
` “Should have known I was too damn lucky then,” Sawyer would say, and he’d quickly stand up, as if by showing you his back he was hiding his tears. “I never get to keep anyone I love around, should have accepted that, gotten my kiss, and moved on. But I couldn’t. For the first time in my miserable life, I couldn’t. So of course he died. Of course.”
And you’d watch as he laid flowers on a grave.