SPN/RPF badfic: The Healing Power Of Cock
This is what I submitted for the Bad Fic Idol contest at winchestercon. It was probably the least bad fic of the bunch, which is not a good thing. But oh well. It contains words and that is a victory for me right now.
Title: The Healing Power Of Cock
Pairing: Sam/Dean/Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC-17
Warning: Don't flame me about the dogs!!!
Once upon a tiem, two universes collided. As normally happens when really big things run into each other, everything went splodey boom and most people died. The people who survived in the shattered bits were two brothers, Sam and Dean, and two actors, Jared and Jensen. Sam and Dean hunted ghosts and demons and monsters except Sam had demon blood in him and Dean had been gripped by an angel. Now the funny thing was, Jared had played Sam and Jensen had played Dean on a TV show, and though they didn’t know it the real reason the universes collided and were destroyed is because that was just too much hot.
Now Sam was angsty because he had demon blood and demons had been using him, and he might be the antichrist, but he was a little relieved about not worrying anymore if he was going to destroy the world because it was already destroyed, but mostly he was just angsty. And Dean was angsty because his dad and the angels and everyone kept telling him he might have to kill his brother and also he had gone to hell and tortured people and then been gripped by an angel. Jared and Jensen were angsty because they used to be rich and famous movie stars and now they were in a post-apoc and also all their family and friends and dogs were dead and they were good old down-home Texas boys who cared about their family and friends so they were sad they were dead. And Dean cried a lot, well it was only a single perfect tear each time, but he cried a lot of those single tears.
"I want to find a way to cheer us up," Sam said, "except I can’t even do research it because the internet and books are gone, and that is sad because I love research like with KY."
"I have read on the internet before about something I always wanted to try," said Jensen. "The healing power of cock. But I never had a problem bad enough to be necessary of it before."
"Whatever makes Sammy happy is what I want," said Dean typically.
Jared was all \o/ and !!!!! and *sparkly balloons* and "I like sex and I am tall and have a huge cock and could give all of you lots of healing!"
So they all had sex together.
But that was even more too hot to handle and so the universe blew up again.
The End.
Title: The Healing Power Of Cock
Pairing: Sam/Dean/Jared/Jensen
Rating: NC-17
Warning: Don't flame me about the dogs!!!
Once upon a tiem, two universes collided. As normally happens when really big things run into each other, everything went splodey boom and most people died. The people who survived in the shattered bits were two brothers, Sam and Dean, and two actors, Jared and Jensen. Sam and Dean hunted ghosts and demons and monsters except Sam had demon blood in him and Dean had been gripped by an angel. Now the funny thing was, Jared had played Sam and Jensen had played Dean on a TV show, and though they didn’t know it the real reason the universes collided and were destroyed is because that was just too much hot.
Now Sam was angsty because he had demon blood and demons had been using him, and he might be the antichrist, but he was a little relieved about not worrying anymore if he was going to destroy the world because it was already destroyed, but mostly he was just angsty. And Dean was angsty because his dad and the angels and everyone kept telling him he might have to kill his brother and also he had gone to hell and tortured people and then been gripped by an angel. Jared and Jensen were angsty because they used to be rich and famous movie stars and now they were in a post-apoc and also all their family and friends and dogs were dead and they were good old down-home Texas boys who cared about their family and friends so they were sad they were dead. And Dean cried a lot, well it was only a single perfect tear each time, but he cried a lot of those single tears.
"I want to find a way to cheer us up," Sam said, "except I can’t even do research it because the internet and books are gone, and that is sad because I love research like with KY."
"I have read on the internet before about something I always wanted to try," said Jensen. "The healing power of cock. But I never had a problem bad enough to be necessary of it before."
"Whatever makes Sammy happy is what I want," said Dean typically.
Jared was all \o/ and !!!!! and *sparkly balloons* and "I like sex and I am tall and have a huge cock and could give all of you lots of healing!"
So they all had sex together.
But that was even more too hot to handle and so the universe blew up again.
The End.