Reading Room XIV - Pros and the Supernatural - Incubus by Dee
First time de-lurking and posting in this comm, so hopefully I've not messed anything up! I'm a tad early, I know, but it's Thursday in London, dang it. So, without further ado:
Title: Incubus
Author: Dee
Pairing: B/D
Link: Incubus
I will confess right off: I both love and hate fanfic involving the supernatural. Love, because it's subject matter that has always fascinated me, and hate, as it's a genre that's frequently disappointing because it is so easy to write badly. Incubus, by Dee, falls (for me) somewhere in the middle.
The tale begins with Doyle lying alone in bed on a hot, sticky August night, trying to sleep and not succeeding. Finally he tries focusing on finding a calm center point within himself and stilling his thoughts. What he achieves, though, is not sleep, but rather disembodiment - astral projection.
Deciding that it must be just a dream - astral projection isn't real, after all - Doyle first examines his own body. Then, without much apparent conscious volition, he drifts out into the night, only to wind up - of course - in Bodie's flat. There he watches his sleeping partner wake abruptly, as though feeling Doyle's spirit gaze, then continues to watch as Bodie masturbates and falls back asleep.
Unsettled by all this, Doyle drifts home and wakes up from his dream - as he believes it to be - in his own bed. Looking at the clock, he sees an hour and a half has gone by. Resolutely, he tries again to get back to sleep.
The next day, after a long session with Macklin, he and Bodie go for a pint before heading home. In the pub, the image that keeps coming back to Doyle, to the point of distraction, is that of Bodie's face suffused with pleasure. Bodie picks up a girl and abandons Doyle rather abruptly. Doyle is more amused than irritated by this - it's Bodie, after all - and proceeds to finish both Bodie's ale and his own and heads home.
Unable to sleep yet again, Doyle resorts to the same technique and finds himself once again out of body and traveling to his partner's flat. There he watches Bodie's intended bedmate leave without coming across, watches Bodie get ready for bed and go to sleep. He knows he's being compulsive in observing his partner, and briefly wonders why. The urge to watch becomes an urge to touch, filling Doyle with a great longing, and suddenly he IS able to touch Bodie, and does.
Bodie wakes up, of course, and Doyle tells him that it is just a dream. Bodie seems to accept this and urges Doyle to carry on, pulling him into the bed. It is obvious to the reader that Bodie has no issues with this, has probably had male/male sex before and definitely wants to have it with Doyle. They do have sex and somewhere in the afterglow, Doyle passes out. He wakes up in his own bed, and is promptly violently ill.
And I'll stop here so as not to completely spoil anyone who's hasn't, and wants to, read the story. ;-)
Dee wrote a number of Pros stories in the mid to late 1990s, including Cold Hill's Side and the excellent Winning The Pools, as well as the long and well-done Twist Of Fate. Incubus was an early, if not perhaps the earliest, of her stories in this fandom, and it shows a bit.
First published in the zine OTHER TIMES AND PLACES IV, by OTP Press, 1993, this story could have done with a stronger editorial hand to cut down on some of the over-writing and help better determine its direction, as it's never quite sure whether it wants to be a discovery of paranormal abilities, a first-time romance, or a case story. While it's quite possible for all these threads to exist in harmony, this story is instead a somewhat uneasy melange, with the case the lads become involved in being the weakest of them. In fact, much if not all of the interrogation and case wrap-up scenes could be axed because - as flattering to Cowley as they are - they don't do a thing to advance the story overall.
Doyle seems a touch soft, more reacting to events than making them happen, and the author's tendency to “tell” rather than “show” robs the reader of some of the impact which those events have upon him. Bodie's reactions don't always quite track, particularly in his attitude to his partner during the day after he's had sex with astral-Doyle and the way in which he accepts/deals with Doyle's new ability.
Although the story starts out strong with Doyle's newly-discovered skill, it founders with that toward the end, the thrust becoming just a mere mild push, buried beneath the lads' discoveries of each other. I think that with some restructuring, particularly in when and where Doyle uses his ability to aid Bodie, this could have been a far more taut, satisfying story.
All that said, I still thoroughly enjoy this story every time I reread it; in fact, I count it as one of my regular guilty pleasures. Why?
First off, the premise: I just love love love the idea of either of the lads with a paranormal ability, one which he uses - in fear of discovery and at great cost to himself - to aid his partner.
Second, the emotional content: despite the annoyance of Doyle's “sudden onset gayness,” (explained as/blamed on a surfeit of Catholicism in his youth,) the emotional ties between the lads are rock-solid and very satisfyingly done, particularly on Bodie's part. The story is completely in Doyle's point-of-view, but the author does a fine job of showing the reader Bodie's deep feelings for Doyle through Doyle's eyes and perceptions. We are left in no doubt that for each of them, the other is of paramount importance.
Third, the writing: despite the tendency to over-explain, there are many passages that are quite evocative, such as the description of Bodie's night-time routine, and later on the things Doyle finds in Bodie's medicine cabinet! And some sections show a graceful, interesting use of words, such as this:
The room was quiet and still, save for the gentle sound of Bodie's breathing, and the far-off rush of traffic, a sound so omnipresent in the city that its absence would have caused notice. The shaft of light coming directly through the opening in the curtains fell across the man in the bed, diagonally, tracing a path from one hip up and across his body, throwing a nipple into relief before it leaped across the narrow space to illuminate a swath across one rounded bicep.
And this:
"C'mon. Be more comfortable in a bed, mate. That's it. Shift yourself." Doyle pulled and Bodie stood up, grumbling, disentangled himself from the blanket, and allowed himself to be towed into the bedroom. Once there, his complaints became somewhat more vociferous, but ceased as soon as he had been manoeuvred into the bed. With a final incoherent mumble, he sprawled himself over most of the mattress and subsided into slumber.
Doyle stood by the bed for a moment, surveying the problem with an analytic eye, then yawned, giving up on thought as a bad idea. He slid onto the scant area left to him, rolled up against his partner and fell asleep.
So, what say you, fellow readers? Can you buy Doyle's new ability and the way he handles it? Can you see Bodie reacting in the ways that he does? How would you rate this in terms of a paranormal story as opposed to a lads-get-together story, and does it succeed as either? How might you tackle this premise if you were inspired to try your hand at writing it?
Title: Incubus
Author: Dee
Pairing: B/D
Link: Incubus
I will confess right off: I both love and hate fanfic involving the supernatural. Love, because it's subject matter that has always fascinated me, and hate, as it's a genre that's frequently disappointing because it is so easy to write badly. Incubus, by Dee, falls (for me) somewhere in the middle.
The tale begins with Doyle lying alone in bed on a hot, sticky August night, trying to sleep and not succeeding. Finally he tries focusing on finding a calm center point within himself and stilling his thoughts. What he achieves, though, is not sleep, but rather disembodiment - astral projection.
Deciding that it must be just a dream - astral projection isn't real, after all - Doyle first examines his own body. Then, without much apparent conscious volition, he drifts out into the night, only to wind up - of course - in Bodie's flat. There he watches his sleeping partner wake abruptly, as though feeling Doyle's spirit gaze, then continues to watch as Bodie masturbates and falls back asleep.
Unsettled by all this, Doyle drifts home and wakes up from his dream - as he believes it to be - in his own bed. Looking at the clock, he sees an hour and a half has gone by. Resolutely, he tries again to get back to sleep.
The next day, after a long session with Macklin, he and Bodie go for a pint before heading home. In the pub, the image that keeps coming back to Doyle, to the point of distraction, is that of Bodie's face suffused with pleasure. Bodie picks up a girl and abandons Doyle rather abruptly. Doyle is more amused than irritated by this - it's Bodie, after all - and proceeds to finish both Bodie's ale and his own and heads home.
Unable to sleep yet again, Doyle resorts to the same technique and finds himself once again out of body and traveling to his partner's flat. There he watches Bodie's intended bedmate leave without coming across, watches Bodie get ready for bed and go to sleep. He knows he's being compulsive in observing his partner, and briefly wonders why. The urge to watch becomes an urge to touch, filling Doyle with a great longing, and suddenly he IS able to touch Bodie, and does.
Bodie wakes up, of course, and Doyle tells him that it is just a dream. Bodie seems to accept this and urges Doyle to carry on, pulling him into the bed. It is obvious to the reader that Bodie has no issues with this, has probably had male/male sex before and definitely wants to have it with Doyle. They do have sex and somewhere in the afterglow, Doyle passes out. He wakes up in his own bed, and is promptly violently ill.
And I'll stop here so as not to completely spoil anyone who's hasn't, and wants to, read the story. ;-)
Dee wrote a number of Pros stories in the mid to late 1990s, including Cold Hill's Side and the excellent Winning The Pools, as well as the long and well-done Twist Of Fate. Incubus was an early, if not perhaps the earliest, of her stories in this fandom, and it shows a bit.
First published in the zine OTHER TIMES AND PLACES IV, by OTP Press, 1993, this story could have done with a stronger editorial hand to cut down on some of the over-writing and help better determine its direction, as it's never quite sure whether it wants to be a discovery of paranormal abilities, a first-time romance, or a case story. While it's quite possible for all these threads to exist in harmony, this story is instead a somewhat uneasy melange, with the case the lads become involved in being the weakest of them. In fact, much if not all of the interrogation and case wrap-up scenes could be axed because - as flattering to Cowley as they are - they don't do a thing to advance the story overall.
Doyle seems a touch soft, more reacting to events than making them happen, and the author's tendency to “tell” rather than “show” robs the reader of some of the impact which those events have upon him. Bodie's reactions don't always quite track, particularly in his attitude to his partner during the day after he's had sex with astral-Doyle and the way in which he accepts/deals with Doyle's new ability.
Although the story starts out strong with Doyle's newly-discovered skill, it founders with that toward the end, the thrust becoming just a mere mild push, buried beneath the lads' discoveries of each other. I think that with some restructuring, particularly in when and where Doyle uses his ability to aid Bodie, this could have been a far more taut, satisfying story.
All that said, I still thoroughly enjoy this story every time I reread it; in fact, I count it as one of my regular guilty pleasures. Why?
First off, the premise: I just love love love the idea of either of the lads with a paranormal ability, one which he uses - in fear of discovery and at great cost to himself - to aid his partner.
Second, the emotional content: despite the annoyance of Doyle's “sudden onset gayness,” (explained as/blamed on a surfeit of Catholicism in his youth,) the emotional ties between the lads are rock-solid and very satisfyingly done, particularly on Bodie's part. The story is completely in Doyle's point-of-view, but the author does a fine job of showing the reader Bodie's deep feelings for Doyle through Doyle's eyes and perceptions. We are left in no doubt that for each of them, the other is of paramount importance.
Third, the writing: despite the tendency to over-explain, there are many passages that are quite evocative, such as the description of Bodie's night-time routine, and later on the things Doyle finds in Bodie's medicine cabinet! And some sections show a graceful, interesting use of words, such as this:
The room was quiet and still, save for the gentle sound of Bodie's breathing, and the far-off rush of traffic, a sound so omnipresent in the city that its absence would have caused notice. The shaft of light coming directly through the opening in the curtains fell across the man in the bed, diagonally, tracing a path from one hip up and across his body, throwing a nipple into relief before it leaped across the narrow space to illuminate a swath across one rounded bicep.
And this:
"C'mon. Be more comfortable in a bed, mate. That's it. Shift yourself." Doyle pulled and Bodie stood up, grumbling, disentangled himself from the blanket, and allowed himself to be towed into the bedroom. Once there, his complaints became somewhat more vociferous, but ceased as soon as he had been manoeuvred into the bed. With a final incoherent mumble, he sprawled himself over most of the mattress and subsided into slumber.
Doyle stood by the bed for a moment, surveying the problem with an analytic eye, then yawned, giving up on thought as a bad idea. He slid onto the scant area left to him, rolled up against his partner and fell asleep.
So, what say you, fellow readers? Can you buy Doyle's new ability and the way he handles it? Can you see Bodie reacting in the ways that he does? How would you rate this in terms of a paranormal story as opposed to a lads-get-together story, and does it succeed as either? How might you tackle this premise if you were inspired to try your hand at writing it?