yada
well, I'm depressed. I think it has something to do with all the fun stuff in my life right now. I leave for Iraq in less than 48 hours. My personal life is literally in shambles. I had the revelation a few nights ago (in a pre-deployment drunken stupor) that I am the way that I am (and i mean with girls) and even thugh I know to do things differently (and better) I won't, and I'll be stupid ole phil till the day I die. This will probably have a very detrimental impact on my love life, but whatever. I'm really tired of trying to recieve some sort of unity between one (or all three) of the old girls. I need to meet new people like it's cool.
also depressing is the fact that everytime I talk to any of my family they say the same damn things. I ask "what's up" and it's the same damn reply. Right now they all want to talk to me too because I'm leaving, and it just gets real old. I don't even have a desire to talk to really any of them. but whatever.
Rebekah finished school apperantly. She texted me the other day after telling me not to call her anymore and hanging up on my ass a week or two prior. Needless to say I was a bit confused. Even more so when I was chatting with her via text she was all giddy and hyperish. That girl seems to have it all together... finished school, looking for a job, has a well paying one currently... and all the while she has no clue what she wants. I am at a loss to know how she can have it all together while she has no clue - and I can't get shit done even though I know exactly what I want to do. Fucking ridiculous. I'm tired of missing her, I'm tired of thinking about her all the time.
Then there is Amber. that fucker is joining the damn Marine Corps in mid december. What the hell? I'm going to miss her graduation (if she grads. on time) fucking corps. Ihave this crazy feeling that she's goign to get stationed here in 29er. And then I'll get to watch, from the first row, her descent into the typical WM (woman marine) whoredness. That'll be fun. I've known her for 4 years now, it'll be intresting to see how she turns out after the next 4. I'm just shy of my 10 month mark - I know you're not suppose to count until after the halfway point... but fuck this shit.
Anyways, I'm out - i'll try and post in Iraq, but that's only if anything intresting happens. Which it probably won't. I sort of have half a mind to not talk to, call, write, or email anyone for the entire time I'm over there. I think that would clear my mind and probably make my relationships a little more intresting. If you guys (all 2 of you) don't hear from me until april then that's probably what I did. I need some damn spice!
here's to the $12-15k i'll have when I return.
cheers
Phil
also depressing is the fact that everytime I talk to any of my family they say the same damn things. I ask "what's up" and it's the same damn reply. Right now they all want to talk to me too because I'm leaving, and it just gets real old. I don't even have a desire to talk to really any of them. but whatever.
Rebekah finished school apperantly. She texted me the other day after telling me not to call her anymore and hanging up on my ass a week or two prior. Needless to say I was a bit confused. Even more so when I was chatting with her via text she was all giddy and hyperish. That girl seems to have it all together... finished school, looking for a job, has a well paying one currently... and all the while she has no clue what she wants. I am at a loss to know how she can have it all together while she has no clue - and I can't get shit done even though I know exactly what I want to do. Fucking ridiculous. I'm tired of missing her, I'm tired of thinking about her all the time.
Then there is Amber. that fucker is joining the damn Marine Corps in mid december. What the hell? I'm going to miss her graduation (if she grads. on time) fucking corps. Ihave this crazy feeling that she's goign to get stationed here in 29er. And then I'll get to watch, from the first row, her descent into the typical WM (woman marine) whoredness. That'll be fun. I've known her for 4 years now, it'll be intresting to see how she turns out after the next 4. I'm just shy of my 10 month mark - I know you're not suppose to count until after the halfway point... but fuck this shit.
Anyways, I'm out - i'll try and post in Iraq, but that's only if anything intresting happens. Which it probably won't. I sort of have half a mind to not talk to, call, write, or email anyone for the entire time I'm over there. I think that would clear my mind and probably make my relationships a little more intresting. If you guys (all 2 of you) don't hear from me until april then that's probably what I did. I need some damn spice!
here's to the $12-15k i'll have when I return.
cheers
Phil