Do It Yourself Ping Pong
If you think I have a lot of time on my hands now, clearly you didn't know me in high school.
Or at least, there is some evidence to suggest that even though I'll probably easily read five books this month, there was a time I pursued less fruitful tasks. I give you exhibit A, a collection of homemade ping pong paddles circa 1998:
Now I didn't make all of these. The one on the far left, "Da Rippa," with the sweet gold paint job with lightning bolts and leather grip is mine. It looks the most used after roughly 10 years because, well, it has been involved in the most pong action.
I don't recall what the catalyst was for heading into the workshop on the other side of the basement with the idea of making our own paddles. But I do know that everyone involved came out extremely happy with the process and it has heightened the enjoyment of our basement festivities.
We've gone over Da Rippa, so let me run you through the highlights of the rest of the collection. Moving to the right, we come to the "Canada Paddle," named for it's somewhat resemblance to a maple leaf. This is one of the more enjoyable paddles to play with, despite it's uncomfortable grip. You will inevitably try to hit a ball that ends up going right in between the points of the "leaf" and look like an idiot. But hey, that's what ping pong is ultimately about right?
Next we have Da Black Knight, created by my younger brother. It too has a grip and a name featuring "Da." It's a more uniform geometric shape than mine, but I'm a far better player than Pat and thus don't need such foolishness to improve my game.
The highlight of the collection is also the smallest--the "Stop Sign Paddle." I bet you can't get how we got that name. Matches between the Canada and the Stop Sign are often the most high-larious, for obvious reasons.
The last one on the right might be the "Oriental Paddle" or maybe the "China Paddle," I don't remember which. I bet Pat will provide a comment to assist me on this matter. I'm pretty sure it was created by our older brother, thus the massive over-engineering. The handle is actually three times as thick as the others in the group thanks to extra pieces glued onto each side. I'm sure there was an official reason for this, but it does add a very different feel. If only it wasn't 438 pounds, I might try it more often. I'm also pretty sure there would be some sort of regulation against a paddle that size. Then again, I'm also pretty sure mine wouldn't qualify either, since the international ping pong authority is very anti-lightning bolt.
Moving up one to the perfectly round gold paddle, we have a paddle without a name. I guess we could call it "Mike's Paddle," since it was created by my friend Mike. You would think the others in my family would be the most-used, but Mike's is probably second on the list. We play an inordinate amount of ping pong. We are also both single. Surely the two can't be related. Mike is a total perfectionist on this type of thing, and with a bit of an art background it's not surprising everything is perfectly uniform on his paddle. Now he just has to work on his skillz.
The final one, in the top left, I have no idea who made that one. It's made of a different type of wood than the others, which I believe were all just standard plywood. This one is very thin, and has a polyurethane finish. It makes a much lower sound when you hit the ball. Actually, I bet Ben made it since it has an extremely overdone handle. As in the Oriental/China Paddle, it has three pieces, except this one has finger grooves and is perfectly sanded for comfort. If you look closely you can also see a hole drilled through the bottom of the handle, which may have been intended for some sort of string like those found on racquetball rackets.
You should probably avoid playing ping pong against anyone who has their own homemade paddle. That's like playing pool against a guy who brings his own cue in a fancy carrying case--just not a good idea. Unless of course you want to challenge me in ping pong. In that case, just bring some cash and totally take my word that I'm not very good...
Or at least, there is some evidence to suggest that even though I'll probably easily read five books this month, there was a time I pursued less fruitful tasks. I give you exhibit A, a collection of homemade ping pong paddles circa 1998:
Now I didn't make all of these. The one on the far left, "Da Rippa," with the sweet gold paint job with lightning bolts and leather grip is mine. It looks the most used after roughly 10 years because, well, it has been involved in the most pong action.
I don't recall what the catalyst was for heading into the workshop on the other side of the basement with the idea of making our own paddles. But I do know that everyone involved came out extremely happy with the process and it has heightened the enjoyment of our basement festivities.
We've gone over Da Rippa, so let me run you through the highlights of the rest of the collection. Moving to the right, we come to the "Canada Paddle," named for it's somewhat resemblance to a maple leaf. This is one of the more enjoyable paddles to play with, despite it's uncomfortable grip. You will inevitably try to hit a ball that ends up going right in between the points of the "leaf" and look like an idiot. But hey, that's what ping pong is ultimately about right?
Next we have Da Black Knight, created by my younger brother. It too has a grip and a name featuring "Da." It's a more uniform geometric shape than mine, but I'm a far better player than Pat and thus don't need such foolishness to improve my game.
The highlight of the collection is also the smallest--the "Stop Sign Paddle." I bet you can't get how we got that name. Matches between the Canada and the Stop Sign are often the most high-larious, for obvious reasons.
The last one on the right might be the "Oriental Paddle" or maybe the "China Paddle," I don't remember which. I bet Pat will provide a comment to assist me on this matter. I'm pretty sure it was created by our older brother, thus the massive over-engineering. The handle is actually three times as thick as the others in the group thanks to extra pieces glued onto each side. I'm sure there was an official reason for this, but it does add a very different feel. If only it wasn't 438 pounds, I might try it more often. I'm also pretty sure there would be some sort of regulation against a paddle that size. Then again, I'm also pretty sure mine wouldn't qualify either, since the international ping pong authority is very anti-lightning bolt.
Moving up one to the perfectly round gold paddle, we have a paddle without a name. I guess we could call it "Mike's Paddle," since it was created by my friend Mike. You would think the others in my family would be the most-used, but Mike's is probably second on the list. We play an inordinate amount of ping pong. We are also both single. Surely the two can't be related. Mike is a total perfectionist on this type of thing, and with a bit of an art background it's not surprising everything is perfectly uniform on his paddle. Now he just has to work on his skillz.
The final one, in the top left, I have no idea who made that one. It's made of a different type of wood than the others, which I believe were all just standard plywood. This one is very thin, and has a polyurethane finish. It makes a much lower sound when you hit the ball. Actually, I bet Ben made it since it has an extremely overdone handle. As in the Oriental/China Paddle, it has three pieces, except this one has finger grooves and is perfectly sanded for comfort. If you look closely you can also see a hole drilled through the bottom of the handle, which may have been intended for some sort of string like those found on racquetball rackets.
You should probably avoid playing ping pong against anyone who has their own homemade paddle. That's like playing pool against a guy who brings his own cue in a fancy carrying case--just not a good idea. Unless of course you want to challenge me in ping pong. In that case, just bring some cash and totally take my word that I'm not very good...