(no subject)
1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
Who the fuck wrote, "DIE CHUTNEE DIE!" on my mirror in blood?
2. How much cash do you have on you?
I am not dressed.
3. What's a word that rhymes with "DOOR?"?
Bore. As in, "this meme is shaping up to be a big..."
4. Favorite planet?
Uranus. No, really! It's tilted 90 degrees on its axis, so its north pole looks straight ahead like a bullseye, and its rings go around its circumference perpendicular to the direction of its orbit. Plus, it's greenish.
5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?
I don't own a cellphone. On a related note, I think that by the 500th time you've answered a meme question about cell phones by pointing out that you don't own one, your Official Anachronistic Loser Certificate should have arrived in the mail. Just saying. I'm getting there fast.
6. What is your favorite ring tone on your phone?
492...
7. What shirt are you wearing?
An olive-skin-tone shirt with a smattering of black hair. It goes really well with my skeleton.
8. Do you "label" yourself?
I label myself "The Guy Who Is Slowly Coming To Realize This Meme Was Crafted By A Douchebag."
9. Name the brand of your shoes you're currently wearing?
Wouldn't that be hysterical? No clothes, but a pair of name-brand shoes.
10. Bright or Dark Room
I prefer a bright room. The room I am in is dark, dank, and smelly. This will not do.
11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you?
I think she has kidney stones and a cold.
12. What does your watch look like?
I do not own a watch.
13. What were you doing at midnight last night?
Watching television with my dog.
14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?
493...
15. Where is your nearest 7-11?
About a mile from here, on Chain Bridge Road.
16. What's a word that you say a lot?
A collection of syllables frequently repeated.
17.Who told you he/she loved you last?
I'll never forget him: that mustache, that musky scent, the hint of exotic Andalucia in his deep voice. Alas, I do not know his name.
18. Last furry thing you touched?
My dog.
19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days?
In some cultures, they only have words for "one" and "more than one." So let's just say... more than one, raised to the power of more than one.
20. How many rolls of film do you need developed?
I do not own a film camera.
21. Favorite age you have been so far?
As old as I was three minutes before I started this meme.
22. Your worst enemy?
Zornorph!
23. What is your current desktop picture?
laimmaculada kissing my dog.
24. What was the last thing you said to someone?
"I'll never forget you, musky-scented Spaniard man! NEVER!"
25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be?
Who says I have to choose?
26. Do you like someone?
No. I don't like anyone at all.
27. The last song you listened to?
"Overcome," by Tricky.
28. What time of day were you born?
11:08 pm.
29. What's your favorite number?
Two.
30. Where did you live in 1987?
In a prison camp in the Mekong Delta.
31. Are you jealous of anyone?
Okay, not to get all language-police-y, but to be jealous is to zealously guard something. So yes, I am jealous "of" laimmaculada. If you meant to ask whether I am envious of anyone, then yes. I am envious of everyone who does not have to sleep in this basement.
32. Is anyone jealous of you?
Not so quick on the uptake, then.
33. Where were you when 9/11 happened?
Oh, you silly. 9/11 is still nine days from today!
34. What do you do when vending machines steal your money?
Weep the bitter, bitter tears of rejection, and flail about like a Sicilian at a funeral.
35. Do you consider yourself kind?
I consider myself kind of done with this meme.
36. If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be?
On my person.
37. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?
Spanish or Italian.
38. Would you move for the person you loved?
Are you kidding? I wouldn't even move over for the person I loved. No, just kidding. Yes I would.
39. Are you touchy feely?
Yes. With my balls.
40. What's your life motto?
"Am I supposed to have one?" Works in all situations. Thanks, fancymcsnazsnaz!
41. Name three things that you have on you at all times?
My head and both of my arms.
42. What's your favorite town/city?
I've always had a deep affection for Washington DC. I know, what a ratshit of a place. But what can you do?
43. What was the last thing you paid for with cash?
A newspaper. (Oooh! Big spender!)
44. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it?
About five years ago.
45. Can you change the oil on a car?
If by "change" you mean "pay someone to change," then... still no.
46. Your first love: what is the last thing you heard about him/her?
That she was feeling sick, that she had been laid up in bed all day, that she would be coming home tomorrow, and that I should be prepared to pick her up from the airport at around 3:00pm.
47. How far back do you know about your ancestry?
I am the direct descendant of Lot.
48. The last time you dressed fancy, what did you wear and why did you dress fancy?
I'm dressed fancy right now, muthafucka!
49. Does anything hurt on your body right now?
No. But the day is still young.
50. Have you been burned by love?
Yes. laimmaculada actually lit me on fire once.
Who the fuck wrote, "DIE CHUTNEE DIE!" on my mirror in blood?
2. How much cash do you have on you?
I am not dressed.
3. What's a word that rhymes with "DOOR?"?
Bore. As in, "this meme is shaping up to be a big..."
4. Favorite planet?
Uranus. No, really! It's tilted 90 degrees on its axis, so its north pole looks straight ahead like a bullseye, and its rings go around its circumference perpendicular to the direction of its orbit. Plus, it's greenish.
5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?
I don't own a cellphone. On a related note, I think that by the 500th time you've answered a meme question about cell phones by pointing out that you don't own one, your Official Anachronistic Loser Certificate should have arrived in the mail. Just saying. I'm getting there fast.
6. What is your favorite ring tone on your phone?
492...
7. What shirt are you wearing?
An olive-skin-tone shirt with a smattering of black hair. It goes really well with my skeleton.
8. Do you "label" yourself?
I label myself "The Guy Who Is Slowly Coming To Realize This Meme Was Crafted By A Douchebag."
9. Name the brand of your shoes you're currently wearing?
Wouldn't that be hysterical? No clothes, but a pair of name-brand shoes.
10. Bright or Dark Room
I prefer a bright room. The room I am in is dark, dank, and smelly. This will not do.
11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you?
I think she has kidney stones and a cold.
12. What does your watch look like?
I do not own a watch.
13. What were you doing at midnight last night?
Watching television with my dog.
14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?
493...
15. Where is your nearest 7-11?
About a mile from here, on Chain Bridge Road.
16. What's a word that you say a lot?
A collection of syllables frequently repeated.
17.Who told you he/she loved you last?
I'll never forget him: that mustache, that musky scent, the hint of exotic Andalucia in his deep voice. Alas, I do not know his name.
18. Last furry thing you touched?
My dog.
19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days?
In some cultures, they only have words for "one" and "more than one." So let's just say... more than one, raised to the power of more than one.
20. How many rolls of film do you need developed?
I do not own a film camera.
21. Favorite age you have been so far?
As old as I was three minutes before I started this meme.
22. Your worst enemy?
Zornorph!
23. What is your current desktop picture?
laimmaculada kissing my dog.
24. What was the last thing you said to someone?
"I'll never forget you, musky-scented Spaniard man! NEVER!"
25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be?
Who says I have to choose?
26. Do you like someone?
No. I don't like anyone at all.
27. The last song you listened to?
"Overcome," by Tricky.
28. What time of day were you born?
11:08 pm.
29. What's your favorite number?
Two.
30. Where did you live in 1987?
In a prison camp in the Mekong Delta.
31. Are you jealous of anyone?
Okay, not to get all language-police-y, but to be jealous is to zealously guard something. So yes, I am jealous "of" laimmaculada. If you meant to ask whether I am envious of anyone, then yes. I am envious of everyone who does not have to sleep in this basement.
32. Is anyone jealous of you?
Not so quick on the uptake, then.
33. Where were you when 9/11 happened?
Oh, you silly. 9/11 is still nine days from today!
34. What do you do when vending machines steal your money?
Weep the bitter, bitter tears of rejection, and flail about like a Sicilian at a funeral.
35. Do you consider yourself kind?
I consider myself kind of done with this meme.
36. If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be?
On my person.
37. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?
Spanish or Italian.
38. Would you move for the person you loved?
Are you kidding? I wouldn't even move over for the person I loved. No, just kidding. Yes I would.
39. Are you touchy feely?
Yes. With my balls.
40. What's your life motto?
"Am I supposed to have one?" Works in all situations. Thanks, fancymcsnazsnaz!
41. Name three things that you have on you at all times?
My head and both of my arms.
42. What's your favorite town/city?
I've always had a deep affection for Washington DC. I know, what a ratshit of a place. But what can you do?
43. What was the last thing you paid for with cash?
A newspaper. (Oooh! Big spender!)
44. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it?
About five years ago.
45. Can you change the oil on a car?
If by "change" you mean "pay someone to change," then... still no.
46. Your first love: what is the last thing you heard about him/her?
That she was feeling sick, that she had been laid up in bed all day, that she would be coming home tomorrow, and that I should be prepared to pick her up from the airport at around 3:00pm.
47. How far back do you know about your ancestry?
I am the direct descendant of Lot.
48. The last time you dressed fancy, what did you wear and why did you dress fancy?
I'm dressed fancy right now, muthafucka!
49. Does anything hurt on your body right now?
No. But the day is still young.
50. Have you been burned by love?
Yes. laimmaculada actually lit me on fire once.