(no subject)
Now I have SO much crap to post, so I'll break it down into several logically sperate entries. This is the first, its about Nan. Writing about this is important to me, but its certainly not going to be all that good to read, so I will cut this.
She passed away peacefully last Tuesday night (the one like a week ago), about an hour after I went to visit her at the hospital. It was a big relief for us all that things were not needlessly prolonged. Mum and Dad had spent nearly every waking moment by her side, along with all the other Aunties and Uncles, between them keeping a constant vigile right up until the end. The funeral was on Friday, held at Nan's Salvation Army church. It was a very nice service, not too heavy and not too focused on religion. Nan managed to fill the place - testiment to the amazing person she was. I wrote a short speach that I think nicely sums up the way I felt (and still feel i guess):
"I'm Jason; I'm about half way down on the list of grandchildren. I just wanted to say a few things that *I* remember about nan.
I remember visiting the nan's old flat with mum and dad when I was really little, the flat with the 3 identical floors each with different smells. Nan would sneak me boiled lollies, even though mum had just finished saying "Nanny, thats enough".
I remember staying over there in the school holidays with Joel. Nan helped us write letters back home, even though we were only there for one night. Me and Joel were given money to spend on when we were out, so nan took us to the corner shop and we spent everything we had on bubble gum that came with tatoos. We came home with very tired jaws looking like we had joined a biker gang.
As most of you know, I love drinking tea. Well, you can blame Nan for that, she had a tiny little teapot, big enough for one cup that she used to brew it in just for me. You will have heard lots of people rave about Nan's lamingtons, but they are forgetting just a few things: Nan's Fruit Salad, Apple Pie, and Anzac Biscuts.
Even years on, I still enjoyed visiting Nan. I would drop in for a quick visit between classes at uni. It didnt matter what time of day it was on, Nan always wanted to cook something up to tide me over until I got home. In the afternoon we would watch the cooking shows, the good ones where all the chef's have foreign accents, and in the night time we would watch trashy current affairs programs about neighbors being horrible to each other.
Nan was simply wonderful to be around. She was permanently in a good mood, and her company would always take a frown away. She was a fantastic rolemodel, someone who always lived up to their morals, which is a rare thing. She had perception and wisdom, and gave good advice when it was asked for, even if she couldn't grasp the idea of ADSL. She was in so many ways the ultimate grandmother.
She lived a good and wholesome life. No matter what you believe in, you can believe that Nan lived her life the way we are meant to. Honour her memory by living yours in the same way."
Afterwards, the whole family came back to our place to unwind and catch up with each other - lots of people had traveled a long way to be here for the funeral. The house was packed inside and in the backyard. It was like a massive Yelds Family Reunion. The entire day was uplifting and positive, just the way Nan would have wanted it.
I'm feeling good about things. I guess the tone of this entry doesn't convey that, but I truely am. Last week was utterly exhasting in lots of ways, but I have had the last few days to relax and think and unwind. Probably the hardest time for me was the day I wrote the post previous to this one. I have never had to deal with grief on this scale before, and I think it have taught me quite a bit. Thanks to the people who said nice things :).
She passed away peacefully last Tuesday night (the one like a week ago), about an hour after I went to visit her at the hospital. It was a big relief for us all that things were not needlessly prolonged. Mum and Dad had spent nearly every waking moment by her side, along with all the other Aunties and Uncles, between them keeping a constant vigile right up until the end. The funeral was on Friday, held at Nan's Salvation Army church. It was a very nice service, not too heavy and not too focused on religion. Nan managed to fill the place - testiment to the amazing person she was. I wrote a short speach that I think nicely sums up the way I felt (and still feel i guess):
"I'm Jason; I'm about half way down on the list of grandchildren. I just wanted to say a few things that *I* remember about nan.
I remember visiting the nan's old flat with mum and dad when I was really little, the flat with the 3 identical floors each with different smells. Nan would sneak me boiled lollies, even though mum had just finished saying "Nanny, thats enough".
I remember staying over there in the school holidays with Joel. Nan helped us write letters back home, even though we were only there for one night. Me and Joel were given money to spend on when we were out, so nan took us to the corner shop and we spent everything we had on bubble gum that came with tatoos. We came home with very tired jaws looking like we had joined a biker gang.
As most of you know, I love drinking tea. Well, you can blame Nan for that, she had a tiny little teapot, big enough for one cup that she used to brew it in just for me. You will have heard lots of people rave about Nan's lamingtons, but they are forgetting just a few things: Nan's Fruit Salad, Apple Pie, and Anzac Biscuts.
Even years on, I still enjoyed visiting Nan. I would drop in for a quick visit between classes at uni. It didnt matter what time of day it was on, Nan always wanted to cook something up to tide me over until I got home. In the afternoon we would watch the cooking shows, the good ones where all the chef's have foreign accents, and in the night time we would watch trashy current affairs programs about neighbors being horrible to each other.
Nan was simply wonderful to be around. She was permanently in a good mood, and her company would always take a frown away. She was a fantastic rolemodel, someone who always lived up to their morals, which is a rare thing. She had perception and wisdom, and gave good advice when it was asked for, even if she couldn't grasp the idea of ADSL. She was in so many ways the ultimate grandmother.
She lived a good and wholesome life. No matter what you believe in, you can believe that Nan lived her life the way we are meant to. Honour her memory by living yours in the same way."
Afterwards, the whole family came back to our place to unwind and catch up with each other - lots of people had traveled a long way to be here for the funeral. The house was packed inside and in the backyard. It was like a massive Yelds Family Reunion. The entire day was uplifting and positive, just the way Nan would have wanted it.
I'm feeling good about things. I guess the tone of this entry doesn't convey that, but I truely am. Last week was utterly exhasting in lots of ways, but I have had the last few days to relax and think and unwind. Probably the hardest time for me was the day I wrote the post previous to this one. I have never had to deal with grief on this scale before, and I think it have taught me quite a bit. Thanks to the people who said nice things :).