(no subject)
yesterday i received a bridal shower invitation and it was for sabrina i had no freaking clue her and jack were engaged i just saw her on my birthday and nothing was said. and shannon and will got married like 3 weeks ago. is everyone getting married? i know i'm being impatient and over dramatic but i feel as i am getting older i'm beginning to feel i'll never get married. i know i'm not dating anyone which would eventually lead to marriage but it's something that went from a thing i never planned on doing to something that is very much on my mind. i just feel i will never find someone to spend my life with that i truly love and that's a very hollowing feeling. i think that's why i have given the thought of getting back with john but that is bad news i can't settle on him it would be a horrible abusive relationship and i need to remind myself of that. i guess i'm just jealous of the happiness my dearest friends have found.