(no subject)
Just a preface: I don't use ljcut, because its retarded. if you don't like it, take me off your friends list, or go fuck yourself.
swallow mysaline: I hate not knowing things.
swallow mysaline: with a fiery passion.
helloimnurotic: oh...
swallow mysaline: because everyone has their
swallow mysaline: things
swallow mysaline: their friend circles
helloimnurotic: yea.
swallow mysaline: with their inside jokes
swallow mysaline: and everything.
swallow mysaline: well
swallow mysaline: everyone except me.
helloimnurotic: are you joking?
swallow mysaline: yeah well
swallow mysaline: we have inside jokes
swallow mysaline: but
swallow mysaline: you have your own circle of friends
swallow mysaline: and I dont?
swallow mysaline: because all my friends live over here
swallow mysaline: and they have their own circle of friends now that I've been away.
helloimnurotic: ah.
swallow mysaline: and the chance that I had to make friends in st pete I fucked up by ignoring everyone over there for caitie
swallow mysaline: so then the friends that I HAD
swallow mysaline: made ther own friends
swallow mysaline: while I was "gone"
swallow mysaline: so now I'm fucked.
swallow mysaline: so its real cute.
swallow mysaline: cause I'm not included in anything.
helloimnurotic: heh
helloimnurotic: well
helloimnurotic: i dont know.
swallow mysaline: yeah dont worry about it.
swallow mysaline: its not your problem
swallow mysaline: you didn't do it, and you cant fix it
swallow mysaline: so.
swallow mysaline: yeah.
I feel very alone, a lot. I hate it. I want to belong to something that wasn't established before me.
I'm finding a psychiatrist on campus and visiting him on a regular basis.
I really need to figure out what went on in my childhood that made me like this.
Along with my other quirks that I just really can't stand.
swallow mysaline: I hate not knowing things.
swallow mysaline: with a fiery passion.
helloimnurotic: oh...
swallow mysaline: because everyone has their
swallow mysaline: things
swallow mysaline: their friend circles
helloimnurotic: yea.
swallow mysaline: with their inside jokes
swallow mysaline: and everything.
swallow mysaline: well
swallow mysaline: everyone except me.
helloimnurotic: are you joking?
swallow mysaline: yeah well
swallow mysaline: we have inside jokes
swallow mysaline: but
swallow mysaline: you have your own circle of friends
swallow mysaline: and I dont?
swallow mysaline: because all my friends live over here
swallow mysaline: and they have their own circle of friends now that I've been away.
helloimnurotic: ah.
swallow mysaline: and the chance that I had to make friends in st pete I fucked up by ignoring everyone over there for caitie
swallow mysaline: so then the friends that I HAD
swallow mysaline: made ther own friends
swallow mysaline: while I was "gone"
swallow mysaline: so now I'm fucked.
swallow mysaline: so its real cute.
swallow mysaline: cause I'm not included in anything.
helloimnurotic: heh
helloimnurotic: well
helloimnurotic: i dont know.
swallow mysaline: yeah dont worry about it.
swallow mysaline: its not your problem
swallow mysaline: you didn't do it, and you cant fix it
swallow mysaline: so.
swallow mysaline: yeah.
I feel very alone, a lot. I hate it. I want to belong to something that wasn't established before me.
I'm finding a psychiatrist on campus and visiting him on a regular basis.
I really need to figure out what went on in my childhood that made me like this.
Along with my other quirks that I just really can't stand.