Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the most Shepherdstowniest car ever. All it lacks is a kayak strapped to the top, and a (confirmed) biodiesel engine.
(Also, Austin, I regret to inform you that you no longer have a monopoly on the production of the weirdness fringe youth movement. In fact, I'm pretty sure this small historical town in West Virginia is your supplier. Portland, you too.)
Oh how I love you, Shepherdstown. Never change.