ADF Clergy Retreat: Stagefright, Rejection, Instrumentality, and Joy

[chronarchy]

I'm in the process of working through the last of the notes so I can ship a summary to the ADF Clergy list about what went down and who got volunteered for what at last weekend's retreat, but one particular thing that my notes never can capture is the remarkable number of side conversations we have as Priests about Our Druidry, and the fellowship

Comments

[uberrod]

Regarding stage fright, the hardest part is the starting of the ritual, that is the moments before one says, "ok, let's start." Once started things are better. That, and having to lead singing I find horrible. I really don't have much confidence in myself as a singer and when leading songs you really have to put yourself out there. You can't just blend into the background of the other voices.

The weeks before my Sif ritual at Summerland was hard. I was freaking out since I set myself up to do what Ian had done and I have such respect for Ian as a liturgist. It was daunting thinking about doing such a ritual with Ian in the audience, not to mention other big wigs in ADf. I think the perceived threat of the situation was the biggest thing. Except for a few parts I was doing the whole thing myself.

But Sif and Her Chieftains had promised me that it would go well, so I had that to fall back on. I knew I would get good results and that really helped. It was then a matter of focusing on the task at hand, trying to go slow and deliberate so I didn't flub anything.

Although I did forget to use the staff that I had so meticulously prepared. And I almost forgot an offering to one of the Chieftains.

But yeah it can be nerve wracking leading ritual. But if you can remember that the people in the audience are really not judging you that harshly and are friends I find it easier to cope. Or at least pretend that the audience isn't judging you. I think being shy or introverted makes it worse because you are more prone to feel harshly judged. Outgoing people are more, "Hey, look at me!" and want the attention while shy people don't want to be noticed.

[chronarchy]

Yeah, Ian is a hefty stick to measure up to :) But from everything I've heard, it went quite well.

The singing part I'm less concerned with these days, though it used to be terrifying to me. Part of it is that I've just done it more, but another part is that I think (though I've no real way of knowing) that I've gotten a bit better at it. Plus, I do it after I've gotten started :)

[uberrod]

Although after facing a big challenge successfully, subsequent efforts are easier because you can always look back and say, "Hey, I did X, this current things is no problem." This is another tool to use to ward off stage fright.