Down the rabbit hole for me.
January 27th is the birthday of Lewis Carrol, author of ALICE'S ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND. Alice fell down a rabbit hole into a place where everything had changed and none of the rules could be counted on to apply anymore. I say, let's do the same: January 27th, 2005 should be the First Annual LiveJournal Rabbit Hole Day. When you post on that Thursday, instead of the normal daily life and work and news and politics, write about the strange new world you have found yourself in for the day, with its strange new life and work and news and politics. Are your pets talking back at you now? Has your child suddenly grown to full adulthood? Does everyone at work think you're someone else now? Did Bush step down from the White House to become a pro-circuit tap-dancer? Did Zoroastrian missionaries show up on your doorstep with literature in 3-D? Have you been placed under house arrest by bizarre insectoid women wielding clubs made of lunchmeat?
I opened my eyes, stretching and yawning all the way. It was early yet, but I was already feeling well-rested. Looking around, though, I was surprised to find that my usual world had been replaced.
"Replaced how?" you might ask. It was replaced with text. Everywhere I looked, text scrolled across to describe what I was looking at. Things existed only as description, for example, here is what I first saw:
"You are sitting on what feels to be a soft mattress. It is dark. In the blackness around you, you can make out vague shapes that don't quite fit with the rest of the shadows. To the north and the west are windows that let in minimal light and allow you to make out two doors on the south wall and a lamp, and also a set of drawers and a three-piece altar on the east wall. You are alone."
"Curious," I thought. "What a strange world this is."
"Is anyone out there?" I tried to ask. I was surprised to see text float out from me and hover for a moment before dissipating. No sound occurred.
"Curiouser and curiouser," I thought.
I stood, and the room's description again flashed before me. "You are now standing in the room. It is still dark. There is now a bed behind. you. Your eyes are adjusting to the dark some, and you can make out a clock. It is 6:30 AM, Eastern Daylight Time. You are still alone."
I stepped to where the description stated the doors were, choosing the door on the left. I opened the door, and the description of the hallway flashed into my vision:
"You step through the doorway into the hall. To the south you is a doorway leading to a bathroom that appears crowded with random things. To the west, you see a closed door and what appear to be two closet doors. There are closed doors to the southeast and east. The living room is to the northeast. It is still dark. You are alone."
I turned to the northeast and stepped to into the living room. There, I saw a description again:
"You have stepped into the living room from the southwest. There is a window on the north side of the room that lets in enough light to see. To the northwest there is a door that leads outside. This door is blocked by bookcases, boxes, and furniture. To the northeast is a television. To the southeast there is a door leading to the kitchen. There is a lightswitch. There is a black cat in this room. He is hungry."
I turned on the lightswitch, hoping that would banish the text. This was getting tiresome.
"You turn on the light in the hallway you have just left."
Oh, joy. How useful.
I turned and looked at the black cat.
"This is Raven. He belongs to Tina. Or perhaps Tina belongs to him. He has a short tail that appears to have been cut off, and a bent ear that is obviously the result of a fight. He is well-fed, but hungry. He is ignoring his dish of dry food. He is meowing."
"To the kitchen," I texted.
"Raven has begun to move toward the kitchen."
I exited to the southeast, to the kitchen.
"You have arrived in the kitchen. There is a stand of plants to your left. They need to be watered. To your right, you see the stove, fridge, bottle of pills, bottle of liquid, dirty dishes that need to be done, cabinets, two stacks of mail, and exits to the south and east. You are alone."
"Raven has joined you. He is hungry."
I stepped up to the fridge and opened the door.
"The fridge is now open. Inside, you see a half-gallon of milk, a two-gallon jug of cranberry juice, a ziploc bag of peppers, two cat-food cans, and a bottle of ketchup."
I looked closely at the two catfood cans.
"The can on your right is labled "Urinary S/O" and appears to be a perscription brand. The can on your left has a red cat-faced smile-face cap and is labled "Friskies Tuna and Cheese"."
I reached for the can on the left and opened the top, setting it on the counter. "You set the open Friskies on the counter" scrolled by my eyes. I grabbed the pills and opened that, shaking one pill out into my hand. "A half-pill rolls out into your hand. It is white and broken. Tina would call this "Raven-sized.""
I opened a cabinet. "There are plates inside, both large and small." I grabbed a small plate and put it down. "You put the Friskies onto the plate and mash it up with a knife" I read as I performed the task.
I reached for Raven. "Raven protests with a slighte "mew", but comes under your arms."
And I pilled the cat. "You grasp Raven's jaws with your right hand, and with your left you push the pill into his throat. You hold his jaw shut for a moment, feel the false swallow, and hold on until the real swallow comes. You re-open his mouth, check for the pill, and then hand him his food. Raven now appears disinterested in his breakfast, and looks at you like it's your fault. Way to go."
"Great," I thought. "Now it's trying to make me feel bad."
Out of the corner of my eye, though, I saw something that made me look twice:
"What the heck?" I texted, confused.
It looked at me and disappeared around the corner, and I heard it making noises down the stairs.
I spun around and looked down to where the basement should have been described, but instead, I saw this:
"Weird," I thought. But then, how could anyone spend all their time in a book without pictures? Down the rabbit's hole I went, and this was the rest of my day. . . No text, and all pictures:
And that is how I came to be here.
I opened my eyes, stretching and yawning all the way. It was early yet, but I was already feeling well-rested. Looking around, though, I was surprised to find that my usual world had been replaced.
"Replaced how?" you might ask. It was replaced with text. Everywhere I looked, text scrolled across to describe what I was looking at. Things existed only as description, for example, here is what I first saw:
"You are sitting on what feels to be a soft mattress. It is dark. In the blackness around you, you can make out vague shapes that don't quite fit with the rest of the shadows. To the north and the west are windows that let in minimal light and allow you to make out two doors on the south wall and a lamp, and also a set of drawers and a three-piece altar on the east wall. You are alone."
"Curious," I thought. "What a strange world this is."
"Is anyone out there?" I tried to ask. I was surprised to see text float out from me and hover for a moment before dissipating. No sound occurred.
"Curiouser and curiouser," I thought.
I stood, and the room's description again flashed before me. "You are now standing in the room. It is still dark. There is now a bed behind. you. Your eyes are adjusting to the dark some, and you can make out a clock. It is 6:30 AM, Eastern Daylight Time. You are still alone."
I stepped to where the description stated the doors were, choosing the door on the left. I opened the door, and the description of the hallway flashed into my vision:
"You step through the doorway into the hall. To the south you is a doorway leading to a bathroom that appears crowded with random things. To the west, you see a closed door and what appear to be two closet doors. There are closed doors to the southeast and east. The living room is to the northeast. It is still dark. You are alone."
I turned to the northeast and stepped to into the living room. There, I saw a description again:
"You have stepped into the living room from the southwest. There is a window on the north side of the room that lets in enough light to see. To the northwest there is a door that leads outside. This door is blocked by bookcases, boxes, and furniture. To the northeast is a television. To the southeast there is a door leading to the kitchen. There is a lightswitch. There is a black cat in this room. He is hungry."
I turned on the lightswitch, hoping that would banish the text. This was getting tiresome.
"You turn on the light in the hallway you have just left."
Oh, joy. How useful.
I turned and looked at the black cat.
"This is Raven. He belongs to Tina. Or perhaps Tina belongs to him. He has a short tail that appears to have been cut off, and a bent ear that is obviously the result of a fight. He is well-fed, but hungry. He is ignoring his dish of dry food. He is meowing."
"To the kitchen," I texted.
"Raven has begun to move toward the kitchen."
I exited to the southeast, to the kitchen.
"You have arrived in the kitchen. There is a stand of plants to your left. They need to be watered. To your right, you see the stove, fridge, bottle of pills, bottle of liquid, dirty dishes that need to be done, cabinets, two stacks of mail, and exits to the south and east. You are alone."
"Raven has joined you. He is hungry."
I stepped up to the fridge and opened the door.
"The fridge is now open. Inside, you see a half-gallon of milk, a two-gallon jug of cranberry juice, a ziploc bag of peppers, two cat-food cans, and a bottle of ketchup."
I looked closely at the two catfood cans.
"The can on your right is labled "Urinary S/O" and appears to be a perscription brand. The can on your left has a red cat-faced smile-face cap and is labled "Friskies Tuna and Cheese"."
I reached for the can on the left and opened the top, setting it on the counter. "You set the open Friskies on the counter" scrolled by my eyes. I grabbed the pills and opened that, shaking one pill out into my hand. "A half-pill rolls out into your hand. It is white and broken. Tina would call this "Raven-sized.""
I opened a cabinet. "There are plates inside, both large and small." I grabbed a small plate and put it down. "You put the Friskies onto the plate and mash it up with a knife" I read as I performed the task.
I reached for Raven. "Raven protests with a slighte "mew", but comes under your arms."
And I pilled the cat. "You grasp Raven's jaws with your right hand, and with your left you push the pill into his throat. You hold his jaw shut for a moment, feel the false swallow, and hold on until the real swallow comes. You re-open his mouth, check for the pill, and then hand him his food. Raven now appears disinterested in his breakfast, and looks at you like it's your fault. Way to go."
"Great," I thought. "Now it's trying to make me feel bad."
Out of the corner of my eye, though, I saw something that made me look twice:
"What the heck?" I texted, confused.
It looked at me and disappeared around the corner, and I heard it making noises down the stairs.
I spun around and looked down to where the basement should have been described, but instead, I saw this:
"Weird," I thought. But then, how could anyone spend all their time in a book without pictures? Down the rabbit's hole I went, and this was the rest of my day. . . No text, and all pictures:
And that is how I came to be here.