Growing Up Black

Feb 08, 2009 03:03

Laurel says:
So... [Sirius and Regulus] get interrupted by a patronus or something? Y/N?
Laurel says:
And it's just from Remus, and when Sirius shows up, he's like--I KNOW WHAT YOU WERE ABOUT TO DO!
Laurel says:
LOL


Christin says:
hahaha
Christin says:
Remus: and you didn't invite me

Laurel says:
HOW FAR DID YOU GET?
Christin says:
TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT

Laurel says:
DID YOU EVEN BUY HIM FLOWERS FIRST?
Laurel says:
YOUR BROTHER IS VERY SENSITIVE!
Laurel says:
YOU COULD SCAR HIM FOR LIFE!
Christin says:
YOU NEED TO TREAT HIM RIGHT
Laurel says:
HERE I'LL SHOW YOU HOW, LET ME HELP YOU
Laurel says:
I CALL HIS FRONT, I WANNA WATCH HIS FACE. DO WHATEVER YOU WANT FROM BEHIND.

Christin says:
LOLING SO HARD
Christin says:
(that was me)

Laurel says:
I WANT TO KISS HIM AND SMELL HIM. WHY ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT, HE'S VERY BEAUTIFUL.
Laurel says:
OF COURSE HE'S NOT CLASSICALLY, MOUTH-WATERINGLY GOOD-LOOKING LIKE YOU. BUT HE IS VERY PRETTY. AND HE SMELLS GOOD.
Laurel says:
DO YOU EVEN TALK DIRTY TO HIM? I BET YOU DIDN'T EVEN BOTHER! YOU PROBABLY REALLY HURT HIS FEELINGS! HE THINKS YOU DON'T WANT HIM!
Laurel says:
AND YOU SHOULDN'T!
Christin says:
I SHOULD THOUGH. LET ME TAKE CARE OF THAT FOR YOU.
Christin says:
YOU CAN WATCH IF YOU LIKE, I SUPPOSE.
Christin says:
TO LEARN HOW IT'S DONE

Laurel says:
HERE, HAVE BARTY, HE'S KINDA GOOD-LOOKING SOMETIMES I GUESS
Laurel says:
SHUT UP, HE'S THE RIGHT AGE, AND SLYTHERIN, AND NOT RELATED TO YOU! HE'LL DO JUST FINE!
Laurel says:
WHEN IS YOUR BROTHER'S BIRTHDAY? I WANT TO SEND HIM A COOKIE CAKE.
Christin says:
I SHALL PAINT HEARTS ALL OVER IT IN RED FROSTING, BECAUSE THAT IS HOW YOU SHOULD TREAT THE PERSON YOU'RE SLEEPING WITH
Laurel says:
NO RED FROSTING IS NOT ACTUALLY BAD FOR YOU! DO YOU THINK I'D EVER HURT YOUR BEAUTIFUL LITTLE BROTHER? I WILL TREAT HIM LIKE A DELICATE FLOWER!
Christin says:
YOU DO NOT ROLL OVER AND SAY "READY?" WHICH I DID NOT APPRECIATE BY THE WAY

Christin says:
Remus wouldn't actually know what they were up to
Laurel says:
he'd guess, with the wards
Laurel says:
and silencing charm
Christin says:
oh, if he's in the flat, yeah
Christin says:
sitting at home: I CAN SMELL YOU NOT REALLY CARING ABOUT HIM FROM MILES AWAY
Laurel says:
LMAO!

Christin says:
I HAVE PUT WARDS UP TO MAKE SURE HE IS PROTECTED AT ALL TIMES
Laurel says:
I was more thinking he comes over to see Sirius and can't get into the bedroom and Reg is missing and Barty is sulking
Christin says:
well he can't really do anything about that. They can't hear him outside and the door is locked.
Laurel says:
patronus
Christin says:
OF COURSE I WOULD RESCUE YOU. THAT IS WHAT I DO.
Laurel says:
I AM ALSO RESCUING YOU BROTHER'S VIRTUE!

Christin says:
I STOPPED YOU FROM FORNICATING WITH THAT LAD. IT'S MOST IMPROPER.
Laurel says:
WAIT--IT'S NOT TOO LATE, IS IT?!
Laurel says:
YOU SHOULD BE HOLDING HIM GENTLY AND APOLOGIZING!
Laurel says:
HERE, LET ME DO IT FOR YOU

Christin says:
HE IS A DELICATE DAMSEL
Christin says:
HE MUST BE TREATED JUST SO
Laurel says:
YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER, YOU ARE HIS ELDER

Christin says:
HERE, I HAVE JOTTED DOWN SOME NOTES FOR YOU
Christin says:
I THINK I SHALL PUBLISH A MANUAL
Christin says:
TO BE DISTRIBUTED BY THE MINISTRY
Laurel says:
HASTEN INTO YON ROOM, HE MAY NEED COUNSELING AND COMFORT
Laurel says:
MY MANUAL WILL BE HELPFUL TO ALL
Christin says:
THOUGH I MAY HAVE TO DELETE SOME CHAPTERS, THEY ONLY APPLY TO ME
Laurel says:
IT SHALL BE PUBLISHED IN FULL BOOK FORM WITH AN ABBREVIATED VERSION DISTRIBUTED AS FLIERS IN FOURTH YEAR
Christin says:
PERHAPS THEY SHALL OFFER CLASSES

Laurel says:
IT IS NOT MY FAULT I SUFFER FROM THE NIGHT TERRORS
Laurel says:
I HAVE A MEDICAL CONDITION
Laurel says:
I ASSURE YOU, I LOVE YOUR BROTHER GREATLY AND WOULD NEVER HARM HIM
Laurel says:
YES I KNOW YOU'RE THE ONE I'M SHAGGING BUT LET'S TALK ABOUT REGULUS
Laurel says:
HE SEEMS TROUBLED AND EMOTIONAL

Christin says:
I SHALL SEE TO SOOTHING HIM
Christin says:
IN A CHASTE MANNER OF COURSE, WE ARE GENTLEMEN

Laurel says:
YOU DO NOT FIND MY COCK SOOTHING???
Laurel says:
I ASSURE YOU I WOULD LUBE IT WELL

Christin says:
ANTI-BACTERIAL LUBE OF COURSE
Christin says:
HE'S NOT ALLERGIC TO LATEX IS HE?

Laurel says:
I FOUND THIS KY 'HIS AND HERS' PLEASURE PACK. I WONDER IF THEY MUST WORK TOGETHER AS A CATALYST OR IF THE 'FOR HIM' TUBE WOULD WORK WELL ALONE
Laurel says:
I KNOW LITTLE OF THIS BRAND, BUT THAT IT IS RENOWN AMONGST MUGGLES
Christin says:
THEY REALLY SHOULD MAKE HIS AND HIS, IT IS THE TWENTIETH CENTURY
Laurel says:
IT IS IMPORTANT TO BE OPEN-MINDED! WHAT SORT OF MESSAGE ARE THEY SENDING OUT?
Christin says:
REGULUS MIGHT GET UPSET IF HE FOUND OUT THAT HE IS DIFFERENT
Laurel says:
YES I AM SURE RIBBED FOR HER PLEASURE WOULD ALSO RESULT IN HIS PLEASURE!
Christin says:
BUT I SHALL TELL HIM THAT HE IS A SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE TO BE LOVED AND CHERISHED
Christin says:
ESPECIALLY BY ME
Christin says:
AND MY COCK

Laurel says:
I WOULD NEVER MELT HIS SNOWFLAKE!
Christin says:
I WILL KEEP IT PROTECTED IN A VIAL IN THE FREEZER, HE IS VERY DELICATE DON'T YOU KNOW

Laurel says:
PERHAPS I SHOULD GET HIM A DOG WITH A SHIRT. IT'S SOMETHING MIKEY WAY WOULD DO.
Christin says:
IT'S ALSO A VERY GAY THING TO DO SO I THINK HE WOULD LIKE THAT
Christin says:
YOU SEE HOW I AM THINKING OF HIS NEEDS

Laurel says:
NO YOU CANNOT BE HIS DOG! I TRUST YOU NOT TO AVOID BESTIALITY DESPITE YOUR PRIOR PROTESTS!
Laurel says:
PERHAPS HE WOULD LIKE TO WEAR THE LITTLE SHIRT
Laurel says:
I WOULD NOT JUDGE HIM
Laurel says:
HE HAS VERY HANDSOME ABS, TO BE SURE
Christin says:
I KNOW THAT ALL DOGS PUT THEIR FACES IN PEOPLES CROTCHES BUT REALLY SIRIUS, CAN'T YOU RESIST
Laurel says:
YES IT IS DIFFERENT WHEN I DO IT!
Laurel says:
WE ARE NOT OF RELATIONS.
Laurel says:
EXCEPT FOR THE SEXUAL KIND, WHICH I HOPE TO BE... OF.

Christin says:
THIS TENSE DISAGREEMENT IS ALL YOUR FAULT I'M SURE SIRIUS!
Laurel says:
WHY ARE YOU HERE ARGUING WITH ME WHEN WE SHOULD BE COMFORTING REGULUS?
Christin says:
AND BY WE I MEAN ME, YOU REALLY SHOULD GO AWAY

Laurel says:
PERHAPS HE WILL FIND MY COCK AS SOOTHING AS I BELIEVE IT TO BE

Christin says:
THAT BARTY FELLOW LOOKS MOST PUT OUT
Laurel says:
PERHAPS YOU SHOULD GO COMFORT HIM
Christin says:
PERHAPS HE WOULD FIND YOUR COCK SOOTHING TOO AS HE IS NOT RELATED TO IT
Laurel says:
YOU SHOULD GIVE IT A TRY
Laurel says:
RIGHT NOW
Christin says:
PLEASE PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE MOANING BEHIND THE CURTAIN
Laurel says:
IT IS ONLY I, LAMENTING THAT YOUR BROTHER SHOULD EVER FEEL UNHAPPY

Laurel says:
WHERE IS HIS COOKIE CAKE? YOU KNOW DOGS SHOULD NOT EAT CHOCOLATE!
Christin says:
YOU CANNOT EVEN TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF, HOW CAN YOU BE TRUSTED WITH REGULUS?
Laurel says:
THAT CAKE WAS FOR HIM! HE MUST NOT FEEL A VERY SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE IF HE HAS NOT SEEN THE RED ICING I TOOK SUCH GREAT CARE TO USE!
Christin says:
HONESTLY SIRIUS, PERHAPS YOU SHOULD HAVE A TIME OUT AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE DONE
Laurel says:
I MADE THAT ICING MYSELF, WITH FOOD DYE
Laurel says:
IT TOOK MOST OF THE BOTTLE TO NOT LOOK PINK
Laurel says:
NOT THAT THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG WITH PINK
Christin says:
I DON'T CARE IF IT LOOKS GIRLY, IT MATCHES MY SKIN TONE

Laurel says:
HE HAS RECENTLY BEEN DEFLOWERED, HE DESERVES A SPECIAL CAKE!
Laurel says:
HE IS A PRECIOUS SNOWFLAKE!
Christin says:
SO THERE WILL BE NO CANDLES, I PROMISED NOT TO MELT HIM
Christin says:
AND I COULDN'T FIND THE FIRE EXTINGUISHER ANYWAY

Laurel says:
IT IS OF GREAT IMPORT THAT WE DO NOT CAUSE HIM TO FEEL UNEASE ABOUT HIS LESSER AGE
Laurel says:
HE IS QUITE A MAN NOW
Christin says:
WHY YES I HAVE NOTICED.
Laurel says:
HE HAS FILLED OUT MOST BECOMINGLY
Christin says:
YOU WOULD LOOK QUITE NICE YOURSELF IF YOU TOOK THE CARE THAT HE DOES. ALAS.

Christin says:
(FOURSOME)
Laurel says:
omg no barty foursome, he does not deserve it
Laurel says:
HE IS REPREHENSIBLE!
Laurel says:
UNWORTHY OF INCLUSION!
Laurel says:
HE WOULD DAMAGE REGULUS'S SNOWFLAKE MOST SEVERELY, HAD HE THE CHANCE!
Laurel says:
I TRUST HIM NOT!
Laurel says:
HE IS SHIFT OF EYE!
Christin says:
HE'S GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU I SUPPOSE
Christin says:
OH DO NOT GIVE ME THAT LOOK, I DO NOT TRUST YOU EITHER

Laurel says:
YOU ARE LESS DELICATE THAN YOUR BROTHER
Laurel says:
YOU COULD DOMINATE HIM EASILY
Christin says:
HE LOOKS LIKE A WITHERING PANSY ANYWAY, HE IS NOT STRONG ENOUGH FOR MY REGULUS
Laurel says:
HE IS IN NEED OF AN ALPHA MALE!
Christin says:
OF WHICH I MOST CERTAINLY AM
Christin says:
DO NOT ROLL YOUR EYES AT MY GRAMMAR, THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT.
Laurel says:
YOU WOULD BE MORE CONFIDENT OF MY ALPHA STATUS HAD YOU ONLY LET ME TOP!
Christin says:
BUT NOW YOU SHALL NEVER KNOW.
Christin says:
I SHALL BE MOST FAITHFUL AND TRUE

Laurel says:
I BELIEVE NOT THAT YOUR BROTHER FELL FOR SUCH TRICKERY!
Laurel says:
IT WAS A BLUFF FOR WHICH HE FELL! HE IS NO ORIGINAL PRANKSTER!
Christin says:
YOU HAVE HURT HIS FEELINGS SIRIUS
Christin says:
YES YOU, NOT I

Laurel says:
HAVE YOU LISTENED NOT TO MY WARNINGS OF HIS DELICACY?
Laurel says:
I BLAME MYSELF; I AM A BRUTE AND A SCOUNDREL FOR WISHING A THREESOME TO BE DELIGHTFUL
Laurel says:
I MERELY WANTED TO TAP THAT
Laurel says:
LIKE A SYRUP TREE
Laurel says:
I AM A CRUEL BEAST. YET I CANNOT BLAME THE WOLF.
Laurel says:
NEVER MIND, THIS IS TOTALLY YOUR FAULT!
Laurel says:
WHAT WERE YOU EVEN PLANNING TO DO WITH HIM IN THERE?
Christin says:
HE MUST BE ADMINISTERED TO GENTLY
Christin says:
AND WITH GREAT PASSION

Laurel says:
IT IS MY GUESS YOU DID NOT EVEN HAVE PROPER HIS AND HIS KY PERSONAL LUBRICANT FOR HIS COMFORT. YOU ARE SUCH A CRUDE YOUNG MAN, I HYPOTHESIZE YOU MERELY GRABBED A BOTTLE OF OLIVE OIL.
Christin says:
HE IS A WINE TO BE SIPPED, NOT GLUGGED LIKE SOME DRUNKEN LOT

Christin says:
(we are.... parodying ourselves)
Laurel says:
(totally)

Christin says:
OH GO STICK IT IN BARTY, SIRIUS
Laurel says:
OR PERHAPS SOME CRUDE MUGGLE WITH A BEASTLY NATURE
Laurel says:
IT IS NOT MY PLACE TO SAY WHO WOULD WANT TO MAKE THE BEAST WITH TWO BACKS WITH YOU. YET I AM CONFIDENT REGULUS MUST DISCOVER LOVE-MAKING IN BEDROOM INTIMACIES.
Laurel says:
AND PERHAPS ALSO BATHS, THOUGH YOURS IS OF INSUFFICIENT SIZE
Laurel says:
NO THAT WAS NOT A COMMENT ABOUT YOUR MANHOOD
Christin says:
I DO NOT MAKE SUCH CRUDE JOKES AS YOU

The Twilight version.

twilight, harry potter, conversations

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