(no subject)
today, via the wonder that is NPR, i discovered a new website concept at www.wefeelfine.org. when you visit the site you can choose to enter a page full of roaming dots that are supposed to represent the infinite emotions that are flying around the universe at any one point in time. the creators of the site have developed a system that gleans internet blogs for expressions that begin with the words "i feel" and then provide the links for you to view the rest of the blog entry that accompanies any given emotion. this isn't where the information collection ends, for how could these phrases have any meaning whatsoever if you were not also provided with the author's location and the local whether at the time of the post? it's quite an interesting concept, which actually sparked an evening of insomnia for me.
i got to thinking about my life's landscape of emotions, and delved into a bit of reminiscing that involved digging through old email conversations that i have yet to discard. it's seems i used to be quite less inhibited when expressing my true emotions (at either extreme). i used to blame my forwardness on an emotional immaturity, but in looking back now i wonder if having a richer palette of emotional experiences is something for which i should morn the loss. a few years ago, if i could've had my own webpage with flying emotional dots (go look at the page or you won't understand) it would have been cluttered and overwhelming, but now, it might just be a simple line of uniform dots connected to the phrase "i feel hot", reported from ann arbor, mi, in 100 degree weather.
"life is lived forward, but understood backwards," says soren kierkegaard. this keeps me up at night. perhaps i'm not the best candidate for comparing my present to my past, but it seems i have to live my life twice just to weave together the threads that are my past into something tangible that makes sense for my life now. yesterday, when i was described as an emotionally consistent person i took it as a compliment. but now i look back on the passion in my words from just a few years ago and wonder if being so honest with myself then made me live with a little more vigor.
there is no conclusion to all of this, except that i'm finally getting tired. (and indeed there is no room for emotion in my current world of MCAT studying and work!) farethewell.
i got to thinking about my life's landscape of emotions, and delved into a bit of reminiscing that involved digging through old email conversations that i have yet to discard. it's seems i used to be quite less inhibited when expressing my true emotions (at either extreme). i used to blame my forwardness on an emotional immaturity, but in looking back now i wonder if having a richer palette of emotional experiences is something for which i should morn the loss. a few years ago, if i could've had my own webpage with flying emotional dots (go look at the page or you won't understand) it would have been cluttered and overwhelming, but now, it might just be a simple line of uniform dots connected to the phrase "i feel hot", reported from ann arbor, mi, in 100 degree weather.
"life is lived forward, but understood backwards," says soren kierkegaard. this keeps me up at night. perhaps i'm not the best candidate for comparing my present to my past, but it seems i have to live my life twice just to weave together the threads that are my past into something tangible that makes sense for my life now. yesterday, when i was described as an emotionally consistent person i took it as a compliment. but now i look back on the passion in my words from just a few years ago and wonder if being so honest with myself then made me live with a little more vigor.
there is no conclusion to all of this, except that i'm finally getting tired. (and indeed there is no room for emotion in my current world of MCAT studying and work!) farethewell.