A return involving swamp buckets and stolen pumpkins
Hello my name is Christopher and I am returning to this blog because basically ridiculous things happen and I think, "how can't I write about this, come on" and so now I am writing about it!
Right. So I work at a place called Shaw's Supermarket and it is pretty gross and bad but I don't really care because usually I don't have to do very much. TONIGHT, however, I was scheduled six to nine on an abomination known as CARRY-OUT, in which the schedule-e is required to complete several grotesque tasks, including CLEANING BATHROOMS and moving trash around and pushing carts. That's not so bad!! I bet that is what you think, but you are very wrong.
Seriously I think I stepped in pee. Like urine.
For the record I stopped writing this 'cause I got a phone call but I just started again because this phone call has prevented me from sleeping.
Yeah, so back to the urine. Pretty sure I stepped in it. Cleaning bathrooms at Shaw's is pretty gross. There's this tiny room to the left of the deli that has all of your wet-mop materials. The floor is probably cement or something, I've never really like, paid attention. But if I did, would it matter? ACTUALLY NO. Because the floor is covered in like at least 3 millimeters of this thick grimy stuff. It's like, if you want to walk on this floor, you are going to be leaving footprints wherever you go for the next couple of days. Plus your shoes will make funny noises.
Filling up the bucket is pretty gross, because whoever does carryout before me never empties it and it's full of gross brown bathroom-floor-water. And it splashes all over the place and it gets on my shoes and my pants, then people say "oh hey chris, what is that on your pants and shoes?" and I say "it's probably poison!". It probably is poison though, really.
Can we talk about the bucket again? I think you know the bucket I am talking about. It's the yellow one that probably has a guy falling over on it? Yeah, that one. I DON'T KNOW if you have ever attempted to maneuver such a bucket, but let me tell you, basically this bucket would rather take itself down than go in the direction that you would like it to go. Like you can do whatever you want. You can kick the wheels, and you can scream at the bucket and REALLY
it's not going to move any easier.
That is the end of my rant about the buckets and the bathrooms I guess. Except for a note; Shaw's has two "locker rooms" upstairs in the break room area. Generally I wouldn't go in the girl's area for obvious reasons but today I had to clean it and I find it pretty necessary to point out that it smells like root beer.
Anyway.
There is a thing called a wrap that those on carry out until 9 o clock are APPARENTLY supposed to do every night. What happens is a bunch of carriages are "wrapped" in a line around the left side-walky entrance/exit area of the store; more literally, the carriages are "wrapped" around the outdoor floral department. Now I won't get into detail, but occasionally all the carriages on the inside have to be put outside, so before tonight I believed this "wrap" was just a method of storing carriages outside.
But no.
This is actually Shaw's manner of protection for it's products that are kept outdoors. Flowers, and pumpkins and stuff.
Honestly if it is like midnight and you are seriously planning on stealing a pumpkin, there is really not much that can be done to stop you from stealing a pumpkin. You could leave your house on foot wearing neon with the intention of stealing a pumpkin and you have a pretty good chance of being successful. What I am trying to say is putting a bunch of carriages around a couple of pumpkins really isn't going to stop anyone from stealing your pumpkins. I mean, if you had some pumpkins, and you REALLY thought someone was going to steal them, would you just put wheelbarrels around them or something? NO YOU WOULD put them in a box, or you would put them in your garage, or you would rent an attack dog. You could even just mail them to yourself if you are confident in the US Mail, but you never really know. Honestly if I was a mailman, I would probably steal your pumpkins if you mailed them to yourself.
I guess that is why I will never be a mailman.
Speaking of wheelbarrels, my english teacher is a Texan and says it "wheelbarrow."
Anyway, bananas. It kind of bugs me when you go to open one, and you expect it to peel towards you but instead a little hole opens on one side and then you have to pry it open. I really hope someone else knows what I'm talking about.
THAT'S ALL I'VE GOT TO SAY FOR TONIGHT I SUPPOSE. CATCH YOU IN THE AM.
Right. So I work at a place called Shaw's Supermarket and it is pretty gross and bad but I don't really care because usually I don't have to do very much. TONIGHT, however, I was scheduled six to nine on an abomination known as CARRY-OUT, in which the schedule-e is required to complete several grotesque tasks, including CLEANING BATHROOMS and moving trash around and pushing carts. That's not so bad!! I bet that is what you think, but you are very wrong.
Seriously I think I stepped in pee. Like urine.
For the record I stopped writing this 'cause I got a phone call but I just started again because this phone call has prevented me from sleeping.
Yeah, so back to the urine. Pretty sure I stepped in it. Cleaning bathrooms at Shaw's is pretty gross. There's this tiny room to the left of the deli that has all of your wet-mop materials. The floor is probably cement or something, I've never really like, paid attention. But if I did, would it matter? ACTUALLY NO. Because the floor is covered in like at least 3 millimeters of this thick grimy stuff. It's like, if you want to walk on this floor, you are going to be leaving footprints wherever you go for the next couple of days. Plus your shoes will make funny noises.
Filling up the bucket is pretty gross, because whoever does carryout before me never empties it and it's full of gross brown bathroom-floor-water. And it splashes all over the place and it gets on my shoes and my pants, then people say "oh hey chris, what is that on your pants and shoes?" and I say "it's probably poison!". It probably is poison though, really.
Can we talk about the bucket again? I think you know the bucket I am talking about. It's the yellow one that probably has a guy falling over on it? Yeah, that one. I DON'T KNOW if you have ever attempted to maneuver such a bucket, but let me tell you, basically this bucket would rather take itself down than go in the direction that you would like it to go. Like you can do whatever you want. You can kick the wheels, and you can scream at the bucket and REALLY
it's not going to move any easier.
That is the end of my rant about the buckets and the bathrooms I guess. Except for a note; Shaw's has two "locker rooms" upstairs in the break room area. Generally I wouldn't go in the girl's area for obvious reasons but today I had to clean it and I find it pretty necessary to point out that it smells like root beer.
Anyway.
There is a thing called a wrap that those on carry out until 9 o clock are APPARENTLY supposed to do every night. What happens is a bunch of carriages are "wrapped" in a line around the left side-walky entrance/exit area of the store; more literally, the carriages are "wrapped" around the outdoor floral department. Now I won't get into detail, but occasionally all the carriages on the inside have to be put outside, so before tonight I believed this "wrap" was just a method of storing carriages outside.
But no.
This is actually Shaw's manner of protection for it's products that are kept outdoors. Flowers, and pumpkins and stuff.
Honestly if it is like midnight and you are seriously planning on stealing a pumpkin, there is really not much that can be done to stop you from stealing a pumpkin. You could leave your house on foot wearing neon with the intention of stealing a pumpkin and you have a pretty good chance of being successful. What I am trying to say is putting a bunch of carriages around a couple of pumpkins really isn't going to stop anyone from stealing your pumpkins. I mean, if you had some pumpkins, and you REALLY thought someone was going to steal them, would you just put wheelbarrels around them or something? NO YOU WOULD put them in a box, or you would put them in your garage, or you would rent an attack dog. You could even just mail them to yourself if you are confident in the US Mail, but you never really know. Honestly if I was a mailman, I would probably steal your pumpkins if you mailed them to yourself.
I guess that is why I will never be a mailman.
Speaking of wheelbarrels, my english teacher is a Texan and says it "wheelbarrow."
Anyway, bananas. It kind of bugs me when you go to open one, and you expect it to peel towards you but instead a little hole opens on one side and then you have to pry it open. I really hope someone else knows what I'm talking about.
THAT'S ALL I'VE GOT TO SAY FOR TONIGHT I SUPPOSE. CATCH YOU IN THE AM.